# C, Eb and G Walk Into a Bar...



## Ciprian (Feb 3, 2009)

I just got this in the mail:

"C, E-flat and G go into a bar. The bartender says, "sorry,
but we don't serve minors." So E-flat leaves, and C and G
have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the
fifth is diminished and G is out flat. F comes in and tries
to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough.

D comes in and heads for the bathroom saying, "Excuse me.
I'll just be a second." Then A comes in, but the bartender
is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor.
Then the bartender notices B-flat hiding at the end of the
bar and says, "Get out! You're the seventh minor I've found
in this bar tonight."

E-Flat comes back the next night in a three-piece suit with
nicely shined shoes. The bartender says, "you're looking
sharp tonight. Come on in, this could be a major
development." Sure enough, E-flat soon takes off his suit
and everything else, and is au natural.

Eventually C sobers up and realizes in horror that he's
under a rest. C is brought to trial, found guilty of
contributing to the diminution of a minor, and is sentenced
to 10 years of D.S. without Coda at an upscale correctional
facility."


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## TimSE (Feb 3, 2009)

i so nearly got that  ... ?


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## Rick (Feb 3, 2009)




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## vontetzianos (Feb 3, 2009)




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## Unknown Doodl3.2 (Feb 3, 2009)

wow


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## cddragon (Feb 3, 2009)

pretty good way to handle theory


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## Mr. Big Noodles (Feb 3, 2009)

My theory professor brought that one up a couple of semesters back, and I was forced to tell the augmented sixth chords joke. Never again...


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## Piro (Feb 3, 2009)

is it bad that i completely followed the joke?


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## All_¥our_Bass (Feb 3, 2009)

^ Not really.


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## Naren (Feb 3, 2009)

That... was pretty bad...

 But it's funny just how bad it was.


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## BigPhi84 (Feb 3, 2009)

Wow, this has confirmed that I'm a nerd.


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## 6or7mattersnot (Feb 4, 2009)

Do you have to know your theory to understand the joke... Cuz I don't get it... Is it supposed to be a way to remember whatever all the flats and augmenteds and things like that have to do w/ notes? Confusions hurteth my brains...


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## Mr. Big Noodles (Feb 5, 2009)

You have to know your major scale theory. C is assumed to be the tonic. Eb is a minor third away from C. When you take out the third from a triad, you have an open fifth, which has a double meaning here as a bottle of booze. I don't get the F, is it trying to be F#? Uh, D is the second of C minor, A is the sixth (the relative minor) of C major, Bb is a minor seventh from C, Eb sharpened is just E, which would make C a major chord...

Music jokes are lame, but they're the only way to know you're in good company.


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## TonalArchitect (Feb 6, 2009)

^ On the contrary, I adore this particular joke, but many music jokes are lame. 

Also, tell me the augmented sixths joke; I must know it!


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## JakeRI (Feb 6, 2009)

its better if you say it out loud


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## Mr. Big Noodles (Feb 6, 2009)

Oh, man, the augmented sixth chords joke. I don't remember exactly how it goes, but a German sixth, a French sixth, and an Italian sixth are going to a party, and they're each told to bring a fifth. The German gets there. His wine is perfect, you know, because he's German. The French sixth arrives next with a bottle of flat wine, because he's French. And finally, the Italian arrives, stumbling, without a fifth, because he's Italian and drank it along the way. Woohoo for ethnocentrist stereotypes.


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## TonalArchitect (Feb 7, 2009)

A stereotyping harmony joke. There's a great deal of irony somewhere. 

Who makes up these things?



JakeRI said:


> its better if you say it out loud





I read this joke to my friends who are in orchestra, and they cracked up.


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## Mr. Big Noodles (Feb 7, 2009)

TonalArchitect said:


> A stereotyping harmony joke. There's a great deal of irony somewhere.
> 
> Who makes up these things?


I'm just setting it up for the Chinese sixth, the Canadian sixth, and the American sixth.


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## BigPhi84 (Feb 11, 2009)

You know, there's really such a thing as a Chinese Seventh in the Barbershop realm! LOL. The lead and tenor voices are a major 2nd apart.


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## Mr. Big Noodles (Feb 11, 2009)

I did not know that. Ice creeeeeeeeeeam!


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## Mattmc74 (Feb 11, 2009)




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## JoryGriffin (Feb 22, 2009)

This is awesome


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## liquidcow (Feb 22, 2009)

SchecterWhore said:


> A is the sixth (the relative minor) of C major



A is the relative minor and also the major 6th, which is why the bartender is not convinced that A is not a minor.


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