SS Love and Relationships Thread

Varcolac

Frets? What frets?
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dead body dreams, Jeremy and flakiness

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Get out now. Too much crazy. So you're in love with her. Big deal. We fall in love all the time. Last 15 years of my life it's happened at least four times. Every time there's been a feeling that this is "the one," but things break down. Mostly amicably. Once less than amicably. Every time much crying. It doesn't get easier for relationships to end, but you do become more sure of what you want from a relationship.

Unless you want the cray-cray, my answer is a firm "NOPE."
 

broj15

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^^^ must be going around. She asked me to stop by her work when i got off last night so I did. She acted happy to see me and we talked for a bit, but I wasn't trying to hang around too long as I'm not trying to get in deeper than I already am (I know, right?) and I was on my way to practice. Now, I'll preface this by saying that for someone who only plans her life a few days in advance her schedule is pretty full for the next week and a half, with no attempt made by her to hang out with me - something she said she'd work on if we give it one more shot. So before I left we had this exchange:

Me: So I guess I'll see you whenever
Her: We're going to hang out eventually
Me: I'm sure
Her: Hey, don't say it like that. I'm gonna get a hold of you. ok?
Me: I'm sure
Her: Okay... (I can tell by her expression and body language that I had hurt her)
Me: What?
Her: Nothing...
Me: It's obviously not "nothing"
Her: I'll get a hold of you and we'll talk

So yeah. Just waiting for the inevitable end at this point. I should've known better. I should've just bailed when I found out she lied about having a boyfriend in the first place. Whatever, bad decisions have been a running theme in my life for quite some time so i guess I shouldn't be surprised.
 

broj15

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^^^ Wow. I know for a fact I have said those exact words to friends many times. Ironic.
 

broj15

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^^^ and I guess I should've taken my own advice. My suspicions were right. Its done.
 

Mathemagician

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Just general life observation: if you're spending all your time & energy trying to "make things work" with a cheater/person who obviously doesn't respect you; it's going to suck when you meet someone whose actually awesome as hell and you want to ask them out. But you're not a cheating asshole so now you're stuck/committed to your crummy relationship that doesn't make you happy, due to the "sunk cost fallacy" of how much effort you've put in.

Don't make people a priority who treats you like a "backup option" (at best).

You dumbasses already play guitar. Work out a tiny bit, volunteer somewhere/pick up another cool hobby and meet cool people.

Just things I've learned.
 

ftr

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I made the mistake of checking up on my ex and apparently she went to move in with her ex it looks like. I was devastated again, but i am actually kind of glad i did. I needed to let more out and i did. I made the decision to not just lie down and be sad and instead i am going to start major self-improvements. I decided to start getting in great shape and get my mind off of jumping into another relationship. I have received so much wise advise that is finally starting to change my mindset. It was hard before because my mind was so clouded with grief. I am actually glad i made that mistake and went through that brief devastating feeling of grief again, it was not too bad but it was enough to finally make my mind click and realize i need to start taking control and improve my life, and fight being lazy and content. I am going to start a crossfit program this week, and it looks like it will really get me in great shape and i won't eventually burn out on it. I am motivated and it feels great.
 

ASoC

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Had another dream about my ex last night. Not a depressing one this time, though. We were at my old house for whatever reason; when I decided to leave I got outside, found my car (which is gone now, it got totalled last month), and found that I had forgotten my key inside (this is probably because my key ring irl doesn't have a car key on it anymore). I turned around and she came out with the car key. I mentioned that I had forgotten my key and she asked if I forgot about her. I didn't really understand what she meant, so I let it go. We both walked over to my car and talked for a bit and she hinted at wanting to try a relationship again. Even though I know that would probably be a mistake and I always advise against doing it, I found that it made happy to hear her say that. On that note, I got into my car feeling terribly pleasant and woke up.

The thing that gets me is how vivid it was. The settings and people of my dreams mostly come from memories, but there's always something off. This time, my house, all its furniture, and it's location were perfectly detailed. Even my ex was exactly as I remember; her voice, her face, her diction, and her mannerisms were all right. Our conversation was smooth and easy just like it used to be before things took a downturn. I felt like myself (confident/charming instead of shy/neurotic) for the first time in years.
 

ThePIGI King

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Exes are exes for a reason.

Because she left me and I never got over her/it. So, it's slightly helpful, because she and I are very close, making it cool to have somebody to talk to. It's devastating, though, because I know deep down I want to be with her, and I can't for so many reasons. I know I shouldn't get back with her anyways, after everything...but she seems to be doing a lot better, and she genuinely apologized for everything. At the end of the day, I'm just glad I have somebody to talk to again I guess.
 

Maybrick

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I made the mistake of checking up on my ex and apparently she went to move in with her ex it looks like. I was devastated again, but i am actually kind of glad i did. I needed to let more out and i did. I made the decision to not just lie down and be sad and instead i am going to start major self-improvements. I decided to start getting in great shape and get my mind off of jumping into another relationship. I have received so much wise advise that is finally starting to change my mindset. It was hard before because my mind was so clouded with grief. I am actually glad i made that mistake and went through that brief devastating feeling of grief again, it was not too bad but it was enough to finally make my mind click and realize i need to start taking control and improve my life, and fight being lazy and content. I am going to start a crossfit program this week, and it looks like it will really get me in great shape and i won't eventually burn out on it. I am motivated and it feels great.

This is excellent news man.

The motivation will come from the results you see from your workouts. The main thing to remind yourself is that you're getting in shape for yourself and because it makes YOU happy. Don't have the key driving force be that you want to look good for a girl otherwise you'll fall into the common trap of when you get into another relationship, you'll start slacking on your workouts because you feel 'comfortable'.
 

Ibanezsam4

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I made the mistake of checking up on my ex and apparently she went to move in with her ex it looks like. I was devastated again, but i am actually kind of glad i did. I needed to let more out and i did. I made the decision to not just lie down and be sad and instead i am going to start major self-improvements. I decided to start getting in great shape and get my mind off of jumping into another relationship. I have received so much wise advise that is finally starting to change my mindset. It was hard before because my mind was so clouded with grief. I am actually glad i made that mistake and went through that brief devastating feeling of grief again, it was not too bad but it was enough to finally make my mind click and realize i need to start taking control and improve my life, and fight being lazy and content. I am going to start a crossfit program this week, and it looks like it will really get me in great shape and i won't eventually burn out on it. I am motivated and it feels great.

i became really confident and motivated when i started working out. Have fun with it :yesway:
 

BucketheadRules

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Woah I must've missed something unless you haven't posted about it

Kept it quiet on here, yes.

Met another girl after getting back on Tinder, following the whole sh*tstorm with my ex back a couple of months ago. Wasn't looking for anything serious really, but we hit it off and agreed quite early on to meet. Swapped numbers, started texting the whole time, met a couple of times, everything went well.

She's like me in that she develops pretty strong feelings pretty quickly, and that's how it's turned out. She's told me quite a few times that she's really, really into me and wanted something more serious. I like her a lot too, more so the more we talk and see each other, so last time we saw each other we decided to make it official. :) Seems like we'll both be genuinely happy, which is what I've always wanted. Never known any girl to feel like this about little ol' me before. Feels good man.
 

Taylor

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Got a date with a girl next Tuesday. After 5 years of being single and dealing with severe depression and anxiety for most of my life, it feels good asking a girl out (and getting a "yes"). It is also moderately terrifying :lol:
 

Maybrick

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Got a date with a girl next Tuesday. After 5 years of being single and dealing with severe depression and anxiety for most of my life, it feels good asking a girl out (and getting a "yes"). It is also moderately terrifying :lol:

As cliche and easy as it is to say, just relax when you meet up - make as much eye contact as you can and you'll be fine.
 
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