# My Band Is Dead



## eleven59 (Feb 4, 2007)

So, during the time I wasn't posting on here, my band broke up. 

Our singer was causing more problems, and getting worse as time went on.

Musically we all wanted to go in different directions.

My drummer wanted a more radio-friendly, punkier sound.

My singer wanted something gothier where she didn't have to worry about making the music sound good so she could stand on stage and have people look at her.

My bassist and I just wanted to make good music that covered all our influences, where there were no rules, and where we could have fun and actually like the music we were making.

Things went south with my drummer and singer both hating each other and trash talking each other behind their backs. I was the only one talking to everyone and saying what was on all of our minds, and so I became the bad guy as far as our singer saw things. She said some nasty things to me, claiming the band was backing her up, and shortly after that e-mail (we never talked about these issues in person or anything, only by e-mail) I got e-mails from my drummer and bassist saying that they totally didn't support anything she had said. My drummer mainly saying he hated her, but my bassist basically saying he was totally behind me and wanted to be in a band with me, even if this didn't work out. 

Long story short, my drummer moved back home to Sarnia because he got sick of waiting for something to happen. Which is fine, since Bergin (the bassist) and I wanted to move on to something new anyways and were looking for an excuse. 

Shortly after that, my singer messaged my bassist saying "Well, looks like we need a new drummer...and guitarist." He basically said "Fuck that" and now it's just me and him, the way things started. 

So, we're working on some new ideas, and planning on getting a new band together to do something completely different from our former band. And we've both been listening to some really random stuff (Opeth, Porcupine Tree, Primus, Sigur Ros and Mastadon myself) and plan on doing something really different where nothing's off limits. I'm excited, we just have to stop procrastinating and actually get this thing going.


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## AsIAm666 (Feb 4, 2007)

Damn man, that blows. I feel for you though....I've been in that same position too many times in my life...and unfortunately I think I'm starting to get pulled backed into that position again with my current band. Long story.  Good luck man.


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## jaredowty (Feb 4, 2007)

That sucks man, but that's good that you're stickin with the bass player. It seems like the people that you start bands with in the first place are always the ones that will stick with you (my bass player and I are like that). Good luck.


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## Naren (Feb 4, 2007)

I would say "Hey, man. That sucks." But I actually think you'll be happier this way. So, I guess I'll say, "Glad to hear that! Get that new band up and going and play what you want to!"



eleven59 said:


> Shortly after that, my singer messaged my bassist saying "Well, looks like we need a new drummer...and guitarist." He basically said "Fuck that" and now it's just me and him, the way things started.



What's up with that? Geeez.


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## mefrommiddleearth (Feb 4, 2007)

that sucks but by the sound of things your bassist is a good dude that you get along with and has a similar way of thinking so this could just be a fiery start to a very beutiful thing


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## LilithXShred (Feb 4, 2007)

Take this as a great opportunity. Ok your old band split up, that really sucks but i found that sometimes splitting up is the best thing that can happen to a band. It might take a lot of time to find new musicians but it'll be worth it. Take your time and find some badass members, at the same time try to improve your skills, find new influences and practice (there is always new stuff to discover  ).

Good luck and keep the faith


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## garcia3441 (Feb 4, 2007)

eleven59 said:


> Our singer was causing more problems, and getting worse as time went on.
> 
> My singer wanted something gothier where she didn't have to worry about making the music sound good so she could stand on stage and have people look at her.
> 
> ...




Sounds like she has a serious case of Lead Singers Disease, and thinks that she is Irreplaceable. It may take some time but you'll find an even better singer.


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## Jason (Feb 4, 2007)

Fuck it. Start from scratch. It will be better this way, you can assemble a new band to your liking. From what I heard of your band vs. the stuff you wrote on your own. Your solo stuff is much better.


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## Shawn (Feb 5, 2007)

Sorry to hear that, Aaron.  

I hope you and your bassist can get this other band started and I hope it works out, good luck and keep us posted!


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## angryman (Feb 5, 2007)

Sorry to hear that dude it's never nice to hear of a band splitting up, but in this instance it sounds like it's for the best. Your Bassist sounds like a top Bloke who obviously has the same ideals as you & also wants to start a new project with you so you've already got a good foundation right there.


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## Korbain (Feb 5, 2007)

typical women lol


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## Alpo (Feb 5, 2007)

The worst thing to have in a band is a bloated ego. Find some great players who are really down to earth, and start over.


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## Ancestor (Feb 5, 2007)

Sorry, dude. That blows.


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## eleven59 (Feb 5, 2007)

Naren said:


> I would say "Hey, man. That sucks." But I actually think you'll be happier this way. So, I guess I'll say, "Glad to hear that! Get that new band up and going and play what you want to!"
> 
> 
> 
> What's up with that? Geeez.



Yeah, that's how I've been looking at it 



garcia3441 said:


> Sounds like she has a serious case of Lead Singers Disease, and thinks that she is Irreplaceable. It may take some time but you'll find an even better singer.



Worse, she's into modelling and fashion now. 



.jason. said:


> Fuck it. Start from scratch. It will be better this way, you can assemble a new band to your liking. From what I heard of your band vs. the stuff you wrote on your own. Your solo stuff is much better.



Thanks. Yeah, I was definitely held back by what our drummer and singer could do/would accept. I had a lot of songs that were typical verse/chorus/verse/chorus/bridge/chorus format that our singer would get lost in. And the drummer just didn't get anything heavy.



angryman said:


> Sorry to hear that dude it's never nice to hear of a band splitting up, but in this instance it sounds like it's for the best. Your Bassist sounds like a top Bloke who obviously has the same ideals as you & also wants to start a new project with you so you've already got a good foundation right there.



Yeah, we're planning on getting together and recording some rough demos to get some ideas going and then looking for some like-minded musicians to get something really fun and solid going. 

He's a great bassist too (though I'd never tell him too much to his face, or it'd go to his head lol), listens to a lot of early Metallica, Iron Maiden, Primus, Mastadon, etc. and has musical tastes about as wide as mine. Sometimes he'll come up with stuff that I never would have thought of to go with my riffs. It's great. 

Thanks everyone, I'll keep you posted when we have demos done.


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## noodles (Feb 5, 2007)

I've heard enough about your singer in past posts to peg what she is all about. The last thing you need to be wasting your time with is some bitchy prima donna who seeks to make the band a vehicle for her to garner attention to herself. I've seen enough bands with chick singers who are hot...right up to the point where they open their mouth, making it brutally obvious that they care more about eye shadow than nailing the right notes.

Good for you. It sounds like you have a musical partner in the bassist, so start writing some new tunes and look for the right people.


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## eleven59 (Feb 5, 2007)

noodles said:


> I've heard enough about your singer in past posts to peg what she is all about. The last thing you need to be wasting your time with is some bitchy prima donna who seeks to make the band a vehicle for her to garner attention to herself. I've seen enough bands with chick singers who are hot...right up to the point where they open their mouth, making it brutally obvious that they care more about eye shadow than nailing the right notes.
> 
> Good for you. It sounds like you have a musical partner in the bassist, so start writing some new tunes and look for the right people.


You're dead on right about her. We've been wanting to get rid of her for months, but all our gear was at our practice space, which was her house...until she moved back home with her parents 

Yeah, I can't wait to start working on some new stuff.


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## eaeolian (Feb 5, 2007)

noodles said:


> I've heard enough about your singer in past posts to peg what she is all about. The last thing you need to be wasting your time with is some bitchy prima donna who seeks to make the band a vehicle for her to garner attention to herself. I've seen enough bands with chick singers who are hot...right up to the point where they open their mouth, making it brutally obvious that they care more about eye shadow than nailing the right notes.



Huh. Where have we played with that band before? 

Seriously, Dave's right on the money - there's no reason to deal with that crap.


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## Drew (Feb 5, 2007)

Well, on one hand, I was kind of looking forward to driving up to see you guys sometime, and nailing your vocalist after the show. 

On the other, I think it goes without saying that you're going to be WAY happier if you can find a few like-minded individuals. I will say, however, that this: 



eleven59 said:


> My bassist and I just wanted to make good music that covered all our influences, where there were no rules, and where we could have fun and actually like the music we were making



...is possibly going to get you into trouble down the road. As much fun as it may be to go from a death metal song to a country song to an old-school R&B song, a huge part of a band's identity is to make everything they do sound like "them." You can pull it off, I'm sure, but it'll require having everyone in the band on the exacty same wavelength. You're probably better off, IMO, trying to find your sound as a group, rather than just saying, "ok, we're all influenced by all these diseparate things... Go!" and hoping the results hang together. Then, for the things that don't really fit, well, do some solo stuff on the side too get it out of your system.


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## eleven59 (Feb 5, 2007)

Drew said:


> Well, on one hand, I was kind of looking forward to driving up to see you guys sometime, and nailing your vocalist after the show.



I do recall you saying something about that before 



> On the other, I think it goes without saying that you're going to be WAY happier if you can find a few like-minded individuals. I will say, however, that this:
> 
> ...is possibly going to get you into trouble down the road. As much fun as it may be to go from a death metal song to a country song to an old-school R&B song, a huge part of a band's identity is to make everything they do sound like "them." You can pull it off, I'm sure, but it'll require having everyone in the band on the exacty same wavelength. You're probably better off, IMO, trying to find your sound as a group, rather than just saying, "ok, we're all influenced by all these diseparate things... Go!" and hoping the results hang together. Then, for the things that don't really fit, well, do some solo stuff on the side too get it out of your system.



That's the general plan, is to come up with a focused overall sound and identity, but that's somewhat more varied than what we were doing before. The general idea being that we want something that covers more of what we want to do, as opposed to our old band where we were held back by the other members wanting to do other things.


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## Drew (Feb 5, 2007)

eleven59 said:


> I do recall you saying something about that before



 She'd have swooned before my pink polo shirt and sexy stratocaster blues licks.


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## eaeolian (Feb 5, 2007)

Drew said:


> She'd have swooned before my pink polo shirt and sexy stratocaster blues licks.



So *that's* how you get the chicks - the sensitive approach.


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## Drew (Feb 5, 2007)

eaeolian said:


> So *that's* how you get the chicks - the sensitive approach.



 I've been doing all right for myself of late...


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## Rick (Feb 5, 2007)

That sucks man. Been there, done that.


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## noodles (Feb 5, 2007)

eaeolian said:


> Huh. Where have we played with that band before?



"What do you mean we don't get free beer?!?!" <throws hissy fit>





eleven59 said:


> You're dead on right about her. We've been wanting to get rid of her for months, but all our gear was at our practice space, which was her house...until she moved back home with her parents



"Pfft! I'm an *artist*. No one can ever hope to understand some...DAMMIT, MOM, I'M DOING AN INTERVIEW!!! I'LL CLEAN MY FUCKING ROOM LATER!!!"


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## eleven59 (Feb 5, 2007)

Drew said:


> She'd have swooned before my pink polo shirt and sexy stratocaster blues licks.



Yeah, somehow I doubt the gothy girls go for that sort of thing 

And here's what's keeping her too busy to keep the band going:









noodles said:


> "What do you mean we don't get free beer?!?!" <throws hissy fit>
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Wow, that sounds so familiar, except...oh yeah, she wouldn't consider herself an artist, and we'd never get an interview


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## Jason (Feb 5, 2007)

eleven59 said:


>



 thats just retarted.


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## noodles (Feb 5, 2007)

Horrible makeup aside, she ain't that good looking.


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## Jason (Feb 5, 2007)

noodles said:


> Horrible makeup aside, she ain't that good looking.



manly jaw.


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## Drew (Feb 5, 2007)

You never know, dude - opposites attract.  

And I agree, that's a very unflattering picture. No accounting for personal taste. 



.jason. said:


> manly jaw.



...says the guy who likes fat chicks.


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## Jeff (Feb 7, 2007)

Can't go wrong pulling influences from Porcupine Tree, Opeth, and Primus!
As for that chick.....damn, I wouldn't touch her even with a borrowed dick.


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## Jason (Feb 7, 2007)

Drew said:


> ...says the guy who likes fat chicks.



and that has what to do with what?


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