Why are you sad right now?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Alex Kenivel, May 28, 2014.

  1. BusinessMan

    BusinessMan SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    2,017
    Likes Received:
    409
    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2012
    Location:
    Portales, NM USA
    Nothing to do with being sad, what wtf do you do when as of recent your SO gets asshurt about literally EVERYTHING YOU SAY OR DO AS OF RECENT? I can’t even make a joke or anything without her being absolutely buttfuck offended about it.

    I’ve tried addressing it with them but bruuuuh they just get asshurt about that.
     
    Last edited: Apr 5, 2020
    Charlie Foxtrot 3rd likes this.
  2. High Plains Drifter

    High Plains Drifter ... drifting...

    Messages:
    2,650
    Likes Received:
    2,379
    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2015
    Location:
    Austin, Texas
    Can you have a civil and sincere conversation about your feelings?.. you as well as her? That's really the only place to start. You REALLY need to listen to what she's saying as well as reading her body language. If she's not willing to have this kind of talk or if she becomes easily defensive, then you may need to approach things with even more patience and compassion. You always need to consider that other things outside of your relationship may be affecting how she's interacting with you but it could also be the relationship itself.

    With the little that you've outlined here, it could be anything. And you must try to accept that "anything" may be something that y'all can get thru by yourselves or something that isn't going to find resolve without some type of mediation or intervention. But those things are up to you and she BOTH to be honest about... in terms of where your heads and hearts are with one another. If the relationship is worth working on, then you both have the right and the responsibility to be candid about that. But you can't force things in a relationship or that will only lead to resentment and further issues. Step one... Communicate, listen, and discuss things respectfully. Best of luck, man.
     
  3. Charlie Foxtrot 3rd

    Charlie Foxtrot 3rd Oakie Doaky

    Messages:
    182
    Likes Received:
    195
    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2019
    Been married 20 years but it would’ve ended a few years ago if not for couples counselling, only needed a few sessions, 4 I think but it helped. Although I was hesitant to let some douchefag therapist into our relationship, I’m glad I did. I learned some stuff. I’m not trying to tell you what to do like your dad or whatever but having someone mediate our conversations and stop them from turning into a turd wrapped in burnt hair helped immensely.
     
    soliloquy, c7spheres and BusinessMan like this.
  4. BusinessMan

    BusinessMan SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    2,017
    Likes Received:
    409
    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2012
    Location:
    Portales, NM USA
    I appreciate what both of the previous replies say but, jeez I can’t make a wrong “footing” around her. If I make a political joke, get upset, about something, or anything the like she’ll just get offended and then give me the silent treatment, hold a grudge or etc etc. I hate turning to the forums for this stuff but I’m at my wits end. Thanks to the bros that replied btws
     
    Charlie Foxtrot 3rd likes this.
  5. Charlie Foxtrot 3rd

    Charlie Foxtrot 3rd Oakie Doaky

    Messages:
    182
    Likes Received:
    195
    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2019
    Man, we didn’t talk for 3 and a half weeks, NOT A WORD, she was as cold as 10 cold things towards me. It was intense but you gotta work, keep hustling until there’s nothing to hustle for.
     
    soliloquy and BusinessMan like this.
  6. BusinessMan

    BusinessMan SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    2,017
    Likes Received:
    409
    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2012
    Location:
    Portales, NM USA
    Like dude, I’ve been giving (what I feel like) 250% but they just don’t fudging stop. They don’t like that I play a lot of video games (despite tons of attention and love), the music I like, and that I try to play an instrument that doesn’t involve them. I’m tired of the constant asshurt. If I try to talk to them, they just get upset and try to give me the silent treatment BS despite trying to talk about it.

    Sorry most of this is just venting; I can’t talk to them about this and my friends are AWOL due to theCOVID situation.
     
    Charlie Foxtrot 3rd likes this.
  7. Charlie Foxtrot 3rd

    Charlie Foxtrot 3rd Oakie Doaky

    Messages:
    182
    Likes Received:
    195
    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2019
    I get it mate, my Grandfather told me when I was a grasshopper that “women are cunts” and they are, I have 3 daughters and they show signs of being cunty, but he also said “they are worth the effort” and they are. From what you say I can tell you’re putting in the effort and you’re frustrated with the returns of those efforts. Venting is good, it helps. All I can say is it will either work or it won’t there is no in between, that’s where you are now “in between”, I was there and it’s definitely a ball ache.
     
    soliloquy and BusinessMan like this.
  8. SD83

    SD83 SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    1,424
    Likes Received:
    311
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2009
    Location:
    Münster, Germany
    More worried than sad... my cat has hardly eaten for two days. Did eat a bit yesterday, only a few treats today. I was at the vet yesterday... teeth are good, gums are good, stomach is good, no fever, no puking, no diahrea. He doesn't act any different, runs around, plays, hunts everything that moves, ate probably a few spiders and a fly tonight, likes his kuddles, everything seems fine, he just goes to any food that you give him, sniffs it, and goes away.
    A bit might be the weather, it has gotten pretty warm within the last few days and it's his first spring, a bit might actually be the stress from yesterdays journey to the vet (the car managed to get back to reasonable temperatures inside by the time I arrived there/back home), but still... another appointement later this day :(
     
  9. High Plains Drifter

    High Plains Drifter ... drifting...

    Messages:
    2,650
    Likes Received:
    2,379
    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2015
    Location:
    Austin, Texas
    @ SD83... How's kitty doing?
     
  10. lewis

    lewis SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    7,358
    Likes Received:
    3,665
    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2011
    Location:
    Norfolk, UK
    i feel like my guitar career is over and has been for a while. Natural progression. Just sort of happened.

    Band life hasnt felt fun for me for a while and people leaving the band yet again helped be the catalyst for me to finally conclude that Im probably going to hang it up. I dont have the energy or willingness anymore to do a 3rd rebuild of the bands lineup.

    Started with writers block but quickly become much more.
    on one hand its sad because its been everything to me for 15 years, on the other its a relief because as the only song writer in the band - i was under immense pressure at all times to produce the goods.

    That and the way the world and social media has gotten, being told constantly you have to watch what you do, or say, has grated on me for the last time.

    That pathetically fake "be professional at all times - dont share opinions online" nonsense has absolutely helped contribute to me being done completely with it all.

    What the hell happened to this industry!?
    Think back to Dimebag darrel doing whiskey shots, smoking joints, not giving a fuck what he said or how he acted, and just slayed guitar and had fun.

    These days its all fake, souless, manufactured horse shit. Not only does it sap the fun and life out of music and you as a musician, but it actually gets you down and depressed.
     
  11. Ralyks

    Ralyks The One Who Knocks Contributor

    Messages:
    5,070
    Likes Received:
    1,701
    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2011
    Location:
    Dutchess County, NY
    First world problem: sharing my birthday with Jesus and the apocalypse.
     
  12. Ralyks

    Ralyks The One Who Knocks Contributor

    Messages:
    5,070
    Likes Received:
    1,701
    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2011
    Location:
    Dutchess County, NY
    Howard Finkel died :(
     
  13. TedEH

    TedEH Cromulent

    Messages:
    7,572
    Likes Received:
    4,391
    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2007
    Location:
    Gatineau, Quebec
    At one point, there was supposed to be a show last night. I think it had been cancelled a while back for different reasons anyway, but obviously, that didn't happen either way. I miss shows.
     
  14. soliloquy

    soliloquy SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    4,645
    Likes Received:
    1,585
    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2008
    Location:
    toronto, canada
    I'm just disappointed. In everything around me, but mostly in myself. Life is a bitch, I fully get that. Yet I tried really hard to not let it be. I always strive to make a world a better place, not only for myself, but others around me. Yet, time and again, someone, or something manages to knock me down, and further disrespect me. As such, I am finding myself questioning what the purpose of my pursuit of happiness? It seems every person around me is so morbidly depressed, weather they admit to it or not. Every relationship I've ever seen (aside from my parents), seems to be so flawed and broken. Where people just stay together for the sake of it, but there seems to be no real emotional connection between them. Often times, they confuse history/time together as the reason to be together, as that, alone, trumps any other reason.

    its translating to me that that is expected of reality. people are shit. humanity is shit. society is shit. Everyone is willing to obliterate things around them just to make themselves happy, at the expense of others around them. No honor, no integrity, no respect, or honesty.

    I'm just perpetually disappointing in myself, and the world around me. I'm not suicidal or anything, but I'm just wondering what the purpose of this all is? to constantly be disappointed, till you die?
     
    Demiurge likes this.
  15. Demiurge

    Demiurge Intrepid Jackass

    Messages:
    4,669
    Likes Received:
    1,518
    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2005
    Location:
    Worcester, MA
    ^I can relate to a lot of this. With all this lockdown bullshit, it's hard not to take stock of things in somewhat of a negative light to where it's difficult to see the point in everything. In life, we have our obligations and our so-called "pursuit of happiness", and especially now it feels like the former has completely routed the latter. It feels like everybody else takes everything and the moments one gets for themselves, they're too tired, pissed-off, or sick to really make anything of it. Right now, I can only hope to gain perspective to re-evaluate things.
     
    soliloquy likes this.
  16. soliloquy

    soliloquy SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    4,645
    Likes Received:
    1,585
    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2008
    Location:
    toronto, canada
    The thing that is making me question my entire life stances is the actions of my partner through an affair. Its got me questioning everything, and making me wonder why am i fighting when this seems to be the final straw for me? Humanity really does suck, and it seems that those who act selfish are always willing to destroy those who act self-less.

    I get victim mentality and all. And that is not my intention here. I'm not saying 'poor me', but just why is humanity so shit? It seemed that out of all my friends, and co-workers, I some how, was the only one, living life blissfully, till this came to light. And now, I can relate to each and every person around me. Maybe this is what I deserve for being so naive.

    maybe there is no such thing as happiness, but just how much bullshit one can tolerate to call it a day, and repeat it again over and over.

    and i'm also further disappointed in myself that I can no longer be that 'mr positive' that my friends expected me to be my entire life. I always was able to spin things around for them and make them believe in another day/week/month/year to keep fighting...but now, i got nothing. nihilism seems to prevail, and I'm just finding everything pointless.

    I admit that my way of dealing with issues has always been that of an escapist. So maybe i've escaped my life far too long, and now its hitting me in the head.
     
  17. Demiurge

    Demiurge Intrepid Jackass

    Messages:
    4,669
    Likes Received:
    1,518
    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2005
    Location:
    Worcester, MA
    Of course, when bad shit happens, you want to look for stability and it's tough realizing that this stability doesn't exist when everyone has their shit. Maybe the problem is just that- even though our society trumpets notions of individualism, we often find ourselves leveraging our emotional well-being with other people.
     
    soliloquy likes this.
  18. soliloquy

    soliloquy SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    4,645
    Likes Received:
    1,585
    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2008
    Location:
    toronto, canada
    Its almost 3 years since Chris Cornell died.
    I'm more sad now than when he initially died. I always had a lot of respect for him, and enjoyed some of his work, but for whatever reason, I never got into his work extensively till postmortem.

    Though I am happy that part of what I miss in Chris Cornell, I can sort of find in Ian Thornley of Big Wreck.
     
  19. lewis

    lewis SS.org Regular

    Messages:
    7,358
    Likes Received:
    3,665
    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2011
    Location:
    Norfolk, UK
    my eldest daughter (4) is really missing both school, friends and even other relatives.
    Bless her. Feel so sorry for them because they dont understand the situation. They just have the feelings but dont know why.
     
  20. p0ke

    p0ke 7-string guitard

    Messages:
    1,657
    Likes Received:
    777
    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2007
    Location:
    Salo, Finland
    Same here. My stepson (9) basically acts as if the whole thing is a personal punishment for him. And my daughter (4 in a couple of weeks) really misses both her grandmoms and keeps asking why we can't go swimming... I really hope the worst will be over by summer so we can at least hit the beach and stuff like that.
     
    lewis likes this.

Share This Page