I'm Transgender. Ask me anything.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by SexHaver420, Dec 8, 2020.

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  1. SexHaver420

    SexHaver420 Oops I'm a girl.

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    I'll go back and reread everything when I get off work and make a long post. I just dont have time to do it on my break
     
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  2. AxeHappy

    AxeHappy SS.org Regular

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    Little bits I'd like to respond to and I'm too lazy to quote so:

    Bi is attraction to two or more genders, pan is attraction *regardless* of gender. My wife goes by Bi, I go by pan. The specific argument about bisexuality being transphobic is a bunch of history and comes from back in the day most people were transphobic so most bi people were transphobic and pan came about as a way to say that one didn't have that problem and blah blah blah. Nowadays this isn't really an issue.

    Post Modern philosophy merely means that one doesn't think, as the modernist did, that one grand explanation can explain *everything* and there is a *massive* amount of post modern philosophy dealing with all sorts of subjects. Most the stuff that has stood the test of time is indeed something like what Adam has suggested except there is plenty of stuff that doesn't deal with oppressors at all. Literally everything that involves language having to be subjective is pretty solid philosophy that's been around for a while.

    Sexologists decided to change the definition of gender (from an academic standpoint) in the 1970s. It has slowly been filtering down into public consciousness.

    There isn't really much debate about gender at the academic or expert level anymore. It's mostly just the public arguing about having to accept the reality of it as it is a pretty massive change from the CisHetMono Normativity that many of us were raised in.

    I'm a gender abolitionist, and yes we definitely exist, and it turns out that if one accepts that gender is an arbitrary construct that has changed massively throughout history and in many cultures has had all sorts of options outside of the Man/Woman binary and what roles various genders are expecting to fulfill seem to change, almost at random, throughout time and cultures that you won't have a problem with whatever gender one feels comfortable being. I've *never* heard of any Enbys having any issue with the more binary trans people. Also, again, as I feel like this may have been missed earlier based of language that non-binary, gender fluid, gender non-conforming, agender, etc people are all trans people. The gender abolitionist arguments that come from TERFs are an entire other discussion, and I don't wish to pull too far from our OP's intent

    Trans is *not* short for transitioning. The term comes from organic chemistry, just like cis. One can choose to transition as much, or as little, as they want or feel comfortable with and this has no bearing whatsoever on who they are.

    I actually think the trans sexual vs trans gender thing is interesting, and likely could be a useful distinction but...trans sexual was used as a slur for quite a while so it is a pretty stained term that most avoid. I'm personally fine with it but I respect other trans people who despise that term. Much like many old members of the GSRM community (Gender, Sexual, Romantic Minorities. A much better acronym than LGBTQ+ imo) feel that Queer is a savage slur and I absolutely respect that and won't use that term for or around them, even though much of the younger community has embraced the term as a loving catchall instead of listing every useful identifier they might have.
     
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  3. Necris

    Necris Bonitis.

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    I don't see any contradiction between wanting to offer insight into trans issues and wanting to be able to live as one desires as long as it isnt harming anyone. One is necessary to achieve the other. In our current reality lacking knowedge and misconceptions about trans people are working against that greater aim and instead have led to trans people being pushed to the fringes of society, used as convenient political scapegoats, and dehumanized etc. Outreach and attempts to educate are difficult undertakings but are necessary at present.
     
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  4. TedEH

    TedEH Cromulent

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    This I wouldn't have known, and does explain some of what I was aiming for with that question (if that's what this was in response to), so thanks for that.
     
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  5. Manurack

    Manurack Nunavut Inuk

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    Why did my replies get deleted? Does SSO not have a sense of humour anymore? Or is the OP's parent a moderator? I replied as a fucking joke with the Ibanez RG name FFS.
     
  6. SexHaver420

    SexHaver420 Oops I'm a girl.

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    I agree with pretty much everything in this post and it'll save me a lot of time because now I don't feel like I have to write a long one.

    There are a few reasons I didn't respond to a bunch of the longer posts

    1. I'm kinda stupid

    2. I don't know or care enough about philosophy to talk about it with people smarter than me on the internet

    3. I just don't really want to talk about things like the nature of gender because I just think that sex is what chromosomes you're born with and gender is how you feel and describe yourself.

    4. I don't really like to think about gender super deeply other than what I feel mine is because a lot of the time it makes me kind of dysphoric because I think about things like "no matter what I do with my hair and makeup and voice I just get called sir at work all day".
     
    Last edited: Dec 14, 2020
  7. spudmunkey

    spudmunkey SS.org Regular

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    Your "joke" was posting something that is insulting and was supposed to apparently be a sarcastic joke that we were all supposed to "get"? It was posted with zero context that it was anything but meant at face value. Poe's Law, and all that. Whether you meant it as an insult or not, that's how it read (to me at least, and I'm not a mod, so someone else felt the same).
     
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  8. SexHaver420

    SexHaver420 Oops I'm a girl.

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    Because it's transphobic whether you think it is or not. It's a slightly more creative version of the attack helicopter joke that's really low effort and stupid. I don't really even mind if you make transphobic comments or jokes on this thread but you at least need to apply yourself and make them sort of amusing.
     
  9. BornToLooze

    BornToLooze SS.org Regular

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    That actually makes all this kinda stuff make a lot more sense. I've always just looked at it as 2 words for the same thing.
     
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  10. BlackMastodon

    BlackMastodon \m/ (゚Д゚) \m/ Contributor

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    This was basically the norm up until the last decade or so, I feel like we used the 2 words interchangeably all the time as a society.
     
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  11. TedEH

    TedEH Cromulent

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    Most people are stupid on some level, so if you honestly think that, then you're at least in good company.

    Me neither, I'm far from an expert, but somehow that never stopped me. There's an expression something like if you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room.

    Why post the thread if you don't want to talk about it?

    This is something I don't understand. If it's going to be something that you use as the basis for who you are and how you present yourself to the world, why would you not want to think deeply about it?

    I'll reiterate that I'm not asking to criticize, I'm asking because I genuinely don't understand - and you did post multiple threads asking people to ask you questions so that you could educate them.
     
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  12. eggy in a bready

    eggy in a bready SS.org Regular

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    because that joke was on some lame facebook uncle level of quality. do better, sweaty
     
  13. SexHaver420

    SexHaver420 Oops I'm a girl.

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    The third part part was directed at the whole philosophical part that was going on. I genuinely don't know enough about philosophy to think I can contribute to the philosophical part of the conversation. I can just say how I feel and those seem to be two different things.

    The fourth part is that I don't really think about my gender anymore. I've thought about it and questioned it for about 20 years and I've finally come to peace with who I am on the inside. I don't really need to think about it anymore. I'm doing what I can to make the outside match as best I can. If I think about it or worry about it too much some really difficult old memories come up sometimes. I have a counselor who helps me deal with stuff like that and it's still pretty rough a lot of the time.

    Sorry for not being more clear about what I mean. It's my weekend tomorrow and I'm tired and kind of out of it.
     
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  14. DrakkarTyrannis

    DrakkarTyrannis

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    ....can we talk about that weird straight guy fear of "he/shes" tricking them into sex? This comes up way more than it should when on the topic of trans/crossdressers/drag queens, etc. I feel like the vast majority of transphobia comes from the homophobic fear men have of being "forced" to have sex with another man. There are still places where the "gay panic" defense is legally accepted for when some guy kills a trans woman.

    Now to be fair..99% of the time a guy dealing with a trans woman knows he's dealing with one because those guys specifically look for those girls. I loathe chasers with an absolute passion and have threatened to crack the skulls of quite a few of them. It's impossible to have sex with a trans woman and somehow not know it unless you're from another planet and have no clue how sex with women works.

    Beyond that it wasn't until I did drag that I understood just how goddamn stupid a lot of straight men are. All they see is titties and they pay no attention to anything else. I've been hit on a million times and it's painfully obvious that I'm a drag queen, yet they legit don't know until I tell them and then they back off.

    How do you look at a 6'7 300lb woman with giant eyebrows, inhumanly large top and bottom lashes, and more makeup than a circus clown and think "Yup...nothing out of the ordinary here"
     
  15. SexHaver420

    SexHaver420 Oops I'm a girl.

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    The reason straight men attack transgender women after they find out they're trans is because they're insecure. They think it somehow "makes them gay" for being attracted to them and their friends will make fun of them if they find out. They don't want to be seen as less of a man. Trans women are still women so they're just stupid.

    Chasers are gross and shouldn't exist. For those of you who aren't aware chasers are people (mostly men) who are attracted to and fetishize transgender people just for their genitals.

    I mean this is the least sexist way possible but I'm 100% certain more men think with their dicks than their brains. I also think everyone could use a bit less testosterone because I can confirm that it helps a lot with that issue.

    Also drag is cool and fun so keep doing that.
     
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2020
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  16. Manurack

    Manurack Nunavut Inuk

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    Wow. Pansies.
     
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2020
  17. DrakkarTyrannis

    DrakkarTyrannis

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    Yup. Guys are super insecure and feel like being attracted to a "man" makes them gay.

    Chasers are the fucking worst. I hate them so much that I won't even tolerate a guy hitting on me while I'm in drag even if he's into me out of drag. Hard no. When I was first starting out I would be at least somewhat nice to them because they tipped a lot if you were nice..but as time went on I wouldn't even bother taking their money. Fuck dem bitches.

    And yeah I quit drag years ago. I don't plan on going back to it, but I honestly recommend all men to try it for a while. You start to understand a lot of what cis and trans women go through on a daily basis.
     
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  18. c7spheres

    c7spheres GuitArtist

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    Whats wrong with guys that chase trans women? Doesn't everyone chase whatever they like? What do you mean by chasers?
     
  19. eggy in a bready

    eggy in a bready SS.org Regular

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    re: straight men

    gay men can be all of the same sorts of stupid and predatory that straight men are. i used to work in the castro here in sf, and there is definitely a seedy underbelly of sorts. i've had friends roofied and woken up in strange places. sexual assault. underage prostitution. it's just a thing with men, no matter their orientation

    the drinking/drug culture associated with the gay lifestyle helps exacerbate things, too
     
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2020
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  20. DrakkarTyrannis

    DrakkarTyrannis

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    "Tranny Chasers" are obsessive dudes who chase anything with a dick in a skirt.

    They don't bother acknowledging the distinction between crossdressers, drag queens, and trans women.

    They fetishize the whole chicks with dicks thing. They're pushy, always sexually harassing girls, and are generally creepy.

    Not to mention you will NEVER see these dudes advocating for trans rights. These guys will NEVER actually protect trans people. The vast majority of the time they're the ones killing them because they don't want their cover to be blown. These guys don't actually love trans women, they see them as porn fantasies and often prey on them BECAUSE they know society looks down on them. They figure they can get away with harassing, beating, mistreating, killing trans women because no one is gonna care.
     
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