# The Florida NOPE Spider



## incinerated_guitar (Oct 11, 2013)

Seriously, who the hell gets the bright idea of "Hey, I'm gonna bring this super sketchy spider to the states and .... everyone's day up when they hear about it."?  This for some reason reminds me of that new spider that started becoming known in Florida not too long ago that likes to sit under toilet seats and bite whoever sits down.


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## Xaios (Oct 11, 2013)




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## KJGaruda (Oct 11, 2013)

I said 'NOPE' when I saw the first thumbnail for the video too.

So I vote, kill it with fire.


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## AxeHappy (Oct 11, 2013)

Somebody brought the huntsman to North America? .... me. Keep that shit in Aussieland. 

Although, from what I understand they have a fairly weak bite that isn't particularly venomous. 

I also thought that some sort of Goliath Tarantula was the world's biggest spider?


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## ittoa666 (Oct 11, 2013)

Nope. Get that shit out of here.


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## Kwirk (Oct 11, 2013)

I, for one, welcome our new spider overlords.


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## Chuck (Oct 11, 2013)

Back to Nebraska...


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## sniperfreak223 (Oct 11, 2013)

I'm actually not bothered by spiders in the slightest, and hell, I really want to see one of these in person now.


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## ShawnFjellstad (Oct 11, 2013)

Am I missing something. What the .... is everyone talking about?


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## incinerated_guitar (Oct 11, 2013)

AxeHappy said:


> Although, from what I understand they have a fairly weak bite that isn't particularly venomous.



They can't kill us, but it'll hurt like hell, swell up, and cause you to feel nauseous, as well as even vomit or faint.


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## incinerated_guitar (Oct 11, 2013)

sniperfreak223 said:


> I'm actually not bothered by spiders in the slightest, and hell, I really want to see one of these in person now.



Are....are you one of them?


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## Vhyle (Oct 11, 2013)

Kwirk said:


> I, for one, welcome our new spider overlords.



Perhaps this spider was sent as a disciple from Djod.


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## AxeHappy (Oct 11, 2013)

incinerated_guitar said:


> They can't kill us, but it'll hurt like hell, swell up, and cause you to feel nauseous, as well as even vomit or faint.



Well ..... Seriously, who brought these assholes over. We do *NOT* need ....ing house Spiders in North America. 

I am going to have to be so much raid now.

I have also been led to believe they can run rather fast. And they are big enough so that when they get angry/scared/territorial they will stand upish and hiss at you. And you will here it. 

Think about that. That is ....ing terrifying. A spider hissing at you. It's like a mix of a cat and a spider. ....ing rape everywhere.


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Oct 11, 2013)




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## JEngelking (Oct 11, 2013)




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## Adam Of Angels (Oct 11, 2013)

As a resident of West Palm, I am hoping this is fake/untrue. The other day, there was a tiny spider on the outside of my car's windshield while I was driving, and I thought about not getting out of the car... Seriously. So basically, these things need to not be real.


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## GuitaristOfHell (Oct 11, 2013)

JEngelking said:


>


 +rep for this. Those spiders are no match for a torch tho.


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## pink freud (Oct 11, 2013)

sniperfreak223 said:


> I'm actually not bothered by spiders in the slightest, and hell, I really want to see one of these in person now.



I'm not bothered by a spider. Since I live in an area where spiders rarely get over an inch big, they aren't very creepy.

I WOULD, however, be bothered by a spider larger than my face raising 200 of her offspring in my home.


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## Xaios (Oct 11, 2013)

GuitaristOfHell said:


> +rep for this. Those spiders are no match for a torch tho.



Dude, seen their legs? They'd probably yank the torch out of your hands!


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## Rick (Oct 11, 2013)

Kwirk said:


> I, for one, welcome our new spider overlords.


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## oracles (Oct 11, 2013)

As an Aussie, all I can say is "meh". Huntsmen are nothing worth worrying about. Their size can make them appear intimidating to some, sure, but they're relatively harmless, and they're very timid spiders.


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## User Name (Oct 11, 2013)




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## Nile (Oct 11, 2013)

oracles said:


> As an Aussie, all I can say is "meh". Huntsmen are nothing worth worrying about. Their size can make them appear intimidating to some, sure, but they're relatively harmless, and they're very timid spiders.



Doesn't change the fact they are big enough to fist fight me.


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## User Name (Oct 11, 2013)

Nile said:


> Doesn't change the fact they are big enough to fist me.



lol wut


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## Adam Of Angels (Oct 11, 2013)

oracles said:


> As an Aussie, all I can say is "meh". Huntsmen are nothing worth worrying about. Their size can make them appear intimidating to some, sure, but they're relatively harmless, and they're very timid spiders.




Yeah, I'm not taking your word for it on this one


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Oct 11, 2013)

oracles said:


> As an Aussie, all I can say is "meh". Huntsmen are nothing worth worrying about. Their size can make them appear intimidating to some, sure, but they're relatively harmless, and they're very timid spiders.



Your argument is invalid because *FVCKING HUGE SPIDER FROM THE PITS OF FVCKING HELL*.


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## LordCashew (Oct 11, 2013)

YouTube said:


> It's best to try to relocate the spider instead of killing it, because spiders play an important role in controlling the population of other insects and pests.



Seriously? Now spiders don't bother me at all. But this is a voracious, venomous invasive species and this guy thinks we shouldn't be killing them?


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## HUGH JAYNUS (Oct 11, 2013)




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## Sephiroth952 (Oct 11, 2013)

My proposal in comic form...


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## synrgy (Oct 11, 2013)

Thanks, OP. I'll send you my psychiatrist's bill when it comes in.


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## Xaios (Oct 11, 2013)

Comics are relevant:


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## viesczy (Oct 11, 2013)

C'mon guys, really? It is a spider man! It doesn't even 2 lbs!

Remember what the Joker said to the Mob guys the first time he walked in on them, did your [email protected]$ drop off?

Derek


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## Chuck (Oct 11, 2013)




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## Datura (Oct 11, 2013)

Another Australian here, huntsman spiders are scared of humans, butluckily we don't get the 'Giant Huntsman' breed in Australia, a separate type.


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## Vhyle (Oct 11, 2013)

It's a huntsman spider. It has its own health bar and doesn't afraid of anything.


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## jeleopard (Oct 12, 2013)

Seriously, laughing so hard at the comments, now I have to go pee.


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## Jzbass25 (Oct 12, 2013)

I use to have a place where sometimes they could get in, you'd see a giant-ass scary thing either in the doorway or on your ceiling and you'd be like OH GOD RUN, BURN THE HOUSE


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## pink freud (Oct 12, 2013)

Vhyle said:


> It's a huntsman spider. It has its own health bar and doesn't afraid of anything.



I'm not concerned unless I see it obtain a mana bar.


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## Bodes (Oct 12, 2013)

Only time they are scary is when this happens...






... Or same thing when grabbing for a towel.


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## Waelstrum (Oct 12, 2013)

Most of the time spiders won't attack humans. It's not in their best interests. If a spider bites you, _maybe_ you'll die, most of the time you'll get a bit sick. If you bite a spider, it's curtains for them.

Also:


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## Necris (Oct 12, 2013)

I'm far less afraid of a large spider I can identify than a small one that I can't.


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## Chuck (Oct 12, 2013)

Necris said:


> I'm far less afraid of a large spider I can identify than a small one that I can't.



Yes but small spiders I can flick off me. I'll be lucky if this thing moves an inch if I sucker punch it!


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## Hollowway (Oct 12, 2013)

Necris said:


> I'm far less afraid of a large spider I can identify than a small one that I can't.



Cuz you know some spiders so big they have names? That's scary!


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## sniperfreak223 (Oct 12, 2013)

I still find the fear of spiders to be funny, especially the fear of large spiders. Unless you're an Aussie who has to deal with funnelwebs, all the really dangerous spiders are relatively tiny...and call me what you will, but I'm one of those people who never kills spiders.


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## Chuck (Oct 12, 2013)

It makes perfect sense for the average person to be terrified or large spiders though.


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## sniperfreak223 (Oct 12, 2013)

I guess...and I'm still firmly under the impression that my love of spiders and snakes may well be the reason I'm still single.


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## Sephiroth952 (Oct 12, 2013)

sniperfreak223 said:


> I guess...and I'm still firmly under the impression that my love of spiders and snakes may well be the reason I'm still single.


A shame, we need to breed your inhuman ability to not be afraid of spiders so that one day when they decide to take over we can fight back.


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## Chuck (Oct 12, 2013)

sniperfreak223 said:


> I guess...and I'm still firmly under the impression that my love of spiders and snakes may well be the reason I'm still single.



And owning 52 oddly shaped guitars


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## sniperfreak223 (Oct 12, 2013)

Hey!!! 5 of them are "normal" shapes, if you consider Ovation acoustics normal...


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## BucketheadRules (Oct 12, 2013)

I don't even live in America but I want to join the gif fun.


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## Adrian-XI (Oct 12, 2013)

I remember when I was younger we were driving up to my nan and pops when I looked up and there was this fuking HUGE huntsman on the roof (yep, inside the car). I grabbed my younger brother and used him as a shield until we could pull over. We were all screaming and shit, crazy. I honestly can't think of a time in my life where I have been more petrified. 

I hate spiders!


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## dedsouth333 (Oct 12, 2013)

Adrian-XI said:


> I grabbed my younger brother and used him as a shield...





That was ....ing great.


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## Splinterhead (Oct 12, 2013)

insects with muscles=NOPE


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## Datura (Oct 12, 2013)

One time I walked into the bathroom and a huntsman just jumped off the wall at me.
...Australia


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## Nile (Oct 12, 2013)

Datura said:


> One time I walked into the bathroom and a huntsman just jumped off the wall at me.
> ...Australia


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## larry (Oct 12, 2013)

nope.

nope nope nope.
I _was_ using hairspray and a lighter. time to upgrade.


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## lawizeg (Oct 12, 2013)

I could never go to Australia, ever, for that reason. I would have psychotic break if a spider that big ever _jumped_ at me.

EDIT: LOL

JUST realized that THInG straight out of HADES is in my country LOL. Even less reason to go to Florida.


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## HUGH JAYNUS (Oct 12, 2013)

I don't fear spiders. They just piss me off cuz my house has a problem with them and I'm too cheap to spray for them so at least once a week I get bit by one. And everytime I go to shower one is sitting in the bottom like, "hey bro, pass that loofa".


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## narad (Oct 12, 2013)

Yup, took this picture while I was living in Australia. Heard a bunch of girl screams from the bathroom, apparently this guy was on the towel rack:






I felt bad when I identified it online as a harmless, timid, non-venomous creature, after two of us had to smash it to bits with a broomstick, but it's Australia - better to proceed with extreme prejudice.


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## pink freud (Oct 12, 2013)

METAL_WIZARD said:


> I don't fear spiders. They just piss me off cuz my house has a problem with them and I'm too cheap to spray for them so at least once a week I get bit by one. And everytime I go to shower one is sitting in the bottom like, "hey bro, pass that loofa".



Seeing as spiders are carnivorous, I'd be worried about the amount of prey-insects you probably have that are sustaining all of those spiders...


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## asfeir (Oct 12, 2013)

I find huge spiders in my house all the time. most of them on the ceiling and pretty fast. I could never identify them but most of them are big fat and hairy. 
best solution is a lighter and a Deodorant spray. they burn quite instantly lol.


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## Tommy (Oct 12, 2013)

I think the shock of seeing a big ass spider in my house would be the only that would freak me out, I'd probably just relocate him outside. I like spiders for the most. I let most spiders live in my house, they have webs in pretty much every corner of every room. One, I'm too damn lazy to clean and two, they eat all the little gnats and mosquitos. 

I also live in New Mexico and we have tarantulas here so maybe that's another reason I'm okay with big spiders.


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## icos211 (Oct 12, 2013)

Looks like a spider and everything


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## MJS (Oct 12, 2013)

If you come across one of these spiders, the safest thing to do is just sit there and be perfectly still... while waiting for an ant to come along and kill it for you.


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## pink freud (Oct 12, 2013)

MJS said:


> If you come across one of these spiders, the safest thing to do is just sit there and be perfectly still... while waiting for an ant to come along and kill it for you.




Ants are brutal, but nothing in the insect world is as brutal as the m-fing WASP. The whole plot line to Alien is actually "What if wasps were big and did to us what they do to other bugs."


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## Alberto7 (Oct 12, 2013)

So, after some testing, researching, surveying, and probing around, I can safely conclude that SSO's spider threads (pun intended) rank among my favorite things in the world ever.


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## Yo_Wattup (Oct 12, 2013)

oracles said:


> As an Aussie, all I can say is "meh". Huntsmen are nothing worth worrying about. Their size can make them appear intimidating to some, sure, but they're relatively harmless, and they're very timid spiders.



+1 biiiiig faaaaat MEH. I see huntsmans every so often in my house and just leave em. They seem to do everything in their power to stay out of your way. Tried picking one up but again, too timid and quick.


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## Datura (Oct 12, 2013)

Mm every huntsman you see gets less scary.

edit: reminds me though, when I was living in new Zealand I went into the bathroom at night and in the corner of my eye, in the reflection of the mirror I could see a huntsman sized spider (wasn't a huntsman though) on my shoulder. Lived there for 7 years and the only time I saw a spider that big was on my arm.


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## muffinbutton (Oct 12, 2013)

Yo_Wattup said:


> +1 biiiiig faaaaat MEH. I see huntsmans every so often in my house and just leave em. They seem to do everything in their power to stay out of your way. Tried picking one up but again, too timid and quick.



You tried picking one of those up? Are you not human or something?


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## Chuck (Oct 13, 2013)

I will never go to Australia now. 

Thank you SSO


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## lawizeg (Oct 13, 2013)

Funny thing is I may be going to the Middle East on a trip for two weeks...oh boy


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## pink freud (Oct 13, 2013)

Chuck said:


> I will never go to Australia now.
> 
> Thank you SSO



I see you live in Florida. Hope you have nice dreams: Spiders of Florida Photo Gallery by Daniel D. Dye at pbase.com


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## Nile (Oct 13, 2013)

Datura said:


> Mm every huntsman you see gets less scary.
> 
> edit: reminds me though, when I was living in new Zealand I went into the bathroom at night and in the corner of my eye, in the reflection of the mirror I could see a huntsman sized spider (wasn't a huntsman though) on my shoulder. Lived there for 7 years and the only time I saw a spider that big was on my arm.


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## Chuck (Oct 13, 2013)

pink freud said:


> I see you live in Florida. Hope you have nice dreams: Spiders of Florida Photo Gallery by Daniel D. Dye at pbase.com



No way in hell am I clicking that link


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## lobee (Oct 13, 2013)




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## Chuck (Oct 13, 2013)

^


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## Sephiroth952 (Oct 13, 2013)

Lets make this a cute jumping spider thread.


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## Bekanor (Oct 13, 2013)

As an Aussie and an arachnophobe of the highest order (I will construct elaborate devices to deal with spiders from a distance and with nuke-from-orbit certainty), the hunstman isn't really a spider to fear for reasons of bite, venom, aggressiveness etc. 

Why you SHOULD fear them is that they react to human presence like the average arachnophobe reacts to theirs. While there's a reasonable amount of distance between the two of you, it'll just sit there checking you out making sure you're not moving closer, trying desperately to pick a rational solution to your presence out of the waves of panicked, raving thoughts currently going through its mind. However when you're coming in with the cup and the cardboard all dignity crumbles under the weight of endless terror. The huntsman will now go absolutely mental, scurrying all over the place at maximum speed, more often than not losing its grip on the wall and on its sanity. 

So it's very likely that through nothing else than mutual horror, the huntsman will be on your person. That said, it still probably won't bite you. 

Just be glad you don't have funnel webs in the states. Incredibly venomous, gigantic fangs and fiercely territorial. All in a package that you can piss off just by moving a rock or poking around in an old shed.


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## SeanSan (Oct 13, 2013)

I'm not from America, but I wouldn't be bothered the same situation happened to me.


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## Alberto7 (Oct 13, 2013)

Bekanor said:


> As an Aussie and an arachnophobe of the highest order (I will construct elaborate devices to deal with spiders from a distance and with nuke-from-orbit certainty), the hunstman isn't really a spider to fear for reasons of bite, venom, aggressiveness etc.
> 
> Why you SHOULD fear them is that they react to human presence like the average arachnophobe reacts to theirs. While there's a reasonable amount of distance between the two of you, it'll just sit there checking you out making sure you're not moving closer, trying desperately to pick a rational solution to your presence out of the waves of panicked, raving thoughts currently going through its mind. However when you're coming in with the cup and the cardboard all dignity crumbles under the weight of endless terror. The huntsman will now go absolutely mental, scurrying all over the place at maximum speed, more often than not losing its grip on the wall and on its sanity.
> 
> ...



I loved this so much. Thank you.


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## sniperfreak223 (Oct 13, 2013)

I'm glad we don't have funnel webs in the states too, those things and Brazilian Wandering Spiders are the only arachnids I'll never want to encounter...they're the Black mambas of the spider world, cool to think about, but wicked venomous complete assholes in person.


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## Bekanor (Oct 14, 2013)

sniperfreak223 said:


> I'm glad we don't have funnel webs in the states too, those things and Brazilian Wandering Spiders are the only arachnids I'll never want to encounter...they're the Black mambas of the spider world, cool to think about, but wicked venomous complete assholes in person.



This thread reminds me that we have too many spider webs around our back patio area. I'm going to have to get some of that home pest control spray and get that shit done. Pity me.


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## Riffer (Oct 14, 2013)




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## Metal-Box (Oct 14, 2013)

I am totally fascinated by this kind of thing.


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## Rosal76 (Oct 14, 2013)

Living is Florida, I would much rather run into a giant spider than those f__king giant cockroaches that I saw in the Philippines. I went there several times to visit family and stuff and could not believe that they (roaches) could grow that big!!! I kept asking my family members if they lived near a nuclear waste plant after seeing one (giant roach) for the first time. WTF???!!!??? When I turned on a light, they didn't run, they looked at me and said, "turn off the light, a__hole".


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## ilyti (Oct 14, 2013)

OK, Americans: You now have Huntsman spiders, reticulated pythons, and any number of dangerous animals introduced to your ecosystem because of the illegal pet trade. But don't forget, you already had plenty of things that will kill you before that: I mean, the Brown Recluse spider is reason enough for me to never want to go south further than New York state.. and that's NATIVE to the USA. 

I had a friend from Australia who was the worst arachnophobe I've ever seen - I have no idea how he managed to survive living there his whole life. He had a nickname for the Huntsman - "Clockspider," because he got a picture of one hiding behind an analog wall clock, it's legs just peeping around the edges of it. That really puts it into perspective.


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## dedsouth333 (Oct 14, 2013)

Metal-Box said:


> I am totally fascinated by this kind of thing.



I bet you are, being so far north 



ilyti said:


> OK, Americans: You now have Huntsman spiders, reticulated pythons, and any number of dangerous animals introduced to your ecosystem because of the illegal pet trade. But don't forget, you already had plenty of things that will kill you before that: I mean, the Brown Recluse spider is reason enough for me to never want to go south further than New York state.. and that's NATIVE to the USA.
> 
> I had a friend from Australia who was the worst arachnophobe I've ever seen - I have no idea how he managed to survive living there his whole life. He had a nickname for the Huntsman - "Clockspider," because he got a picture of one hiding behind an analog wall clock, it's legs just peeping around the edges of it. That really puts it into perspective.



Luckily the only invasive species we have to worry about (at least where I'm at anyway) are the boars.


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## Pezshreds (Oct 14, 2013)

I've got a huntsman who randomly shows up to my house. Always the same one, just sits on my wall in the lounge chillin haha. 
Hunstmans are harmless though.


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## Jake (Oct 14, 2013)

ilyti said:


> I mean, the Brown Recluse spider is reason enough for me to never want to go south further than New York state.. and that's NATIVE to the USA.


I've seen brown recluses around and as terrifying as they are for what they can do to people I've never had a problem with them. From what I gather its more of a "you don't mess with me, I don't mess with you" kind of deal. 

now black widows on the other hand....


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## dedsouth333 (Oct 14, 2013)

717ctsjz said:


> I've seen brown recluses around and as terrifying as they are for what they can do to people I've never had a problem with them. From what I gather its more of a "you don't mess with me, I don't mess with you" kind of deal.



Unless they crawl into your bed. They seem to blame you for that


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## InfinityCollision (Oct 14, 2013)

dedsouth333 said:


> Unless they crawl into your bed. They seem to blame you for that



This. Beds, shoes, sleeping bags, if they find a dark corner and claim it then they will not take kindly to your intrusion.


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## flint757 (Oct 14, 2013)

717ctsjz said:


> I've seen brown recluses around and as terrifying as they are for what they can do to people I've never had a problem with them. From what I gather its more of a "you don't mess with me, I don't mess with you" kind of deal.
> 
> now black widows on the other hand....



Black Widows aren't as bad as the Recluse. Brown recluses venom eats a hole through you and you may not know you were bit until tissue damage has already begun. A Black Widow is only deadly if you're allergic. It will just make you feel sick for a couple of hours for the majority of people. Brown Recluse is so tiny, that actually freaks me out more. If I can see it i can defend myself. Hard to do if it is under 2 cm and hides in dark places.


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## Jake (Oct 14, 2013)

InfinityCollision said:


> This. Beds, shoes, sleeping bags, if they find a dark corner and claim it then they will not take kindly to your intrusion.


This is also true. I ....ing hate spiders in general


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## dedsouth333 (Oct 15, 2013)

InfinityCollision said:


> This. Beds, shoes, sleeping bags, if they find a dark corner and claim it then they will not take kindly to your intrusion.





flint757 said:


> Black Widows aren't as bad as the Recluse. Brown recluses venom eats a hole through you and you may not know you were bit until tissue damage has already begun. A Black Widow is only deadly if you're allergic. It will just make you feel sick for a couple of hours for the majority of people. Brown Recluse is so tiny, that actually freaks me out more. If I can see it i can defend myself. Hard to do if it is under 2 cm and hides in dark places.



Eeexactly...


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## dedsouth333 (Oct 15, 2013)

flint757 said:


> Brown Recluse is so tiny, that actually freaks me out more. If I can see it i can defend myself. Hard to do if it is under 2 cm and hides in dark places.



Especially this part. I mean I don't really have that much against spiders in general (although I'm not their biggest fan either) and for the most part I leave them alone; *but*, recluses I will terminate with extreme prejudice (considering I can get over the heeby jeebies long enough to get around 'em).


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## sniperfreak223 (Oct 15, 2013)

flint757 said:


> Black Widows aren't as bad as the Recluse. Brown recluses venom eats a hole through you and you may not know you were bit until tissue damage has already begun. A Black Widow is only deadly if you're allergic. It will just make you feel sick for a couple of hours for the majority of people. Brown Recluse is so tiny, that actually freaks me out more. If I can see it i can defend myself. Hard to do if it is under 2 cm and hides in dark places.



I've been bitten by a Black Widow, and from my experience, it's more like a few days than a few hours. I was vomiting, running a fever, sweating profusely and having the worst abdominal cramps I've ever experienced in my life for about two days, but it didn't kill me (they chose not to use antivenin, and just treated the fever and abdominal cramps) .

The Brown Recluse, however, all the bites I've seen from those things are really nasty, with all but one resulting in hospital stays and a few even resulting in massive tissue damage and one in a fatality...so I'd definitely rather be bitten by a Black Widow than a Brown Recluse.


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## flint757 (Oct 15, 2013)

I'd rather be bitten by neither.


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## dedsouth333 (Oct 15, 2013)

flint757 said:


> I'd rather be bitten by neither.



You do have a valid point


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## guitareben (Oct 15, 2013)

InfinityCollision said:


> This. Beds, shoes, sleeping bags, if they find a dark corner and claim it then they will not take kindly to your intrusion.



D: 

I am so glad we don't have any nasty spiders in England


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## DoomJazz (Oct 15, 2013)

Reading this thread gets me stoked for the harsh Chicago winter ahead


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## Alberto7 (Oct 15, 2013)

^ Tell me about it. We don't have any bad spiders in Montreal, but where I live is INFESTED with these inoffensive spiders. I normally don't mind them, but in such quantities it's really uncomfortable. Beginning of this summer I got a spider bite on my big toe during the night while I slept, and it got infected. It got all swollen and was throbbing. I felt as though my toe was going to explode. Eventually it spread to my ankle and half of my foot barely fit in my shoe. The itchiness was ridiculous. It was final exam week, too, so you can imagine my frustration. To top it all off, I had to spend 5 hours in a plane the day after the exam. I ended up taking antibiotics for it, and hated my life for 10 full days. Was frigging terrible and it made me despise the spiders around me, regardless of how inoffensive they are. Actually, the tinier the spider, the more I hate it, because I can't see it, and it can crawl anywhere without me noticing. Can't wait for the brutal Canadian winter to begin and freeze all these little bastards to death.

Sorry, had to rant.


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## Waelstrum (Oct 15, 2013)

sniperfreak223 said:


> I've been bitten by a Black Widow, and from my experience, it's more like a few days than a few hours. I was vomiting, running a fever, sweating profusely and having the worst abdominal cramps I've ever experienced in my life for about two days, but it didn't kill me (they chose not to use antivenin, and just treated the fever and abdominal cramps) .
> 
> The Brown Recluse, however, all the bites I've seen from those things are really nasty, with all but one resulting in hospital stays and a few even resulting in massive tissue damage and one in a fatality...so I'd definitely rather be bitten by a Black Widow than a Brown Recluse.



As long as we're comparing venom, platypus venom will certainly ruin your day. It won't kill you. It attacks the pain receptors in the brain, causing you to experience all the pain. It is also resistant to morphine. It will then leave you hyper sensitive to pain for up to a few months.


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## HeHasTheJazzHands (Oct 15, 2013)

Waelstrum said:


> As long as we're comparing venom, platypus venom will certainly ruin your day. It won't kill you. It attacks the pain receptors in the brain, causing you to experience all the pain. It is also resistant to morphine. It will then leave you hyper sensitive to pain for up to a few months.



...



Xaios said:


>





JEngelking said:


>





User Name said:


>





Nile said:


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lawizeg said:


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icos211 said:


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Nile said:


>





717ctsjz said:


>


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## Xaios (Oct 15, 2013)

guitareben said:


> D:
> 
> I am so glad we don't have any nasty spiders in England



Bad news: False widow spider: Ten facts about Britain's most poisonous that almost claimed builder's leg - Mirror Online


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## L1ght (Oct 17, 2013)

I'm sitting here wondering, "How the FVCK does a softball sized spider even make its way in to your house in the first place?"


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## Rotatous (Oct 17, 2013)

Honestly, I can usually deal with spiders - not to say that I like them (AT ALL), but The fact that they don't fly usually makes me a bit more calm when I come across even a big one.

Now, I might be alone on this around here but there's something about wasps and flying, stinging, insects that freaks me out much more. Usually swarms of things freak me out the most (you couldn't get me anywhere near a hornet/yellow jacket/wasp nest), but there are some that make my skin crawl even looking at just one of them...


Specifically insects like the Tarantula Hawk Wasp -










This thing is ....ing brutal, it eats Tarantulas for lunch...


















*shudders*


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## Jake (Oct 17, 2013)

. double post


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## Jake (Oct 17, 2013)

Rotatous said:


> Honestly, I can usually deal with spiders - not to say that I like them (AT ALL), but The fact that they don't fly usually makes me a bit more calm when I come across even a big one.
> 
> Now, I might be alone on this around here but there's something about wasps and flying, stinging, insects that freaks me out much more. Usually swarms of things freak me out the most (you couldn't get me anywhere near a hornet/yellow jacket/wasp nest), but there are some that make my skin crawl even looking at just one of them...
> 
> ...


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## wheresthefbomb (Oct 17, 2013)

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE

I am so glad to live in frigid interior Alaska because it is too cold for any spiders larger than a small wolf spider. Magic mushrooms have alleviated some of my spider terror, but not all, not by a long shot.


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## Devyn Eclipse Nav (Oct 18, 2013)

All the giant bugs in this post: 





I don't mind spiders outside, hell we have one about an inch long living behind our mailbox we've named Uncle Fred or something like that.

When it comes to being in the house, though, all insects must die. Trespassing upon the Weir domain is punishable by death.

Sorta makes me glad that I might be moving to Canada...


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## Waelstrum (Oct 18, 2013)

^ Escape spiders to face bears.


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## AxeHappy (Oct 18, 2013)

Bears are awesome. Spiders are evil. 

Tarantula Hawk Wasps are awesome. Precisely because they destroy large spiders. And look bad ass. Black with red wings? Ornately curved antenna? They're like the BC Rich of the insect world. Except back when BC Rich made quality guitars.


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## Necris (Oct 18, 2013)




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## Vhyle (Oct 18, 2013)

Rotatous said:


> Honestly, I can usually deal with spiders - not to say that I like them (AT ALL), but The fact that they don't fly usually makes me a bit more calm when I come across even a big one.
> 
> Now, I might be alone on this around here but there's something about wasps and flying, stinging, insects that freaks me out much more. Usually swarms of things freak me out the most (you couldn't get me anywhere near a hornet/yellow jacket/wasp nest), but there are some that make my skin crawl even looking at just one of them...
> 
> ...



*FUKK NO.*


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## pink freud (Oct 18, 2013)

Necris said:


>


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## RevDrucifer (Oct 19, 2013)

Jesus ....ing Christ...

I JUST posted in another thread about how I've been looking into moving to Australia, (from Florida)....uh....hmm....

I've had an experience with a Brown Recluse.....and about 100 of it's little ....ing babies hiding under a towel in the bathroom. Up to this day, I was a pretty big arachnophobe. Opened the door, saw something run under the towel, flicked the light on, picked up the towel and felt the shit run down my leg.

They just started scattering in every direction. I grabbed the bottle of rubbing alcohol and dumped out 3/4's worth a bottle onto the floor then lit it up. The mother didn't get scorched, nor did a few babies. I put them inside a jar sitting in water until my bassist hooked me up with little sample jars filled with formaldehyde he got from his medical office. Once I had them in the jars and I could see them up close, it wasn't so bad and my fear started to dwindle.

So far the worst thing I've been bitten by has been fire ants. Those ....ers are BRUTAL. Nonstop itching and swelling for a month straight. Last time I got bit, I had to stop playing mid-song during practice because my chest was so tight and I was dizzy enough to need to sit down. .... those ....s.


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## flint757 (Oct 19, 2013)

Sounds like you're allergic to fire ants. Sucks bro.


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## dedsouth333 (Oct 19, 2013)

pink freud said:


>



This has to be one of the best things I've ever seen 

Especially the "ass dagger" part.


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## RevDrucifer (Oct 19, 2013)

flint757 said:


> Sounds like you're allergic to fire ants. Sucks bro.



Yeah, could be worse, I COULD be allergic to latex. 

Crazy thing was that only 2-3 bit me and still caused those effects.


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## ilyti (Oct 19, 2013)

Waelstrum said:


> ^ Escape spiders to face bears.


 Only in the country. Come to a large city (where most of the population of the country lives) and face squirrels, chipmunks and raccoons. Actually, in the big cities a moose or elk might just saunter into the road and shut down traffic for a few hours before the f'ing police shoot it because they don't have tranquilizer darts.

Yeah, that keeps happening and I get mad every time I hear about it.


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## flint757 (Oct 19, 2013)

RevDrucifer said:


> Yeah, could be worse, I COULD be allergic to latex.
> 
> Crazy thing was that only 2-3 bit me and still caused those effects.



I'm so glad I don't have a latex or nut allergy.  It limits your options severely.


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## Sephiroth952 (Oct 20, 2013)

Rotatous said:


> *shudders*


Well at least respect his amazing stache.


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## Lava Joe (Oct 20, 2013)

The 'gallery' of this thread.


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## pink freud (Oct 21, 2013)

There was a recent cracked article that puts Seattle on the WTF creature list. The article was about some pink millipede, but the type we have around here apparently do it too:

They secrete. F-ing. Cyanide.

Harpaphe haydeniana - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Millipedes can excrete something that gets humans war-crimes charges...


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## Devyn Eclipse Nav (Oct 21, 2013)

Waelstrum said:


> ^ Escape spiders to face bears.



I can take out a bear with a few shotgun blasts. Spiders are too damn small.


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## sniperfreak223 (Oct 21, 2013)

Zeno said:


> I can take out a bear with a few shotgun blasts. Spiders are too damn small.




Damn you!!! Now I have "Davidian" stuck in my head.


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## Necris (Oct 21, 2013)

pink freud said:


> There was a recent cracked article that puts Seattle on the WTF creature list. The article was about some pink millipede, but the type we have around here apparently do it too:
> 
> They secrete. F-ing. Cyanide.
> 
> ...








The shocking pink dragon millipede.
(Desmoxytes purpurosea)


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## Xaios (Oct 21, 2013)

Mother nature is a crazy bitch, apparently.


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## Grand Moff Tim (Oct 21, 2013)

She's an angry drunk, to be sure.


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## Sithman55 (Oct 22, 2013)

what all mighty being would create the these things


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