# "Top 10 Douchiest Guitarists of All Time"



## JEngelking (Feb 13, 2013)

Top 10 Douchiest Guitarists of All Time - New York - Music - Sound of the City

What are your thoughts on the list? I was kinda surprised at a couple.


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## Black Mamba (Feb 13, 2013)

I think David Shankle should have been in all 10 spots.


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## Joshua (Feb 13, 2013)

I thought it was pretty funny


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 13, 2013)

Did I miss something?


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## BrainArt (Feb 13, 2013)

Most of the list I agree with save for two. Satch and Vai.

Whoever wrote this list should do more research, because Satch never taught Malmsteen and never did anything for Top Gun.


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## kung_fu (Feb 13, 2013)

I somehow knew Vai was going to be high up there. He's a great guitarist, but sometimes I just wish he'd stop with the faces.


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## tedtan (Feb 13, 2013)

While I agree that Malmsteen is a douche, I don't think the author understands the meaning of the word in this context.


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## InfinityCollision (Feb 13, 2013)

Satch and Vai in the top 5? Huh? I think at some point this turned into "I need a pretense to call this guy a wanker, but in such a way as to insult their persons as well as their playing." EVH at #2 purely on the basis of Eruption is also rather silly. Speaking of which, Eruption is now 11 minutes long.

John Mayer should've been higher and I see no mention of Maestro Alex Gregory!


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## Jake (Feb 13, 2013)

Because you are now more of a douche the more emotion you put into your playing apparently? 

I dont get it


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## JEngelking (Feb 13, 2013)

BrainArt said:


> Most of the list I agree with save for two. Satch and Vai.
> 
> Whoever wrote this list should do more research, because Satch never taught Malmsteen and never did anything for Top Gun.



Agreed. I don't think that Satch really comes across as douchey, and I see how people could see Vai like that, with the faces and such, but hell, I might get a little overly confident if I was that good.


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## JEngelking (Feb 13, 2013)

717ctsjz said:


> Because you are now more of a douche the more emotion you put into your playing apparently?
> 
> I dont get it



Of course, that's the way that it goes, didn't you know?


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## wankerness (Feb 13, 2013)

The fact it includes Esteban sort of excuses any collateral damage. The fact that guy is synonymous with classical guitar to much of the general public is a largely ignored crime against all that is right and holy.


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## PureImagination (Feb 13, 2013)

tedtan said:


> While I agree that Malmsteen is a douche, I don't think the author understands the meaning of the word in this context.



I agree.


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## Hollowway (Feb 13, 2013)

I don't entirely agree with the list, but I will say that the very idea of the "Top 10 douchiest __________ of all time" is such an awesome formula it brings peace and a calmness to my cynical, ironic, jaded outlook on the world. The only thing truly missing is a list like this for politicians, artists, singers, movie stars, etc.


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## Joose (Feb 13, 2013)

Why isn't Dave Navarro on there?


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 13, 2013)

Why isn't half of all -core, glam and emo guitarists there?


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 13, 2013)

Satch is in the top 5 and Vai is #1 on a list of douches. 

Either this is an unsuccessful researcher or a successful troll.


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## ncfiala (Feb 13, 2013)

This list is ridiculous. Why are Malmsteem, Vai, EVH, Satch, and MAB on there? I'm surprised this douche didn't throw Becker and Gilbert on there too.

Must have been written by some retard who thinks that Kurt Cobain is the greatest guitarist of all time.


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 13, 2013)

The author is a douche.


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 13, 2013)

ncfiala said:


> This list is ridiculous. Why are Malmsteem, Vai, _*EVH*_...



If he didn't sober up, I think EVH would fit in this list...


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## Alberto7 (Feb 14, 2013)

I wrote about 3 paragraphs slandering the author for the unspeakable amounts of bullshit he wrote down on that article, but I'll leave it at this: he just doesn't know what he's talking about.

Some were rightly included in the list, such as Malmsteen (whom I like anyway), that Esteban guy rofl:'d at that one), and even EVH, bu there were sooooo many better possible candidates that he didn't even mention (Dave Skankle being one of them).


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## Progfather (Feb 14, 2013)

Eddie is actually a nice guy. Really humble, but he is confident nevertheless. No idea why he's on there.


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## edsped (Feb 14, 2013)

Right when I read the part where he called John Mayer a "jazz shredder" I knew this was gonna be a terrible article.


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## abandonist (Feb 14, 2013)

I thought it was great.

Fuck every one of the people on this list.


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## JEngelking (Feb 14, 2013)

I've never even heard of Dave Shankle till you guys brought him up in this thread.


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## Sofos (Feb 14, 2013)

JEngelking said:


> I've never even heard of Dave Shankle till you guys brought him up in this thread.



http://www.sevenstring.org/forum/off-topic/154732-emg-has-black-listed-me.html

Enjoy


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## Alberto7 (Feb 14, 2013)

SoldiersOfFilth said:


> http://www.sevenstring.org/forum/off-topic/154732-emg-has-black-listed-me.html
> 
> Enjoy



Aahh, good times.


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## M3CHK1LLA (Feb 14, 2013)

apparently the author of this list is not aware of the man known as dave mustaine...


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## JEngelking (Feb 14, 2013)

Well, I just obtained many lulz reading through that thread. 

Verdict: Geez is that guy a fuck. 
That demonic solo video gave me cancerous epilepsy.


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## soliloquy (Feb 14, 2013)

i'm pretty sure the author has no idea what the word means.
batio for example maybe boring sounding as its just speed. however, he is one of the nicest guitarists out there right now. so he has talent, does that mean he's a douche?

i guess, from the authors definition, then the folks jonas brothers, or lil wayne have to be the best guitarists ever as they lack skill/talent, thus they cant really show off what they have. 


if, we go by the definition provided by the author, i'm really surprised that jason becker, jeff loomis, or even zack wylde aren't on that list.


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## Rojne (Feb 14, 2013)

damn.. if you look up the word "Douche" in the dictionary there would be 2 pictures showing..

One of Yngwie Malmsteen and one of Dave Shankle!


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## tm20 (Feb 14, 2013)

i should be no. 1 :|


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## BucketheadRules (Feb 14, 2013)

The writer of this article is ten times douchier than any of the guitarists on it.

There's this thing called "putting emotion into your playing" which sometimes entails the occasional (maybe even involuntary) funny face slipping into your stage routine. Trust me, Vai is not a dick. When I saw him he seemed very personable, down to earth and funny between songs, then proceeded to blow everyone's faces off in the actual songs. He makes the faces because, unlike many other shredders, he's putting some proper feeling into those notes.

It's impossible to take this list seriously.


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## Malkav (Feb 14, 2013)

Silly list is silly, the author is a pretty pathetic journalist as well seeing as he seems to have literally made certain things up to give credibility to his otherwise flawed viewpoint.

Also to those people saying Malmsteen is douche, much like Van Halen, now that he's sober he's apparently a really nice chilled dude  

As for Vai, the singer in my band recently spent some time overseas and got to see him live and after the show Vai went and thanked each person there personally for attending - What kind of douche does that?


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## Slunk Dragon (Feb 14, 2013)

Classifies John Mayer under "jazz".

Entire article still full of lulz. Pretty sure the guy is trolling, or he's proof why journalism is a horrible career.


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## TRENCHLORD (Feb 14, 2013)

With so many real putzs out there, why insult some truely amazing players?
Would be much more true and fun to make it; Biggest internet douch "guitarist/gear demo guys" of all time. (except that some of us would likely make the list lol).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4HaKBIaxU1k

or maybe this truely informative ass-essment
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfeWAjCML98


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## Yo_Wattup (Feb 14, 2013)

Malmsteen #9??? Whaaaaat? Vai #1? Whaaaaaaaaaaat??? They need the ol' switcharoo there IMO.


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 14, 2013)

Lol that David Shankle dude has blocked me on youtube. I just wanted to comment on this video:

David Shankle Insanely Amazing Demonic Guitar Solo video for the movie JEZEBETH Dean Guitars - YouTube!


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## Jakke (Feb 14, 2013)

I got a PM from him when I did it about a year ago, he shouldn't really be let anywhere near a key board. Strangely enogh, I'm not blocked... I was very polite though..


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## willis7452 (Feb 14, 2013)

Slash should be 1st, I've heard Steve is actually a really nice guy and Satch I'snt a douche! man this guy got this all wrong


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## GatherTheArsenal (Feb 14, 2013)

Fuck it, i'm gonna throw Stevie Ray Vaughn, Hendrix, Paco de Lucia, John McLaughlin, Al di Meola, Dimebag, and Petrucci in with the rest. They all make emotive faces when they play stuff... 

oh sorry what?? They have mad skills that most ppl can't reach?? Never mind that shit, what a bunch of douchey douche canoes!


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 14, 2013)

willis7452 said:


> Slash should be 1st, I've heard Steve is actually a really nice guy and Satch I'snt a douche! man this guy got this all wrong



In all fairness, Joe sueing Coldplay because of using the same chord progression and a similar melody was a douchey move. I didn't really expect that. I do hope Satch bought himself a nice car afterwards.


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## Jakke (Feb 14, 2013)

^People have sued and won for much less than that, it was pretty much an open-and-shut case

I also hope he bought himself a nice car, he should have nice things.


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## Demiurge (Feb 14, 2013)

The writer of the article is clearly stuck in 1993 when flashy guitar playing was the enemy. Then again, the inclusion of Rick Nielsen just makes me think that the writer may have just looked at pictures of everyone holding a guitar and passed judgement.  "OMG, none of these guys are in Pavement- douches!!!!"


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## jehu12141987 (Feb 14, 2013)

Can you say "EVH"?


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## will_shred (Feb 14, 2013)

No Dave Mustaine? Seriously? But Vai and Satch are on it? I've heard that they're both really nice guys. I mean I get that it was supposed to be funny but I really don't think those two really belong on that list.

I can't figure out for the life of me why Mustaine isn't on that list.


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## flypap3r (Feb 14, 2013)

Aren't we forgetting Mr. Scott Ian? He should be in the top 3 at least.


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## Loomer (Feb 14, 2013)

Say what you will about Mayer, but you can't knock his track record with the ladies.


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## flypap3r (Feb 14, 2013)

Loomer said:


> Say what you will about Mayer, but you can't knock his track record with the ladies.


 

Yea, he is the pied piper of pussy


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## Alberto7 (Feb 14, 2013)

BucketheadRules said:


> The writer of this article is ten times douchier than any of the guitarists on it.
> 
> There's this thing called "putting emotion into your playing" which sometimes entails the occasional (maybe even involuntary) funny face slipping into your stage routine. Trust me, Vai is not a dick. When I saw him he seemed very personable, down to earth and funny between songs, then proceeded to blow everyone's faces off in the actual songs. He makes the faces because, unlike many other shredders, he's putting some proper feeling into those notes.
> 
> It's impossible to take this list seriously.



That was actually the point of one of the paragraphs I wrote for my previous post but that I proceeded to delete. I attended one of Vai's Alien Guitar Secrets masterclasses in Europe a couple of years ago (Madrid, to be exact). It felt very personal, as there were only about 40-50 people in there. It was a lengthy event as well (3+ hours), so we got to really hear the guy talking, and we got to chat with him as well, and even improvise with him over a backing track that he had. Super nice dude, very polite, very easy to talk to, and EXTREMELY talented, passionate, and devoted towards what he does... to say the least. A bit flamboyant, yes , and certainly aware of what he's accomplished, but that's just how he is, and it certainly does NOT make him a a bad person.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

InfinityCollision said:


> Satch and Vai in the top 5? Huh?


The result of jealousy...


> John Mayer should've been higher and I see no mention of Maestro Alex Gregory!


The result of ign'ance... 



Jealousy and ignorance created that list.

Excuse me... Ign'ance...


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## RustInPeace (Feb 14, 2013)

No Ed Roman?


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

He plays guitar?

EDIT: Played*


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## bondmorkret (Feb 14, 2013)

Haha saw this the other day, I found it hilarious!


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## RustInPeace (Feb 14, 2013)

Too soon? What am I saying... Fuck Ed Roman.


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## drmosh (Feb 14, 2013)

The biggest douche here is the guy that wrote the article, he comes off as the biggest cock of all


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## M3CHK1LLA (Feb 14, 2013)

i'll just leave this here...


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## EMGguitarist (Feb 14, 2013)

I know someone else mentioned Becker and Gilbert, but I am especially surprised Gilbert didn't make it on here with his drill technique.

The magic starts at 6:28...


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## Esp Griffyn (Feb 14, 2013)

What a stupid article. If the writer had any journalistic integrity, or maybe just talent, they wouldn't be writing slanderous top 10 articles, purely to slate artists for a few cheap laughs.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

Playing a guitar with a drill seems more nerdy than douchey to me... But maybe I'm just a Gilbert fanboy...


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## InfinityCollision (Feb 14, 2013)

m3l-mrq3z said:


> In all fairness, Joe sueing Coldplay because of using the same chord progression and a similar melody was a douchey move.


What? Taking Satch's song, stripping out some of the melodic embellishments while maintaining the basic melody, progression, and harmonic rhythm, and then writing a song around it was the douchey move. Satch was entirely justified in suing them and it's not like he's the only one Coldplay has ripped off. Coldplay trying to blow him off when he filed the suit further cements their place as the douches in the instance.

I don't listen to either one but c'mon


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

Is this where the thread's going now? 

Why can't we just keep laughing at the guy that made the article?


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## hairychris (Feb 14, 2013)

I've only just read the Kankle thread. Fucking classic, what a complete cock. 

But yeah. No Mustaine? No Nugent????

Fail.


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## BucketheadRules (Feb 14, 2013)

Esp Griffyn said:


> What a stupid article. If the writer had any journalistic integrity, or maybe just talent, they wouldn't be writing slanderous top 10 articles, purely to slate artists for a few cheap laughs.



Even if he was intending to get some cheap laughs he failed, because that article was about as funny as terminal cancer.



hairychris said:


> No Mustaine? No Nugent????
> 
> Fail.



This - although it isn't their guitar playing that makes them douches, it's the paranoid bullshit of the politics they support.

The biggest douches in the guitar-o-sphere are, for my money, the unprofessional tossers you try and start bands with who don't learn their material, don't play it very well and don't make an effort to improve - the ones who just couldn't give two shits about what they're meant to be doing. And ones who play in between songs when people are trying to talk. Absolute bellends.

Those are the douchebags, not Steve Vai. Being a good guitar player doesn't automatically make you a douche.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

BucketheadRules said:


> Being a good guitar player doesn't automatically make you a douche.



It does if the observer has a mouthful of sour grapes...


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## leechmasterargentina (Feb 14, 2013)

*3. Michael Angelo Batio

*


> The next time you wanna laugh hysterically, check out the guitarists series of instructional DVDs called _Speed Kills_ which also doubles as a manual on how to look like you just stepped off the Sunset Strip in 1984.


Heheh..





> I'm going to give YOU the keys to the Lamborghini


That phrase is awesome hahahah! He's a douchemeister


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## ToMurderAMachine (Feb 14, 2013)

Where's Synyster Gates?


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

MAB is awesome... I'm sorry. His ridiculousness makes me happy.


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## mwcarl (Feb 14, 2013)

Pretentious != Douche

Some valid criticisms though, but not really douches.


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## leechmasterargentina (Feb 14, 2013)

*Douchebag Maestro Alex Gregory* is missing on that list. I think he earned his title with great effort.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

You can be pretentious w/o being a douche? I must learn how.


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## Jakke (Feb 14, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> You can be pretentious w/o being a douche? I must learn how.



I too am interested in knowing about this mythical creature.


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## groverj3 (Feb 14, 2013)

I'll buy Yngwie and EVH being douches, but just because someone plays self-indulgently does not make them one.

MAB is about as self-indulgent as they come as far as playing, but when I met the guy he didn't seem like a jerk.

Satch? Vai? Really?

Put Dave Mustaine on this list . Too douchey and drugged up for Metallica. That's a pretty big accomplishment. (Note: I like Megadeth)


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## XEN (Feb 14, 2013)

The whole thing was just a series of cheap shots against '80s era shredders, and the ludicrous theatrics they had to indulge their hairspray infested crowds with just to sell concert tickets, with Mayer thrown in for jealousy toward his sheer pussy magnetism.

Pure elitist, generation Z, hipster bullshit written with no clue as to what the word, 'douche,' even means.


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## Deadfall (Feb 14, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> MAB is awesome... I'm sorry. His ridiculousness makes me happy.


 Yeah man the guy can play. But I cant get past the hair haha. We played a show somewhere in charlotte nc years ago with them (nitro) on the bill. He walked up to the bar afterwards and I wanted to say hello,good show,or something y'know? But I just had to walk away for fear of him kicking my ass for laughing.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

Yea his hair does look pretty crazy.

I really don't like shaking shredders' hands anyway. DEATH GRIP every time.



> What is this? Job security? Bitch I need my hands too!


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## matt397 (Feb 14, 2013)

There are way bigger douche bag musicians out there then are on that list. It's not that I can't find humor in this, god only knows how little class I have lol, it's just that it was poorly thought out and not very well written.


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## redskyharbor (Feb 14, 2013)

This list should be reserved for anyone who wears sunglasses indoors.


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## Draceius (Feb 14, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Yea his hair does look pretty crazy.



Crazy? The man has one of the worst mullets in history, amazing guitarist and really nice person, but wow, I can't help but cringe.

Oh and +1 to mustaine, for a being a douche and a bigot, this list was terrible written and oddly hilarious.


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 14, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> MAB is awesome... I'm sorry. His ridiculousness makes me happy.



You're just mad because he didn't gave you the keys to the Lamborghini.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

I'm not sure I know the joke ab the Lamborghini...


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 14, 2013)

^Watch the video, son.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

Will do when I get home. On bus w no headphones. Ppl get pissy.


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 14, 2013)

Don't be a conformist. Trust me on this one.


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## leechmasterargentina (Feb 14, 2013)

Draceius said:


> Crazy? The man has one of the worst mullets in history, amazing guitarist and really nice person, but wow, I can't help but cringe.
> 
> Oh and +1 to mustaine, for a being a douche and a bigot, this list was terrible written and oddly hilarious.




I thought that was Gregg Bissonette:


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## Jakke (Feb 14, 2013)

m3l-mrq3z said:


> Don't be a conformist. Trust me on this one.




Difference between being a conformist and showing common courtesy


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

Conformist? Is Warrel Dane in the room?



Warrel said:


> CONSUME!! CONFORM!!


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## Jakke (Feb 14, 2013)

He's everywhere, he also knows what you did last night.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)




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## kylendm (Feb 14, 2013)

When I met Vai he was a super cool guy, we talked about his performances, guitars, and recording. He never sounded like he was better than me or anyone just a really cool nice guy. 

I think his faces and "emotional" playing are just thing's he does because I think he's just proud of what he's accomplished. If I had his skill and worked as hard as he did everyday to be as good as he is I'd probably be doing the same stuff he is.


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## Jakke (Feb 14, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


>




Exactly


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

kylendm said:


> When I met Vai he was a super cool guy, we talked about his performances, guitars, and recording. He never sounded like he was better than me or anyone just a really cool nice guy.
> 
> I think his faces and "emotional" playing are just thing's he does because I think he's just proud of what he's accomplished. If I had his skill and worked as hard as he did everyday to be as good as he is I'd probably be doing the same stuff he is.



I bought the version of Story of Light that came w the DVD. He says he can't help the faces. We've seen plenty of nameless and amazing players do the same thing. Haters gon' hate.

There's some dude floating around YouTube. Does 2 handed tapping all day long and the faces he makes literally make it look like he may have a mental disability. Maybe that's just what happens when your brain has to focus that much energy on one muscle or subset of them. The rest kinda go a little crazy...?

Ya know like the faces ppl make when they're fucking...


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## groverj3 (Feb 14, 2013)

What about Jon Schaffer of Iced Earth. I've always imagined he must be rough to work with since he can't manage to keep the same lineup together for more than 6 months at a time .

No idea if he's actually a jerk or not.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

Somehow he's the nicest guy ever and just not punctual.


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## GXPO (Feb 14, 2013)

People who don't get Vai  Where did the idea that Steve Vai is arrogant come from?


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## tedtan (Feb 14, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> I bought the version of Story of Light that came w the DVD. He says he can't help the faces. We've seen plenty of nameless and amazing players do the same thing. Haters gon' hate.
> 
> There's some dude floating around YouTube. Does 2 handed tapping all day long and the faces he makes literally make it look like he may have a mental disability. Maybe that's just what happens when your brain has to focus that much energy on one muscle or subset of them. The rest kinda go a little crazy...?
> 
> Ya know like the faces ppl make when they're fucking...


 
I'm a nobody and even I make stupid faces unconsciously when I play. I never noticed it until I saw pics/video, but I'll be dmaned if I wasn't doing it. And keep the wah away from me if you don't want to see weird faces! 

But if you ever saw me playing a show without the faces, it was probably because I was sick or w/e and didn't want to be there.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 14, 2013)

I do it to. I lip sync as if I'm singing along or something... Or certain notes feel a certain way and my body just naturally will want to move a certain way as a result. 

The faces--to me--just mean you're into it. And if you aren't, why do it?


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## tedtan (Feb 14, 2013)

^ Exactly!


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## Overtone (Feb 14, 2013)

Apparently having technique and using it is a douchey thing to do...


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## Danukenator (Feb 14, 2013)

MAB is a douche?!? He gave a clinic at a tiny local shop and the nicest and most humble guy. He tends to put on a fake "heavy metal" persona but you'd have to be pretty stupid to not understand it's a joke.

IMO this guy wrote this article to give people a link to shoot around in e-wars.


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## JEngelking (Feb 14, 2013)

leechmasterargentina said:


> *3. Michael Angelo Batio
> 
> *Heheh..
> 
> ...




Every time I see that video, the guitar he plays in the shot immediately after he says that line makes me think of a can of Mountain Dew...


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## xCaptainx (Feb 14, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> There's some dude floating around YouTube. Does 2 handed tapping all day long and the faces he makes literally make it look like he may have a mental disability.



Adam Fulara. I watch his videos every now and then when I need a giggle  Love his faces.


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## 1968 Charger B5 (Feb 14, 2013)

I maybe agreed with most of the artists...the order I may have changed though. lol


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## guitarfreak1387 (Feb 14, 2013)

And Dave Mustaine didnt make the list? guess asshole is not interchangeable with douche


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## 1968 Charger B5 (Feb 14, 2013)

Man....I am such a HUGE Mustaine fan....but it is hard to argue that he has not been as asshole. However the title did say "douchiest" just sayn


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## Jzbass25 (Feb 14, 2013)

redskyharbor said:


> This list should be reserved for anyone who wears sunglasses indoors.



Heyyy, I wear sunglasses indoors! But only because I have horrible chronic migraines and I have light sensitivity. 

Also I dont understand this list, I've met a few of the guitarists on this list, MAB, satch and Vai and none of them were douchey. MAB makes me laugh though, he is such a guitar nerd.


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## sleightest (Feb 14, 2013)

I think VAI is a nice guy and a good person, probably my favorite guitarist of all time but based on looks alone though, yeah he looks like a huge douche. But I mean when you are that good at instrumental guitar you kinda gotta be the showman/center of attention. I think Malmsteen should be #1 because he is actually pretty self centered irl from what ive heard. Vai is a genuinely nice guy and that's minus 10 douche points even if he dresses like Bono on acid, whispers into his guitar and o faces the audience constantly.


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## Orsinium (Feb 14, 2013)

I like how he chose certain people just because of the faces they make if thats the case a lot of blues and jazz players are douche's I guess. Although some people on the list are actual douches though I just figured he could replace the funny face players with douches.


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## Don Vito (Feb 15, 2013)

redskyharbor said:


> This list should be reserved for anyone who wears sunglasses indoors.


Why did you have to remind me of this shit(skip to 3:55).


In fact, the whole video is an insult to music.


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## BucketheadRules (Feb 15, 2013)

Also, why the fuck is Rick Nielsen up there? He had a guitar with five necks... so fucking what? That's showmanship, not "over-compensating".

If having more than one neck on your guitar makes you a douche, where was Jimmy Page?


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## Loomer (Feb 15, 2013)

This thread is now about which one of the women John Mayer has banged you'd choose for yourself. 

As for me, I'm pretty torn between Tay-Tay Swiff and Katy Perry, but leaning mostly towards Katy.


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## Malkav (Feb 15, 2013)

Loomer said:


> As for me, I'm pretty torn between Tay-Tay Swiff and Katy Perry, but leaning mostly towards Katy.


 
Agreed!

I don't know why, but to me Katy Perry is just on a crazy other level of yes please!


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## Loomer (Feb 15, 2013)

Oh, the motorboating.. THE MOTORBOATING!!!


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## hairychris (Feb 15, 2013)

Soiled by Russell Brand...


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## Minoin (Feb 15, 2013)

Just got to know David Skankle.. Had quite a laugh


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## BucketheadRules (Feb 15, 2013)

Loomer said:


> This thread is now about which one of the women John Mayer has banged you'd choose for yourself.
> 
> As for me, I'm pretty torn between Tay-Tay Swiff and Katy Perry, but leaning mostly towards Katy.



I Googled and apparently he's dated Kim Kardashian.

Can't stand her or the trashy pop-culture bullshit she stands for, but she is unbelievably hot. Fair play to him...


----------



## 1968 Charger B5 (Feb 15, 2013)

Yngwie is def a douche.......end of story no matter how good he is. He is VERY self-centered


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 15, 2013)

In recent years, I think he's calmed down a bit. He did a rig rundown awhile back for PremierGuitar and he doesn't seem as much of an asshole.


----------



## Jakke (Feb 15, 2013)

Well, except him piling all his vintage strats in a heap along one of his walls


----------



## ghostred7 (Feb 15, 2013)

Malmsteen actually is a douche. I met him once in Va Beach....total tool.


----------



## abandonist (Feb 15, 2013)

Loomer said:


> This thread is now about which one of the women John Mayer has banged you'd choose for yourself.
> 
> As for me, I'm pretty torn between Tay-Tay Swiff and Katy Perry, but leaning mostly towards Katy.



Jennifer Love Hewitt.


----------



## jimwratt (Feb 15, 2013)

With the exception of CC Deville, John Mayer, and Esteban, the list could also double as top 10 most well known high-skill guitarists. I always wonder with lists like these who they would offer up as top 10 non-douchey guitarists?


My list is as follows:

Zakk Wylde
Kirk Hammett
James Hetfield
Alex Gregory
Dave Mustaine
Synyster Gates or however the hell he spells his name
Jack White
The Edge
Matthew Bellamy
TED NUGENT


----------



## Chuck (Feb 15, 2013)

silly list


----------



## Konfyouzd (Feb 15, 2013)

xCaptainx said:


> Adam Fulara. I watch his videos every now and then when I need a giggle  Love his faces.


Administering now...



God... What a douche...


----------



## ilyti (Feb 15, 2013)

John Mayer is the definition of douche. A douche (imo) is a very specific kind of asshole. Namely, a moocher, a flatterer, and someone absolutely obsessed with fitting in, and being "hardcore". A douche will do anything to be viewed as "cool." They are incredibly image conscious, and often use the expressions YOLO and SWAG. Douches are also extremely vain and they spend ridiculous amounts of money on brand name clothes and hours on their stupid hair. They are also completely unaware of the fact that they are a laughing stock and nobody really respects them.

Yngwie is just an egomaniac who loves classical music. Satch is as boring a human being as you can get in a shredder, Vai is a god among men who is also incredibly humble. He just chooses to be childlike and flamboyant in his approach to music, and there's nothing wrong with that. As far away from douche as is humanly possible, so being #1 on that list makes all credibility go out the window. In conclusion, sod that list.


----------



## Jakke (Feb 15, 2013)

The only bad thing I have to say about John Mayer is that his music is cheesy, I have not met him, so I can't comment on his character.


----------



## xCaptainx (Feb 15, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Administering now...
> 
> 
> 
> God... What a douche...






WAY better example here, haha. 

Awesome playing through.


----------



## kung_fu (Feb 15, 2013)

Why haven't I ever noticed that MAB is wearing a "Gold's Gym" shirt in that video before. This man might have invented the ironic T-shirt


----------



## Choop (Feb 15, 2013)

I really dunno why people hate on Steve Vai's faces he makes while he plays. To me it just seems like he's having a blast and is really into it, and he's a great show-man, same with Satch. Dumb list is dumb. -.-


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 15, 2013)

Steve Vai is constantly orgasming when he plays.


----------



## Choop (Feb 15, 2013)

m3l-mrq3z said:


> Steve Vai is constantly orgasming when he plays.



That too.


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 15, 2013)

m3l-mrq3z said:


> Steve Vai is constantly orgasming when he plays.


----------



## GSingleton (Feb 15, 2013)

Terrible article....done


----------



## GatherTheArsenal (Feb 16, 2013)

We need a list of the top 10 funny and peculiar faces guitarists make or have made, so that we can turn them into funny memes..... 

...wow do i ever feel like such a product of the digital age.

I vote in the man himself, the Vaughan and only (see what I did there?), Stevie Ray Vaughan. Look at that kisser.


----------



## Nag (Feb 16, 2013)

this list is bullshit IMO. You may not like some of the guys on the list for some reason, they bashed some of the hardest working guitarists ever. Van Halen, Satriani, Steve Vai, Malmsteen, MAB and I'll even add John Mayer have been working their asses off for ages to become as technically good as they are. You may not like their music, I don't like most of them, but they ARE good. The list basically just disrespects skill.

This list should feature buttheads like Lil Wayne instead.


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 16, 2013)

HeHasTheJazzHands said:


>



He is like "yeah, bitch!"

Another "douchey" guy, known for epic guitar faces: Mr Pat Metheny:






Love Pat, but he looks like he's in terrible gastrointestinal pain on this picture.


----------



## Robinho (Feb 16, 2013)

If it was named "guitarists that pull stupid douchey faces whilst spraying the faces of onlookers with monk fish jelly and golden rays of shred, wank off/wank on style" then sure, goodlist. But saying they are douches is just a sign of being a sour douche.........


----------



## jimwratt (Feb 16, 2013)

I've actually met John Mayer and Steve Vai, they were very humble and unassuming. 

I want to point out that this list was published in the Village Voice, which is where I'd expect to see an album review of how MGMT are the biggest musical geniuses since Mozart. They're much more hipster-friendly than any of us would be comfortable with, but their list was still funny.


----------



## jephjacques (Feb 16, 2013)

This kind of article exists solely to drive pageviews and ad revenue. Buzzfeed-level content-farm garbage.

I've heard horror stories about trying to work with Malmsteen, and everybody knows Mayer is the douchiest man in the music business right now, but Vai and Satriani have always seemed like pretty nice guys, self-indulgent or not.

Gotta admit I'm surprised Mustaine and Nugent didn't make the list, they're both awful in so many ways.


----------



## groph (Feb 16, 2013)

I think artistic expression carries with it a responsibility of humility. Although, this is not to say a guitarist is a douchebag because they recognize their level of technical skill. I don't think it's a dick move to say "I'm a skilled guitar player" if you indeed have been playing for years and have the experience. It's a different matter to say "I'm the best guitarist ever, I singlehandedly revolutionized crabcoar." I'd say 'ol Devy Townsend certainly deserves to not be on this list, he's an example of what I'm talking about.





NET WORTH OF THIS POST = $0.02


----------



## Loomer (Feb 16, 2013)

abandonist said:


> Jennifer Love Hewitt.



Shit, he nailed her too? Goddamn, that guy is unstoppable.


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 16, 2013)

Fuck metal. I am becoming a blues douche.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 16, 2013)

Loomer said:


> Shit, he nailed her too? Goddamn, that guy is unstoppable.



Don't forget Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, Cameron Diaz, Minka Kelly, Rhona Mitra... Can you blame the guy for having the huge ego? 

As for the list... Total bullshit!


----------



## Andromalia (Feb 16, 2013)

I fully expected Dave Mustaine as #1.


----------



## Dayn (Feb 16, 2013)

Choop said:


> I really dunno why people hate on Steve Vai's faces he makes while he plays. To me it just seems like he's having a blast and is really into it, and he's a great show-man, same with Satch. Dumb list is dumb. -.-


This. When I saw Vai last year at G3, he apologised before he started. ...Because he said he was about to explode with excitement and make a mess all over the stage.

He then proceeded to explode. And the mess was enjoyable. Not just music, but a damn good performance, too.


----------



## thedonal (Feb 16, 2013)

While I agree with some on the list (Malmsteen and MAB seems like a bit of a dick, for all his skill), Satch, EVH and Vai? Fuck off.

What does this cunt normally listen too? Kenny G and Simply Red? Fucking journalists. 

Incidentally, I've sunk a bottle of wine and and am now on cognac. And in a really good mood otherwise. 

edit- more smiley added to take the edge off the language- was written with a smile on my face, rather than anger (well not much anger, anyways!). I just don't see how you could at least call Satch and Vai douches... And yes- I expected Mustaine to be high on the list, if not mentioned.


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 16, 2013)

thedonal said:


> While I agree with some on the list (Malmsteen and MAB seems like a bit of a dick, for all his skill), Satch, EVH and Vai? Fuck off.
> 
> What does this cunt normally listen too? Kenny G and Simply Red? Fucking journalists.
> 
> ...



Same here, sir.


----------



## thedonal (Feb 16, 2013)

Good man! I'm riding high on Pixar movies- perhaps that was armour against the article (the comments on the site seem to cover it too!).

It's like it's been written by someone who knows nothing about music/musicianship (or or self editing). It doesn't really show enough intelligence to be baiting the fans....


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 16, 2013)

I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume Pauly D is the actual author of that article/list.


----------



## datalore (Feb 16, 2013)

Steve Vai is an appropriate number one. This douche is conspiciously absent from the list:


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 16, 2013)

datalore said:


>



I've never heard of Tremonti being a douche. Well, besides being in Creed...


----------



## SnowfaLL (Feb 17, 2013)

How is MAB not #1?? that guy is the definition of douche.

I disagree with Vai being on there too, his over-expression and wonky attitude plays into his personality, he doesnt take himself seriously like MAB and Yngwie does. Thats what seperates the two. Vai knows everything he does is a joke, while MAB thinks he seriously is the coolest guy in the world (and thinking hes the fastest guitarist in the world lol)


----------



## thesnowdog (Feb 17, 2013)

Loomer said:


> This thread is now about which one of the women John Mayer has banged you'd choose for yourself.
> 
> As for me, I'm pretty torn between Tay-Tay Swiff and Katy Perry, but leaning mostly towards Katy.



Minka Kelly


----------



## datalore (Feb 17, 2013)

HeHasTheJazzHands said:


> I've never heard of Tremonti being a douche. Well, besides being in Creed...



There's that, and also a lot of stupid shit like this:


----------



## donray1527 (Feb 17, 2013)

MAB is definitely not a douche. I have met him a few times and he is one of the nicest guys. But rusty Cooley is a huge dick lol he should be on this list.


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 17, 2013)

datalore said:


> There's that, and also a lot of stupid shit like this:




Look at how tensioned his arms are. No wonder dude looks strong.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 17, 2013)

datalore said:


> Steve Vai is an appropriate number one. This douche is conspiciously absent from the list:



Actually, I couldn't think of a guitarist farther from being a douche. He always comes across as a genuinely nice and down-to-earth person who is extremely passionate about music. And when we spoke with him after his solo show in AL last year, he was beyond friendly and loved to just talk about guitars.

But I guess you consider him douche just for being extremely successful and an accomplished musician.


----------



## thesnowdog (Feb 17, 2013)

blacksgslayer said:


> MAB is definitely not a douche.



My impression has always been that he's rather 'sweet'.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 17, 2013)

thesnowdog said:


> My impression has always been that he's rather 'sweet'.



Yeah he has always seemed really nice. Goofy hair and cheesy guitar schtick aside, he seems like a good guy. Would not call him a douche at all.


----------



## Blake1970 (Feb 17, 2013)

Zakk Wylde


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 17, 2013)

Blake1970 said:


> Zakk Wylde



If by Zakk Wylde you mean Gus G, then yes.


----------



## drmosh (Feb 17, 2013)

s_k_mullins said:


> Yeah he has always seemed really nice. Goofy hair and cheesy guitar schtick aside, he seems like a good guy. Would not call him a douche at all.



I spoke with him at a clinic once like 20 years ago, he's a really nice guy.


----------



## datalore (Feb 17, 2013)

s_k_mullins said:


> But I guess you consider him douche just for being extremely successful and an accomplished musician.



No, I consider him a douche because his stage presence is cheesy and his playing is lame.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 17, 2013)

datalore said:


> No, I consider him a douche because his stage presence is cheesy and his playing is lame.



First, what stage presence? He has no flamboyant persona, no stage antics, no real guitar stunts. He looks like an average guy in jeans and tshirt just playing his best. He inspires plenty of players. 

And his playing... Lame? Really? I think what you really mean is that you just are not a fan of Tremonti. And you automatically call a player you don't like "lame", which makes you look like a pretentious music snob.

EDIT: and yes, I'm a Tremonti fan. I enjoy his solo album and his work with AlterBridge. He's a solid player and nice guy and I respect him.


----------



## datalore (Feb 17, 2013)

s_k_mullins said:


> First, what stage presence? He has no flamboyant persona, no stage antics, no real guitar stunts. He looks like an average guy in jeans and tshirt just playing his best. He inspires plenty of players.
> 
> And his playing... Lame? Really? I think what you really mean is that you just are not a fan of Tremonti. And you automatically call a player you don't like "lame", which makes you look like a pretentious music snob.



I'm just stating my opinions here. If you don't think he is a douche, so be it.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 17, 2013)

datalore said:


> I'm just stating my opinions here. If you don't think he is a douche, so be it.



I know you are, dude. I don't mean disrespect, I was just curious as to why you had that opinion. 

I'm sure I would not like all the guitarists you like either 

EDIT: And I apologize for the tone of my previous post.


----------



## GalacticDeath (Feb 17, 2013)

I'd say Tosin Abasi is the douchiest


























jk


----------



## datalore (Feb 17, 2013)

Blake1970 said:


> Zakk Wylde



Yes, this. Kind of a shame, because he was great as a young player.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 17, 2013)

datalore said:


> Yes, this. Kind of a shame, because he was great as a young player.



I enjoy Zakk's playing. I could listen to him shred pentatonics all day. But unfortunately, the whole Viking biker persona gets old after a while.


----------



## InfinityCollision (Feb 17, 2013)

datalore said:


> No, I consider him a douche because his stage presence is cheesy and his playing is lame.



How does any of that fit under "douche"?


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 17, 2013)

datalore said:


> There's that, and also a lot of stupid shit like this:



Aaaaaaaand?

I don't see any stage monitors being thrown or glasses of water being tossed at cameramen.


----------



## tedtan (Feb 17, 2013)

InfinityCollision said:


> How does any of that fit under "douche"?


 
Exactly.

datalore is entitled to his own opinion here, but he seems to be using a different definition of the term douche than everyone else in the English speaking world.


----------



## zero_end (Feb 18, 2013)

Besides of the douchebag that wrote the article, lots of folks here calling other guitarists douchebags because of their facial expressions? (joke or otherwise)

Pot, kettle, black, helloooo!!!!


----------



## abandonist (Feb 18, 2013)

Just let the list be funny. 

Y'all are acting like they cussed out your mom.


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 18, 2013)

Not really much humor in that article. 

"LOL THIS GUY MAKES A FUNNY FACE. LOL THIS GUY PLAYS A 5-STRING GUITAR. THEY MUST BE TOTAL DOOSHNOZZLES."


----------



## abandonist (Feb 18, 2013)

SRS BSNS


----------



## Loomer (Feb 18, 2013)

I guess the thing with Tremonti is, that he played in a band with Scott Stapp, and people expect Stapp's weapons-grade douchebaggery to be contagious.


----------



## Draceius (Feb 18, 2013)

Loomer said:


> I guess the thing with Tremonti is, that he played in a band with Scott Stapp, and people expect Stapp's weapons-grade douchebaggery to be contagious.



This is sig worthy, made me laugh way harder than it should of


----------



## tedtan (Feb 18, 2013)

Point taken, Loomer. Point taken.


----------



## UV7BK4LIFE (Feb 18, 2013)

This list is so typical of the MTV induced culture where looks and image are more important than the music you play. 

To the writer of that article: 

Okay, some of them may seem arrogant personalities but when you can play like that you have the right to be proud of yourself and what you've achieved.


----------



## Riffer (Feb 18, 2013)

datalore said:


> No, I consider him a douche because his stage presence is cheesy and his playing is lame.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 18, 2013)

Loomer said:


> I guess the thing with Tremonti is, that he played in a band with Scott Stapp, and people expect Stapp's weapons-grade douchebaggery to be contagious.



Yeah, I literally LOL'd at that one. Stapp does come off like an enormous douche.


----------



## abandonist (Feb 18, 2013)

Are people defending something associated with Creed in here?


----------



## Riffer (Feb 18, 2013)

abandonist said:


> Are people defending something associated with Creed in here?



Yes. As someone who has met Mark numerous times at my job, he is the coolest and nicest guy you could imagine. He will talk to you forever about metal and gear. Also, when I was 12 I liked Creed. There are some cool riffs in some of their stuff.


----------



## abandonist (Feb 19, 2013)

I don't give two tiny fucks if he's "nice". He's responsible for music that is irredeemable garbage. The two don't equalize.


----------



## Alberto7 (Feb 19, 2013)

abandonist said:


> I don't give two tiny fucks if he's "nice". He's responsible for music that is irredeemable garbage. The two don't equalize.



I don't think you've ever heard of opinions. "Irredeemable" is an absolute qualifier, and it's better left unused.


----------



## abandonist (Feb 19, 2013)

My opinion is reality to me. 

I'm not going to say "In My Opinion" after every single thing I write. I wrote it. It's clearly my opinion. Don't be looking for a reason to get outraged.

Mark Tremonti still sucks.


----------



## Alberto7 (Feb 19, 2013)

Fine.


----------



## Jzbass25 (Feb 19, 2013)

I would have probably started a literal riot if the article said Jason Becker as any number on the list.


----------



## flint757 (Feb 19, 2013)

s_k_mullins said:


> Actually, I couldn't think of a guitarist farther from being a douche. He always comes across as a genuinely nice and down-to-earth person who is extremely passionate about music. And when we spoke with him after his solo show in AL last year, he was beyond friendly and loved to just talk about guitars.
> 
> But I guess you consider him douche just for being extremely successful and an accomplished musician.



I definitely see a lot of reactionary comments. If people can definitively believe that Satch and Vai are not douche bags then calling Mayer and Tremonti douche bags is just as untrue if using similar qualifiers. Being famous, talented and/or good with women hardly makes someone a douche. From what I've read outside the stage Mayer is a bit of a homebody. 



abandonist said:


> My opinion is reality to me.
> 
> I'm not going to say "In My Opinion" after every single thing I write. I wrote it. It's clearly my opinion. Don't be looking for a reason to get outraged.
> 
> Mark Tremonti still sucks.



Ahhh, but some things are fact and some things aren't. We have writing conventions for a reason otherwise communicating in the world would be significantly less efficient and complicated.


----------



## abandonist (Feb 19, 2013)

It's really happening. 

You guys are defending Mark Tremonti. 

I hate all of you.


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 19, 2013)




----------



## Dayviewer (Feb 19, 2013)

I actually like all of Tremonti's stuff.
And yes, that also includes Creed.
.......





Though I can see why people don't like Creed, let me just say that  Tremonti is legit though, met him once, really humble guy.


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 19, 2013)

Creed's songwriting > Animals as Leader's songwriting.


----------



## Experimorph (Feb 19, 2013)

m3l-mrq3z said:


> Creed's songwriting > Animals as Leader's songwriting.



Wait a minute, peeps, I need to run for the popcorn!

Anyway, it seems the author is not using the word "douche" in the right context at all. He's basically listing technically gifted players who know how to put up a show and deliver for the money.

Not having read all of the pages, I can't say if that's been mentioned already.


----------



## Draceius (Feb 19, 2013)

Experimorph said:


> Wait a minute, peeps, I need to run for the popcorn!
> 
> Anyway, it seems the author is not using the word "douche" in the right context at all. He's basically listing technically gifted players who know how to put up a show and deliver for the money.
> 
> Not having read all of the pages, I can't say if that's been mentioned already.



You should read all the pages, they're hilarious and that has been said before.


----------



## Riffer (Feb 19, 2013)

abandonist said:


> It's really happening.
> 
> You guys are defending Mark Tremonti.
> 
> I hate all of you.


 
I think you're missing the point a little. The definition of a douche is is basically a jerk or someone with a huge ego and is rude. Mark is the exact opposite if that. You can hate his playing, music, the way he stands on stage, his normal guy stage attire, etc. But to label him a douche is actually 100% wrong in every aspect.


----------



## abandonist (Feb 19, 2013)

I'm not participating anymore.

I've lost some amount of faith in the world.


----------



## s_k_mullins (Feb 19, 2013)

I'm pretty sure *abandonist* is the guy who wrote the article. They have very similar tactics for labeling douches. 

"OMG I hate this guy's music. He is a douche for not being exactly who I want him to be. And I hate these cookies. They're douches because I hate the way they taste."


----------



## JEngelking (Feb 19, 2013)




----------



## Jakke (Feb 19, 2013)

abandonist said:


> It's really happening.
> 
> You guys are defending Mark Tremonti.
> 
> I hate all of you.










I can't see how the reasoning "these guys defends a guy I don't like -> I hate those guys" is valid. I don't think Tremonti is a douche either, he might have been extremely cheesy in Creed, but Alter Bridge rocks really hard. "Douche" also implies personal qualities that I simply cannot assume about him, because I have never met the guy.


----------



## Riffer (Feb 19, 2013)

abandonist said:


> I'm not participating anymore.
> 
> I've lost some amount of faith in the world.


----------



## datalore (Feb 19, 2013)

tedtan said:


> Exactly.
> 
> datalore is entitled to his own opinion here, but he seems to be using a different definition of the term douche than everyone else in the English speaking world.



Here's a definition from Urban Dictionary that fits my intended meaning:

An individual who has an over-inflated sense of self worth, compounded by a low level of intellegence, behaving ridiculously in front of colleagues with no sense of how moronic he appears. 

First, I think we can all acknowledge that Creed is one of the most annoying bands ever. Mark Tremonti willingly participated in and contributed to Creed's music. That's a pretty serious strike against him. Second, I would argue that it takes a pretty serious ego and a lack of wisdom to be able to play the kind of sloppy, mindless shred garbage that Mark Tremonti spews out in the clip that I posted. Many guitarists are capable of that kind of douchebaggery, and Mark Tremonti is one of them.

I think it's ironic that people will call Steve Vai a douchebag, yet defend players like Mark Tremonti. Steve's stage image is very cheesy and very dated, but he is a great musician, a great teacher, and a great person. He also worked with Frank Zappa, David Lee Roth, and Devin Townsend, not Scott Stapp.


----------



## InfinityCollision (Feb 19, 2013)

Has any one person in this thread actually called Vai a douche _and_ defended Tremonti, or are you conflating arguments?


Jakke said:


>


That is amazing


----------



## Alberto7 (Feb 19, 2013)

This thread... woooo ... 

*unsubscribes*


----------



## hairychris (Feb 19, 2013)

Back on track.

Can we call Durst a guitarist? If so.....

Also, any naming/shaming of idiots on your local scene? I imagine that most of us have stories of guitarists thinking that they own the universe after having played in front of 3 men and a dog.

(And as someone who's not into Tremonti's music I've only heard good things about him as a bloke. As I have no idea who Stapp is I think that I may have ducked one there. Vai... was a wee bit of a "rock star" back in the day but never to The Yng's level.  )


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 19, 2013)




----------



## Jakke (Feb 19, 2013)

hairychris said:


> (And as someone who's not into Tremonti's music I've only heard good things about him as a bloke. *As I have no idea who Stapp* is I think that I may have ducked one there. Vai... was a wee bit of a "rock star" back in the day but never to The Yng's level.  )








You did indeed dodge a bullet there.. He do have a massive yarl though, such a shame that only Eddie Vedder and Layne Staley has been able to pull it off and make it sound genuine.


----------



## Dayviewer (Feb 19, 2013)

*Stapp picture enters thread*

Now it's really time to abandon


----------



## GuitaristOfHell (Feb 19, 2013)

Guy seems like a troll honestly.


----------



## sylcfh (Feb 19, 2013)

Satriani isn't the king of 80's cheese, that's Steve Lukather, and he isn't douchey at all.


----------



## Riffer (Feb 19, 2013)

sylcfh said:


> Satriani isn't the king of 80's cheese, that's Steve Lukather, and he isn't douchey at all.


 I love Steve Lukather! Dude has some tasty riffs.


----------



## donray1527 (Feb 19, 2013)

I don't know where you guys got that Steve via is a great person. I've always heard that he's a dick


----------



## Jzbass25 (Feb 19, 2013)

If we can call fred durst a guitarist then can we also cal lil wayne a guitarist? haha



blacksgslayer said:


> I don't know where you guys got that Steve via is a great person. I've always heard that he's a dick



I met the damn guy and I was humbled just being around him. I think your information is coming from people that either hate him and/or haven't met him


----------



## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 19, 2013)

blacksgslayer said:


> I don't know where you guys got that Steve via is a great person. I've always heard that he's a dick



You talk to the wrong people. 

Every interview I've seen and every person I've talked to that met him says he's a very nice, humble, and pretty funny guy.


----------



## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 19, 2013)

HeHasTheJazzHands said:


>




Sounds better than most of the stuff Metallica has released in the last years.


----------



## Watty (Feb 19, 2013)

HeHasTheJazzHands said:


> Every interview I've seen and every person I've talked to that met him says he's a very nice, humble, and pretty funny guy.



You forgot pretentious.


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## Jzbass25 (Feb 19, 2013)

Watty said:


> You forgot pretentious.



I don't think I'd call him pretentious either, he doesn't try and claim to be something that he's not. He knows that he appeals mainly to guitarists and even though he has his wild wacky steve vai shiny clothes and guitars style I wouldn't call it pretentious, maybe gaudy... but I mean cmon he's italian and from the 80s


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## Jakke (Feb 19, 2013)

I think flamboyant might be the right word


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## Jzbass25 (Feb 19, 2013)

Jakke said:


> I think flamboyant might be the right word



There's the word I couldn't think up! Stupid aphasia (a word I can think of while having aphasia... how's that work?) 

I would say flamboyant is exactly correct, but Vai admits to it.


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## Loomer (Feb 19, 2013)

Vai has always had a sense of self-awareness and self-irony, and that is good. Necessary, even.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

Me said:


> I hear he can be very particular about how he wants things to sound. I imagine his dealings with some folks in that respect probably have something to do with what you've heard.
> 
> By that same logic, Zappa was also a dick.
> 
> ...



For some reason, I feel the need to explain my thought process in this...

As a child, no matter how great anything I EVER did was, my dad would always tell me, "I see room for improvement."

Some folks take this sort of thing well and others take it as harsh criticism as they feel they deserve a pat on the back.

At 13 years old, I--for the first time EVER--got straight A's. Never had I ever been more proud of anything I'd ever done. I brought it home and handed it to my father triumphantly only for him to reply... 

"Hm... I see room for improvement..."

You see, they also graded us on work habits and classroom conduct with the following three grades: U- Unsatisfactory, S- Satisfactory, O- Outstanding.

I had received A's in all classes but didn't get O's in all the extra categories...

I could have taken this to mean I'll never be good enough but I instead chose to feel that I can always be better. To me it feels better to think of it that way. Attempts to instill the same train of thought in those around me have led to ppl thinking I'm too intense, a dick, etc...


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 19, 2013)

Vai used to be kind of a douche when he was 25-29. But hell, the guy is a genius and a true artist. He can afford to be a douche.

Same goes for Fred Durst.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

Whoa... A comparison between Vai and Durst?

Elizabeth! It's the big one! I'm comin' to join ya!


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 19, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Whoa... A comparison between Vai and Durst?
> 
> Elizabeth! It's the big one! I'm comin' to join ya!


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

Has Durst made some amazing musical achievement of which I'm not aware beyond asking me to give him something to break? 

The biggest song on their debut album was a damn cover...


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## UV7BK4LIFE (Feb 19, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Has Durst made some amazing musical achievement of which I'm not aware beyond asking me to give him something to break?
> 
> The biggest song on their debut album was a damn cover...


 
Whoa, in defense of Wes Borland and Wes only, I have that debut album right here and "faith" is not on it. That's probably making "counterfeit" the biggest song on their debut.

And Fred Durst is not a guitarist, he just accidentally hit a few notes in front of an audience, judging by that video.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

I must have been imagining it when I bought that very same album...


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 19, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Has Durst made some amazing musical achievement of which I'm not aware beyond asking me to give him something to break?
> 
> The biggest song on their debut album was a damn cover...



You can't be this thick. I was being sarcastic about Fred.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

On this site, you can never be too sure. And it wouldn't be the first time you said, or implied something I thought to be completely asinine...


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## s_k_mullins (Feb 19, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> I must have been imagining it when I bought that very same album...



Yep the 1st album definitely has the "Faith" cover. Maybe they released an alternate version in Europe.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

^That's possible.


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 19, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> On this site, you can never be too sure. And it wouldn't be the first time you said, or implied something I thought to be completely asinine...



It would've been the 1115th time, actually.


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## Overtone (Feb 19, 2013)

2 funny stories...

Vai... my sister had some old metal/hard rock magazines lying around. I was flipping through them and one of the short articles was about Vai getting into Whitesnake and a brief bio. The pic was Steve chilling and playing, with a pretty bitchin' 80's chick next to him wearing just spandex pants IIRC. 

My old guitar teacher was playing a festival that included YJM among others. He supposedly needed a pick for the gig and lost his, so he asked Yngwie for one. Yngwie flips him a quarter and says "there's a guitar shop down the street!" This was old, btw... he's supposedly a lot more laid back now.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

Damn, Yngwie... Cold blooded.


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## Riffer (Feb 19, 2013)

Yngwie wouldn't even accept a free donut from Dimebag! It's documented on video.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 19, 2013)

Link me! I keep hearing about that and I've never seen that shit. Been looking.


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## Jakke (Feb 19, 2013)

Riffer said:


> Yngwie wouldn't even accept a free donut from Dimebag! It's documented on video.



It can also be a swedish thing. We generally do not do favours for acquaintances (but for friends of course), as that would make them owe us one, and that is not something we desire. With that unspoken social contract, one might see how Yngwie was reluctant to do that, it's just not simply something that we do between people we hardly know.


Sounds weird, but that's how we roll


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## Overtone (Feb 19, 2013)

That video is one of the greatest things I've ever seen... I'll try to find it but he's been pretty vehement about getting it taken down. Maybe he still is a douche then


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## Overtone (Feb 19, 2013)

Yeah can't find it. But it's not just a Swedish culture thing... he makes it clear that he "don't like fucking donuts!"


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## Jakke (Feb 19, 2013)

I see, well, I haven't seen it myself. Guess he was a douche


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## redstone (Feb 19, 2013)

10 Shawn Lane
9 Chuck Schuldiner
8 Michael Romeo
7 Jason Becker
6 Mattias Eklundh
5 Ron Thal
4 Guthrie Govan
3 Ihsahn
2 Tosin Abasi
1 Misha Mansoor

Discuss.


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## Jzbass25 (Feb 19, 2013)

^ Jason Becker, release the Kraken =P


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## redstone (Feb 19, 2013)

Just aiming for the WW3


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## Grand Moff Tim (Feb 19, 2013)

The reactions this list has gotten are almost enough to make me wish I had written it.


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## Randy (Feb 19, 2013)

redstone said:


> 10 Shawn Lane
> 9 Chuck Schuldiner
> 8 Michael Romeo
> 7 Jason Becker
> ...



Problem SSO?


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## tedtan (Feb 19, 2013)

datalore said:


> Here's a definition from Urban Dictionary that fits my intended meaning:
> 
> An individual who has an over-inflated sense of self worth, compounded by a low level of intellegence, behaving ridiculously in front of colleagues with no sense of how moronic he appears.
> 
> ...


 


Let me see if I understand you correctly: you don't care for Creed's music, therefore Mark Tremonti:
Suffers from an overinflated sense of self worth,
Lacks intelligence,
Behaves ridiculously (possibly only in the presence of colleagues),
Willingly wrote & performed Creed songs,
Is egotistical,
Lacks wisdom, and
Plays "sloppy, mindless shred garbage"
and because of these things he is a douche. And he is even more of a douche because someone somewhere in this thread said Vai was a douche.

Hmmm... #4 is a fact, but all six of the other points are just your own prejudices that you are projecting onto him, not actual facts.

And number 4 is called a job.

I don't care one way or the other about Tremonti, but I don't see how he is the douche here. By all acounts he is a regular guy who loves music - the exact opposite of a douche.


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## Riffer (Feb 19, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Link me! I keep hearing about that and I've never seen that shit. Been looking.


 


Overtone said:


> Yeah can't find it. But it's not just a Swedish culture thing... he makes it clear that he "don't like fucking donuts!"


 
The clip with Yngwie starts at 7:06 in the video. Dimebag is filming whille a roadie does the donuts offering. Classic Dimebag.


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## UV7BK4LIFE (Feb 20, 2013)

Riffer said:


> Yngwie wouldn't even accept a free donut from Dimebag! It's documented on video.


 


Konfyouzd said:


> Link me! I keep hearing about that and I've never seen that shit. Been looking.


 
It's on the "3 - Vulgar videos from hell" Pantera video/DVD. And I stand corrected, "Faith" is on that first LB album. I overlooked it, at 02:00 AM stuff like that happens


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 20, 2013)

At 7:08 in this video. See Malmsteen rejecting a doughnut:

Pantera Home Video PT. 1 (Cowboys From Hell Era) - YouTube


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## Draceius (Feb 20, 2013)

m3l-mrq3z said:


> At 7:08 in this video. See Malmsteen rejecting a doughnut:
> 
> Pantera Home Video PT. 1 (Cowboys From Hell Era) - YouTube



Riffer posted that same video 5 hours ago...


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 20, 2013)

Jakke said:


> It can also be a swedish thing. We generally do not do favours for acquaintances (but for friends of course), as that would make them owe us one, and that is not something we desire. With that unspoken social contract, one might see how Yngwie was reluctant to do that, it's just not simply something that we do between people we hardly know.
> 
> 
> Sounds weird, but that's how we roll



Maybe that's why the Swedish guy I worked with at my last job struck me as such a dick in random circumstances... 

And wow Malmsteen was mad about that donut...


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 20, 2013)

Draceius said:


> Riffer posted that same video 5 hours ago...



It's worth watching it twice.


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## WarMachine (Feb 20, 2013)

ncfiala said:


> written by some retard who thinks that Kurt Cobain is the greatest guitarist of all time.


 This, end thread. And whats worse, i remember when i first started playing guitar i had a guitar world, guitar legends 100 greatest solos of all time.....smells like teen spirit....top 5???? I didnt even know that song HAD a solo!


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 20, 2013)

Hey man... I learned like every Nirvana song between the ages of 14 and 17... I thought was so good...


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## WarMachine (Feb 20, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Hey man... I learned like every Nirvana song between the ages of 14 and 17... I thought was so good...


LMFAO


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## datalore (Feb 20, 2013)

tedtan said:


> Let me see if I understand you correctly: you don't care for Creed's music, therefore Mark Tremonti:
> 
> Suffers from an overinflated sense of self worth,
> Lacks intelligence,
> ...



No, you don't understand me correctly. I'm not making those inferences about Mark Tremonti because I don't like Creed's music. I'm basing my judgments of Mark Tremonti on the following behaviours:

-He wrote and performed a lot of horrible music in Creed, for a very long time (Note - this is not just a job. He was a founding member of the band. Even if it were just a job, nobody wins points with me by creating terrible music).
-He plays long solos that include lots of notes and tricks, with sloppy technique and little harmonic or melodic structure.
-His stage presence includes things like throwing up devil horns while doing one-handed tapping solos.

He may well be very humble and very intelligent, but it's hard for me to believe that someone possessing those characteristics would do what I described above. Again, these are just my opinions.


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## Dayviewer (Feb 20, 2013)

datalore said:


> -He wrote and performed a lot of horrible music in Creed, for a very long time (Note - this is not just a job. He was a founding member of the band. Even if it were just a job, nobody wins points with me by creating terrible music)








I can understand your other 2 statements but this is just pure opinion.

Let me just say that if most of the Creed hate is towards Stapp, if that stuff was sung by Myles Kennedy and passed off as Alter Bridge very very little people would still say the same.
A lot of things on Alter Bridge's debut are also very Creed-ish, which is hardly considered as a terrible album at all.
But then again, that's also, just my opinion.
This discussion is endless


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## Semichastny (Feb 20, 2013)

Just want to throw this out there...

If bending a note causes the playing to be considered "emotional" then wouldn't meshuggah's Nothing be pretty emotional?


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 20, 2013)

Yay... This thread got funny again...

And to answer the question posed above... No... You have to bend ONE note in the same position indefinitely. Meshuggah used more than one position to achieve their sound and thus are devoid of emotion. Thanks for playing...


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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 20, 2013)

Smells like teen spirit was indeed easy, yet fun to play.

Tan taTA...shssksksk Tan ta TA turururuRUm, Tan taTA...shssksksk Tan ta TA turururuRUm


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 20, 2013)

^ That...


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## Alberto7 (Feb 20, 2013)

Ok, no, I lied. I can't stay away from this thread  too funny. Can't resist.


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## ilyti (Feb 20, 2013)

Jzbass25 said:


> I would have probably started a literal riot if the article said Jason Becker as any number on the list.


The only reason he is not on the list is the writer has not heard of him. He seems to think anyone with playing ability and showmanship is a douche. So yeah he would come to the same conclusion about Jason, the most down to earth guitarist I can think of.


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## sylcfh (Feb 21, 2013)

Riffer said:


> I love Steve Lukather! Dude has some tasty riffs.





Without him, we wouldn't have this:


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## sylcfh (Feb 21, 2013)




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## m3l-mrq3z (Feb 21, 2013)

^Sounds much better than Limp Bizkit's latest record.


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## Bruceywilliams (Feb 21, 2013)

HERMAN FUCKING LI. Seriously I cant stand his stupid whammy pacman tricks


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## datalore (Feb 22, 2013)

Bruceywilliams said:


> HERMAN FUCKING LI. Seriously I cant stand his stupid whammy pacman tricks



Herman Li is such a dork.


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## Matt_D_ (Feb 22, 2013)

leechmasterargentina said:


> *3. Michael Angelo Batio
> That phrase is awesome hahahah! He's a douchemeister *


*

it scares me that HE LOOKS EXACTLY THE SAME now, its as if he's some kind of crazy shredder time lord shredding his way through time.

also holy crap he can play. i'd love to see him play some jazz or something (which he's apparently a big fan of outside of his 'persona'). guy is a total non-douche though, everyone i've spoken to who's met him has always said he's totally awesome and cool and just loves what he does. 

remember video is from the 80's*


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## abandonist (Feb 22, 2013)

I have a friend that looks almost identical to Herman Li.


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## tm20 (Feb 22, 2013)

i wonder if the list could be made entirely of people from this forum


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## Malkav (Feb 22, 2013)

abandonist said:


> I have a friend that looks almost identical to Herman Li.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 22, 2013)

ilyti said:


> The only reason he is not on the list is the writer has not heard of him. He seems to think anyone with playing ability and showmanship is a douche. So yeah he would come to the same conclusion about Jason, the most down to earth guitarist I can think of.



Shreds with one hand... Yoyo in the other??



DOUCHE!!!!

Everyone has to stand on stage with that John Petrucci poker face.


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## BucketheadRules (Feb 22, 2013)

datalore said:


> -He plays long solos that include lots of notes and tricks, with sloppy technique and little harmonic or melodic structure.



Bullshit.



> -His stage presence includes things like throwing up devil horns while doing one-handed tapping solos.



Has it occurred to you that this may be done with a hint of irony?


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 22, 2013)

"He's trollin' teh metulz, brah!"

Ppl on this forum pay A LOT of attention to things they don't like. Aren't there better uses of time?


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## Jakke (Feb 22, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Maybe that's why the Swedish guy I worked with at my last job struck me as such a dick in random circumstances...



He might have been just a dick as well


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## sylcfh (Feb 22, 2013)

Kerry King is easily the top douche.


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## sylcfh (Feb 22, 2013)

Zakk Wylde is #2. I'd put him #1, but you can actually hear what he's playing, even if his tone is garbage these days.


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 22, 2013)

Zakk Wylde rocks... 

I'd take him over Kirk Hammett ANY day. I can't stand Hammett... And I still don't think he's a douche... Just don't like his playing.


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## hairychris (Feb 22, 2013)

Ooooh, this guy was missed out....


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## Jakke (Feb 22, 2013)

Cool guitar though

And I'm not sure if being insane is the same as being a douche


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 22, 2013)

Who the hell is that guy?


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## no_dice (Feb 22, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Who the hell is that guy?



Varg Vikernes (Burzum) I believe


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 22, 2013)

Oh... I thought Mayhem was the psycho band...


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## Jakke (Feb 22, 2013)

^He was a member of Mayhem until he murdered Euronymus (the guitar player)


He's also a raving racist


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## Konfyouzd (Feb 22, 2013)

Oooohh...


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## Jakke (Feb 22, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Oooohh...



I have no idea if you're sarcastic or something

He has a website where he spreads his bullshit, and one of his key-beliefs is that evolution must be false, because _how_ could the superior white people come from those monkey-like africans?


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## hairychris (Feb 25, 2013)

Jakke said:


> I have no idea if you're sarcastic or something
> 
> He has a website where he spreads his bullshit, and one of his key-beliefs is that evolution must be false, because _how_ could the superior white people come from those monkey-like africans?



His website is fucking hilarious.


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## LLink2411 (Feb 25, 2013)

Where is Mustaine?


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## sylcfh (Feb 25, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Zakk Wylde rocks...
> 
> I'd take him over Kirk Hammett ANY day. I can't stand Hammett... And I still don't think he's a douche... Just don't like his playing.







Squeals vs Wah.

Not sure if getting sober had anything to do with it, but Zakk's recent tones are not a wall of noise anymore.




Shit tone I was referring to:


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## Alberto7 (Feb 25, 2013)

sylcfh said:


> Squeals vs Wah.
> 
> Not sure if getting sober had anything to do with it, but Zakk's recent tones are not a wall of noise anymore.
> 
> ...



All the shit tone I'm hearing from those videos is just shitty recording. The first video seems to have been recorded with an incredibly muffed mic/EQ/whatever. Even his voice sounds muffled as hell. It's as if they just rolled off all high frequencies to zero.
The second video seems to have been recorded from a cellphone (and/or an old digital camera).
Can't really judge tone from such recording quality.


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## clubshred (Feb 28, 2013)

This list was utter bullshit - there are so many other guitar players that could have made that list. The "author" is a troll and most likely a failed guitar player who reveled in the days when "solos weren't kewl" circa 1992-1995.

Go fuck yourself...


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## sylcfh (Feb 28, 2013)

Alberto7 said:


> All the shit tone I'm hearing from those videos is just shitty recording. The first video seems to have been recorded with an incredibly muffed mic/EQ/whatever. Even his voice sounds muffled as hell. It's as if they just rolled off all high frequencies to zero.
> The second video seems to have been recorded from a cellphone (and/or an old digital camera).
> Can't really judge tone from such recording quality.





I know youtube compresses the shit out of videos, but Guitar World did higher level record of Zakk...


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Feb 28, 2013)

sylcfh said:


>




Not sure if douche or three sheets to the wind.


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## Dooky (Mar 1, 2013)

I don't particularly dislike or like Zakk Wylde, but I did used to find it funny that, for awhile there, in ever 2nd photo he'd pose with his mouth wide open. e.g:


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## WarMachine (Mar 9, 2013)

Konfyouzd said:


> Zakk Wylde rocks...
> 
> I'd take him over Kirk Hammett ANY day. I can't stand Hammett... And I still don't think he's a douche... Just don't like his playing.


Right the fuck on dude!! When people break say a leg or a foot, they use a crutch. When kirk hammet can't play guitar (which is always) his crutch is a wah.


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## crazyprofessor (Mar 9, 2013)

What a joke this writer is. If you're gonna rip on my favorite players, some of which are super gracious to their fans (Vai for example), know your fucking facts at least. 

If I meet the guy I'll give him a fucking wedgie but then again he posts ANONYMOUSLY so there goes that plan. What a joke.


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## ShadyDavey (Mar 9, 2013)

hairychris said:


> Ooooh, this guy was missed out....
> 
> *snip*Varg*snip*


 
Is he attempting to look bad-ass in socks? Interesting choice of instrument however....

I think it's possible to say that it's the nature of the beast to corrupt practically all guitarists into being a douche at one point in time or another. Whether it's a momentary lack of judgment or a lifelong career is the key point to examine ^^


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## SlaveUnit (Mar 9, 2013)

Satch shouldn't be there at all.


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## p4vl (Oct 14, 2014)

SlaveUnit said:


> Satch shouldn't be there at all.



And Modern Rock Journalists should not talk about guitar players at all. 

Jon Nödtveidt from Dissection was a douche, in spite of being a kickass guitar player (no shredding). He made 2 brilliant swedish black/death/etc. metal albums in the early-mid 90's and then is involved in the stabbing of a gay guy. 7 years in prison.

He gets out and makes a ultra banal melodic death metal album, the kind that was for sale by the pound before he went into prison. Then he shoots himself because according to his self-styled beliefs "He had nothing left to accomplish on Earth."

May Kali squirt you into her nether regions, Jon. Thou art a douche.


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## ChaNce (Oct 15, 2014)

Remember, we all have to be careful of making the fundamental attribution error:

When I act badly, it is because of something in the environment or something that happened to me, and I don't usually act badly. When you act badly, it is because there is something intrinsically wrong with you, and you will always be that way.

I would also like to know how much of the bad behavior captured on video in this thread (e.g., Yngwie and Durst) are pharmacologically enhanced.


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## flint757 (Oct 15, 2014)

Bad behavior is always caused by ones mental state and environment though. Of course we are going to forgive our misgivings much easier over those of another because likely someone who doesn't either goes to a really dark place (metaphorically speaking) or would likely kill themselves because that shit would be depressing.

For certain types of behavior/events I'd be inclined to use that logic so as not to judge too quickly/harshly, but douchiness isn't really one of them.  When you are a repeat offender of douchy behavior it becomes a lot harder to overlook as well.


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## ChaNce (Oct 15, 2014)

It's the repeat behavior that is key. 

One thing I always hear cool celebs say is that while they may have numerous interactions with fans every day, a particular fan may only ever interact with them once in their lives. They therefore have a responsibility to make that interaction as positive as possible.

"Bad behavior is always caused by ones mental state and environment though."

Well, sort of. The fundamental attribution error basically states that you have to be careful in assessing other's behavior because they may be in a mental state (due to the environment or other external factors) that is very different from their usual self. The only way you can be sure is to observe that individual's behavior over time.


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Oct 15, 2014)

p4vl said:


> And Modern Rock Journalists should not talk about guitar players at all.
> 
> Jon Nödtveidt from Dissection was a douche... ...involved in the stabbing of a gay guy. 7 years in prison.



That's not a douche. 

That's human scum.


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## Thorerges (Oct 15, 2014)

HeHasTheJazzHands said:


> That's not a douche.
> 
> That's human scum.



Jon Andreas Nödtveidt was a demented man. He joined/initiated some satanic cult (he really believed this nonsense) and eventually killed himself for what appears to be, no apparent reason. He shot himself in the middle of a circle of candles, idiot.


----------

