# Dark Tower teaser/trailers are out.



## KnightBrolaire (May 2, 2017)

http://bloody-disgusting.com/news/3...er-arrives-tomorrow-check-new-motion-posters/

Full trailer is out tomorrow apparently.


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## wankerness (May 2, 2017)

KnightBrolaire said:


> http://bloody-disgusting.com/news/3...er-arrives-tomorrow-check-new-motion-posters/
> 
> Full trailer is out tomorrow apparently.



Why do they do this instead of just releasing the frickin trailer


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## technomancer (May 2, 2017)

This looks like a freaking train wreck, glowing guns and snapping bullets out of the air


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## marcwormjim (May 3, 2017)

I intend to see the film at a bar theater full of hecklers. Even ignoring Johnny Marketing's brainstorm to change the race of the protagonist for no reason anyone will cop to, this project has been in development hell for too long to come out as even a _solid_ turd.


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## twizza (May 3, 2017)

They ruin everything cool.


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## Lorcan Ward (May 3, 2017)

Reloading by catching bullets in the air? I hope they don't turn the fighting into the matrix.

Edit: full trailer is up. I'm not sure what to make of it. Visually it looks amazing but they've really twisted the story up and not in a good way imo, especially Jake's.


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## MFB (May 3, 2017)

Lorcan Ward said:


> Reloading by catching bullets in the air? I hope they don't turn the fighting into the matrix.
> 
> Edit: full trailer is up. I'm not sure what to make of it. Visually it looks amazing but they've really twisted the story up and not in a good way imo, especially Jake's.



Seriously, this is pretty odd. 

Jake having visions of the other world, knowingly walking into a portal to SOMEWHERE, etc... it's just, not Dark Tower-esque. He was our fish out of water character that the reader identifies with as the stranger in this new land, but now it's seems sort of _Last Action Hero_ where the kid has more info about the characters and it's like a play he gets roped into.


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## KnightBrolaire (May 3, 2017)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BquA78fFhus

ehh.. I'm just going to pretend this has nothing to do with the books and treat it as a good stupid action movie. I guess IT is my only hope for a decent steven king movie besides the shining/salem's lot/the mist.


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## Jarmake (May 3, 2017)

KnightBrolaire said:


> I guess IT is my only hope for a decent steven king movie besides the shining/salem's lot/the mist.



How about rita hayworth and the shawshank redemption and green mile?

And for this dark tower movie... Uh oh. Doesn't look promising at all.


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## Lorcan Ward (May 3, 2017)

MFB said:


> Seriously, this is pretty odd.
> 
> Jake having visions of the other world, knowingly walking into a portal to SOMEWHERE, etc... it's just, not Dark Tower-esque. He was our fish out of water character that the reader identifies with as the stranger in this new land, but now it's seems sort of _Last Action Hero_ where the kid has more info about the characters and it's like a play he gets roped into.



I really don't like how they are trying to cover themselves by saying its a sequel/retelling/etc, as if that makes it ok to completely change up the story. Jake's story in books 1 + 3 is my favourite part of the story after the Mejis arc and we are getting very little of that here.


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## KnightBrolaire (May 3, 2017)

Jarmake said:


> How about rita hayworth and the shawshank redemption and green mile?
> 
> And for this dark tower movie... Uh oh. Doesn't look promising at all.



yeah forgot about those, good call. Thinner is also pretty good imo.


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## wankerness (May 3, 2017)

KnightBrolaire said:


> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BquA78fFhus
> 
> ehh.. I'm just going to pretend this has nothing to do with the books and treat it as a good stupid action movie. I guess IT is my only hope for a decent steven king movie besides the shining/salem's lot/the mist.



Looks like it's going to end with a sky portal. Also, makes it look like it's in the style of a young adult book adaptation


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## KnightBrolaire (May 3, 2017)

wankerness said:


> Looks like it's going to end with a sky portal. Also, makes it look like it's in the style of a young adult book adaptation



well minus the guy getting his brains blown out at the end of the trailer, sure.


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## wankerness (May 4, 2017)

KnightBrolaire said:


> well minus the guy getting his brains blown out at the end of the trailer, sure.



And? You think a bad guy getting shot makes it mature and for adults? That happening in the dark like that doesn't really mean anything, worse things happened in PG-13 movies (ex, X-Men Apocalypse, or even the first Hunger Games). Even if it ends up being rated R, it still looks like it's about a plucky kid who encounters a gritty old guy and helps him get his groove back. There are many examples of R-rated kids movies, some good (Attack the Block), some bizarre failures that are hard Rs but were clearly made for kids and end up movies for no one (Ice Cream Man!). 

The trailer is cut in such a way it makes it sound like he's having to convince Roland to stop the tower from destroying the world. Argh. I'll hope it's just an awful trailer and it's a movie that they can't figure out how to market, instead of some portent of something that's going to be cut up by committee over the next months into schizophrenic, movie-for-no-one form like Suicide Squad. After the examples of the latter recently, I'm not very hopeful. The main thing that bugs me is just how it seems so Jake-centric, and especially how this makes it seem like Roland is content with letting the world be destroyed until Jake tells him how great earth is.


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## technomancer (May 8, 2017)

WTF is with Jake giving Roland a pep talk like he was going to give up or something? The entire essence of Roland's character was that he was completely obsessed with the Tower above all else. He sacrificed EVERYTHING for the quest. That scene makes me think they completely missed the essence of the character. Bleh train wreck. I'll rent it and treat it as a dumb action flick 

They have forgotten the face of their fathers.


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## watson503 (May 8, 2017)

technomancer said:


> WTF is with Jake giving Roland a pep talk like he was going to give up or something? The entire essence of Roland's character was that he was completely obsessed with the Tower above all else. He sacrificed EVERYTHING for the quest. That scene makes me think they completely missed the essence of the character. Bleh train wreck. I'll rent it and treat it as a dumb action flick
> 
> They have forgotten the face of their fathers.



 That sums it up perfectly


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## bostjan (May 8, 2017)

When Savannah asked Blaine "What has four wheels and flies," Blaine quickly answered: "The Dark Tower (2017)."


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## Drew (May 8, 2017)

I'm being open minded about this one. 



Spoiler



As I understand, this is set as a "sequel" of sorts to the Dark Tower series, picking up in the books at the epilogue, where Roland finds himself back at the start of The Gunslinger, in the desert, but with the Horn of Eld at his belt. That leaves a LOT of room for artistic license, which, if done well, could work pretty well.



Switching the race of the lead character is a bit tricky, especially with all the Detta/Odetta drama, but Elba is such a badass that I'm willing to hear it out (and, I think, the casting seems to work well in the trailer). I actually was really hoping he'd be the next Bond.


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## Lorcan Ward (May 8, 2017)

^See that was a really cool idea when King posted it on his twitter but its now being used as an excuse to cover their asses for blatantly disregarding the source material. If Jake actually sits Roland down for a pep talk then they've completely twisted his character up so much that its not even Roland.

Anybody ever check out the graphic novels, the Gilead ones were really good since they fill in the story between Wizard & Glass and the Gunslinger opening.


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## KnightBrolaire (May 8, 2017)

Lorcan Ward said:


> ^See that was a really cool idea when King posted it on his twitter but its now being used as an excuse to cover their asses for blatantly disregarding the source material. If Jake actually sits Roland down for a pep talk then they've completely twisted his character up so much that its not even Roland.
> 
> Anybody ever check out the graphic novels, the Gilead ones were really good since they fill in the story between Wizard & Glass and the Gunslinger opening.



the graphic novels are awesome, they're part of what prompted me to read the books, even though I was a huge stephen king fan before


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## wankerness (May 9, 2017)

I read the first four books (the fifth wasn't even out yet back when I was a Stephen King fan) and have good memories of at least 2-4, but I don't really know if I want to re-read them so I can read the infamous last three. It seems like they are very...controversial!

One of my major synesthesia memories was reading Wizard and Glass while listening to the Smashing Pumpkins - Adore album a lot. Those two really tied in for me!


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## marcwormjim (May 10, 2017)

Feel free to PM me with any questions you might have about the last few turds Uncle Stevie wrote - Though, admittedly, I didn't read "Wind Through the Keyhole."


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## MFB (May 10, 2017)

marcwormjim said:


> Feel free to PM me with any questions you might have about the last few turds Uncle Stevie wrote - Though, admittedly, I didn't read "Wind Through the Keyhole."



Didn't miss a god damn thing. I don't think I've ever been that disappointed with a sequel/addition to the world-building like with WttK.


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## marcwormjim (May 10, 2017)

Can't see it being worse than the 7th book.


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## MFB (May 10, 2017)

marcwormjim said:


> Can't see it being worse than the 7th book.



I didn't mind any of the books, but I also had them all at once; whereas for other readers, they had to wait between them, so it had the potential for massive letdown after years of waiting (like some other authors *cough*Martin*cough*)

But WttK bored me to tears and I wondered what the point of even writing it was


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## technomancer (May 10, 2017)

Drew said:


> I'm being open minded about this one.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Yeah sorry the whole concept seems to just be getting pushed to cover them not actually adapting the books and throwing random pieces together. I'm honestly not sure if King is just so excited to see this finally hitting the screen that he is ignoring the inadequacies or if he has a royalty deal on the box office...



Spoiler



Sorry being time looped with the Horn of Eld doesn't change your heritage (both race and being a descendant of King Arthur) and give you magical glowing guns 



Fortunately It, Bladerunner 2049, and Alien Covenant all looking awesome is somewhat softening the disappointment of this looking terrible.


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## wankerness (May 10, 2017)

I'm kinda looking forward to alien covenant. I read a couple good reviews and I think I'm going to avoid reading any more to avoid souring myself (or hyping myself up too much).


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## KnightBrolaire (May 10, 2017)

wankerness said:


> I'm kinda looking forward to alien covenant. I read a couple good reviews and I think I'm going to avoid reading any more to avoid souring myself (or hyping myself up too much).



yeah I've been hearing a lot of good things about it. I'm pretty excited for it.


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## Lorcan Ward (Jul 10, 2017)

Not sure what to make of the new trailer, it doesn't feel very Dark Tower/Stephen King at all, everything looks off and overly simplified like they've turned into an action packed superhero good vs evil film.


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## wankerness (Jul 10, 2017)

Lorcan Ward said:


> Not sure what to make of the new trailer, it doesn't feel very Dark Tower/Stephen King at all, everything looks off and overly simplified like they've turned into an action packed superhero good vs evil film.



The trailers look terrible. But, who knows. I remember the trailers for Batman Begins looking bad, I remember thinking it was going to be a really awful movie. It COULD surprise us? (probably not)


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## technomancer (Jul 19, 2017)

And King announced the run time is 95 minutes... this just keeps getting less epic by the minute


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## Jarmake (Aug 4, 2017)

The first review I saw gave this epic adventure a 1/5 and called it "a wasted turd" or something like that. Just as expected.


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## KnightBrolaire (Aug 4, 2017)

bloody disgusting said it's a huge waste of time. Basically all the fight scenes/ good jokes are in the trailer and roland is the only interesting character in the film.


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## Lorcan Ward (Aug 7, 2017)

Its no surprise that this is tanking in its opening weekend with a rating of around 16-19% on rotten tomatoes. From the reviews I've watched and read it sounds like a complete mess. The trailers were also meant to be very misleading and if you haven't read the books you will be very confused. They could have easily just worked The Gunslinger into a movie instead of trying to make their own 8 books into 1 version.


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## Triple7 (Oct 5, 2017)

Loved the books...but the movie was absolute garbage.


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## technomancer (Nov 10, 2017)

You know, I just watched this and until the last half hour I would have said it was a decent flick loosely inspired by King's Dark Tower... but nope, the end combat scenes were horrible and the climax was so anti-climactic it wasn't even funny. That's ignoring the lobotomy they gave the plot and most of the concepts and characters.


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## thraxil (Nov 11, 2017)

Loved the books, was really excited by the trailers. Heard the first reviews and haven't even bothered seeing the movie yet. I'm sure some day it'll be on Netflix and I'll watch it because there's nothing else, but I'm in no hurry.

I guess they're still talking about a TV series that stays a bit more true to the books, so maybe something good will still come out of it all.


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## marcwormjim (Nov 11, 2017)

FX will have some slots open - Maybe they’d be willing to develop a reiteration of this proven turd. They may even make it past that wobbly first step of whether or not to change the race of the protagonist for no reason.


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## Lorcan Ward (Nov 11, 2017)

I watched the film recently. It was really boring. The worst part of the film is it assumes you read the books since it has constant nods to the source material that only fans will understand but if you've read the books you won't understand why they crammed 7 books into 1 vaguely related film while twisting the characters into hollywood cliches.

At least they can't make a sequel now and the TV show is very unlikely to happen. Downsides is nobody will want to touch this for a long time. With a few changes the Gunslinger would make a great film, especially the other world scene with Jake.


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