If SSO was a prison...

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by josh pelican, Jan 28, 2011.

  1. highlordmugfug

    highlordmugfug themuthaphukkindeath

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    I will gladly settle for being any character at all from that show.
     
  2. vampiregenocide

    vampiregenocide SS.org Regular

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    It would be a brilliant movie. Cameo by Seth Rogen and we're laughing.
     
  3. Grand Moff Tim

    Grand Moff Tim Some call me... Tim

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    I'd be the baby bird in the old man's shirt pocket.
     
  4. Stealthdjentstic

    Stealthdjentstic Banned

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    I'd send nudes to the guards.
     
  5. MaxOfMetal

    MaxOfMetal Likes trem wankery. Super Moderator

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    :wub:

    That's easily one of my favorite shows. I have season one on DVD and it still cracks me up.

    Have you heard that Jason Publick from The Venture Brothers is on the writing team now? Get ready for the win. I just hope they start playing it in February like they planned instead of pushing back to May for sweeps. Really? Adult Swim gives a shit about sweeps week? :lol:
     
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  6. Explorer

    Explorer He seldomly knows...

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    Seriously?

    I'm the guy who is the fixer, who knows how to mediate and to ease the friction. I don't ask for a cut, just for a favor down the line. I don't help with drug deals. Even the hacks know I can smooth the way, but if they try to put the screws on me, they're wasting their time.

    When you've decided that you want some of the action, and since you obviously don't know that I don't work with any form of currency other than juice and network, you might lean on me a little, and then find out that both the Latinos and the White Power boys have got my back. Why? You'll never know, bitch. Barring that, you might think that you'll have better luck if you catch me alone... but then you find out the question is, do you want to dance? Because I *love* to dance.

    Eventually, you might find out why people call me the Professor. At that point, you'll wish you hadn't.

    I'd probably be out by now, but I'm no longer allowed even those little pencils you use to fill out your requests on those little forms from the commissary, since the last time someone got stupid and wound up with that little stumpy golf pencil slapped flat through their eye with the palm of my hand. Can you believe they even count my plastic tableware after I'm done eating? Fuckin' hacks. Still, even though I didn't talk, they know that I wouldn't do something like that for no reason, so they put me back into GenPop after a few months in Solly.

    Every celly since then has been a perfect gentleman.

    Oh, wait... is this supposed to be about our time in service to the state, or about doing federal time... or a *hypothetical* SS.org prison?

    Just ignore all that, then.
     
  7. Prydogga

    Prydogga Giddyup.

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    Fzau would be the little gay man who got caught dealing heroin, and follows 'accused' rapist JohnIce. JohnIce settles all the 'man on man' problems.

    :wub:
     
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  8. gunshow86de

    gunshow86de Beef Jerky Time

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    I'd also like to be in charge of helping people pick up their dropped soap. ;)
     
  9. Thep

    Thep Blast & Sweep

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    I'm the one who beats the shit out of anybody who I feel are not worthy of my presence, and uses a charcoal pencil to create morbid artwork...because I'm so fucking metal.
     
  10. Chickenhawk

    Chickenhawk A Bad Idea Contributor

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    Bring it :squint:


    [​IMG]
     
  11. gunshow86de

    gunshow86de Beef Jerky Time

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    ^

    Come at me bro.

    [​IMG]
     
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  12. failshredder

    failshredder hammer every cock

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    I'd be the guy who was there just to talk about what a ridiculous badass he'd be in prison. Just like everyone else.
     
  13. josh pelican

    josh pelican Banned

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    Jason, Jeff, Michael (Ibz_rg), and I are part of a click.

    We don't need to ask why Jason is in here. Michael is in because he is guilty by association. He was with me. He's basically my bitch.

    Every day I get a new hand poked tattoo.

    I have weapons made out of everything. Blades in the end of toothbrushes, blades in deodorant, socks filled with bars of soap, knuckle dusters, and even a shiv disguised as a Cross of St. Peter:
    [​IMG]

    I also deal cigarettes and other things that aren't discussed in the open.

    I have 1,000 books with glued pages. I carved out squares to hide things. There's a lot of cell-to-cell communication via ropes and such. This way, people can throw food/money/smokes to other cells. For example, if someone needed protection services, or wanted to be part of a click, they would use the rope to throw currency to the appropriate cell.
     
  14. Guitarman700

    Guitarman700 SS.org Regular

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    But do you a Cross of St Peter disguised as a shiv?
     
  15. Origin

    Origin Rainbow In The Dark

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    I tried to pick up the DVD but everywhere in town sold out, as in the one place in my town that had it had one copy and some lucky asswipe got to it. I might order it, even though I already have it- completely...legally..some..how. :ugh: Wizards.

    And really?!? Jesus, it's already a mind-bending hilarious superviolent trip through the psychedelic subconscious, now he's on? :lol: I'ma bust when this one starts coming out, I can't get over how attached to that show I've become.
     
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  16. josh pelican

    josh pelican Banned

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    It's all the same, really.
     
  17. highlordmugfug

    highlordmugfug themuthaphukkindeath

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    I'm + repping both of you.
     
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  18. Guitarman700

    Guitarman700 SS.org Regular

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    Superjail Avatars. GO!
     
  19. stryker1800

    stryker1800 Sweet Pickle

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    you sir should win this thread.
     
  20. Scar Symmetry

    Scar Symmetry Ex Whiny Bitch

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    JohnIce would also draw the inmates like Leo drew Kate in Titanic...

    For a small fee :lol:
     

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