So it turns out I'm gay...

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Sang-Drax, May 22, 2010.

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  1. Sang-Drax

    Sang-Drax God is dad

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    Many civilized people would probably read this and think, "yeah, so?" It's the best news in my life for the past decade, however, and I'd like to share it with you.

    For the last years, I so much refused to accept who I was that I managed to conceal the feelings from my own self. I abdicated my human condition, coming to the conclusion that I was an automaton, uncapable of loving; existing, but not really living. It's incredible how we can lie to ourselves so convincinly.

    Everything tasted like ashes. Nothing I did was interesting, to the degree of having an awesome trip to Italy and not really caring about it. My guess is that I had to drown my feelings to such an extent that I ended up not feeling anything at all toward anything. The only thing that could still bring a shiver to the spine sometimes was music, and even that was becoming rarer and rarer. When that happened, I've no doubts I'd seriously consider suicide.

    This past week, for no apparent reason, I decided to face to truth. I went like, "you know what? Fuck it," and now things are so much different. I mean, I haven't really met anyone in particular; it's just the perspective of doing so that makes everything so much different. It's like getting your head out of the water to breathe again.

    For the first time in 15 years - when I last fell in love for a girl - I feel happy and human. I can't help but quote The Smiths: "I am human and I need to be loved - just like everybody else does".

    Just like everybody else does. I can't believe I'm human, after all. It's such a damn relief!

    I do have a very conservative family which most likely won't accept me, but hell, c'est la vie. At least I live in a liberal city, and I don't expect too many problems with my friends either.

    Thanks for reading thus far :yesway:

    And I can still boast of having picked the hottest chick at my friend's wedding! Huzzah! :lol:
     
    Shawn, Jakke, highlordmugfug and 62 others like this.
  2. matt397

    matt397 Tr00f

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    Hey good for you mang, it must take balls (no pun intended :rofl:) to come out like that.
    Oh an what the fuck is it with gay guys always picking up the hot chick, its like some one grabbig the last slice of pizza just to look at it.
     
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  3. vampiregenocide

    vampiregenocide A Chap Called Ross

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    Good man on coming out :) Massive respect.
     
  4. Sang-Drax

    Sang-Drax God is dad

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    Thank you :)

    And the pizza analogy is fucking brilliant :lol:
     
  5. Prydogga

    Prydogga Giddyup.

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    Damn, you must be like 50% hotter now that you're accepting you're gay :lol: Too bad for those gorgeous chicks you can probably pull.

    All jokes aside, glad that you can come out, here I definitely think it's a safe and warm environment, as far as the internet goes (A metal guitar forum! who knew? :lol:) I doubt you'd cop any flame here.

    Congrats for taking what must be a valuable step in your life, hope it continues to keep your life at an improvement from before, hope suicide becomes the least of thoughts on your mind in future.

    Again congrats! :village:

    EDIT: Also 3 replies in the time it took to write mine. :rofl:
     
  6. Psychobuddy

    Psychobuddy edxgxsrfrz

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    Hey congratulations man, as stated before it takes guts to come out like that.

    Your life will no doubt be much more worthwhile now and you should definitely enjoy living much much more.

    Also if anyone gives you shit for being gay grab some ss.org buddies [I know there's a few people from Rio on here] and give 'em hell.........or just scare them it's up to you:lol:
     
  7. Cheesebuiscut

    Cheesebuiscut Loves his Q-tuners

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  8. JJ Rodriguez

    JJ Rodriguez Contributor

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    You might want to pick up a couple of these to get in shape:

     
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  9. Prydogga

    Prydogga Giddyup.

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    I wouldn't mind receiving some genetic inertia right now. :coffee:
     
  10. mattofvengeance

    mattofvengeance Team Ibanez

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    Congrats, bro. It definitely takes courage to step up and accept something like that.
     
  11. ralphy1976

    ralphy1976 1 less ERGNESS

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    so are you the only gay in your village?

     
  12. Sang-Drax

    Sang-Drax God is dad

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    ^ :lol:. I really hope I don't look anything close to that! :ugh:

    I'm the third gay in my office, actually. One of my colleagues, though not openly gay, is way too fabulouth to be straight :lol:; and one of my bosses is lesbian (she also happens to be both the nicest one and the prettiest). I've my doubts if the big boss is lesbian too, but she's so nuts overall that it's hard to tell. Considering we're just some 15'ish people working there, that's a high gayness rate.

    I have no homosexual close friends, though. Or maybe my gaydar is underdeveloped.

    :lol: @ shake weight!

    Tell me about, man. I know things will be hard (no pun intended) from now on, but seriously, it couldn't get any worse than it was before.

    I think only I and Leandro live Rio among ss.org regulars. There's also 2 or 3 from São Paulo (6 hours away from here by car) and 2 from Florianópolis (18 hours by car), but one of these was banned for leaking Periphery's album and claiming he had all the right to do it :lol:.

    Regardless, I don't expect to have this kind of trouble. Fortunately, things have evolved a lot in the last years concerning overall prejudice.

    My generation (25-30ish) is still a little biased against both homosexuality and black people (yup, still), but I've noticed a huge, I mean, HUGE improvement with people not even that much younger than me. The generation prior to mine is barbaric, though. Had I been born 10 years earlier, I don't know if I'd have the balls to accept this.
     
  13. playstopause

    playstopause Contributor

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  14. Prydogga

    Prydogga Giddyup.

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    Having Leandro around is more than enough, THE MAN HAS SURVIVAL PANTS.

    It's in the name. :cool:
     
  15. BigPhi84

    BigPhi84 Pronounced "FEE"

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    What???:eek::eek::eek::eek: Oh, you said ashes. My bad. :lol::lol::lol::lol:

    Congrats on figuring out what makes you happy. There are plenty of people that never realize these types of things and wonder why they have to constantly take depression medications. I don't know how conservative Brazil is, (I just know that the chicks have the hottest buns in the world and fake boobs are everywhere) but I hope you can live your life how ever you want to and not be persecuted because of it. :yesway::hbang:
     
  16. BigPhi84

    BigPhi84 Pronounced "FEE"

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    He might like this version better. :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
     
  17. Origin

    Origin Rainbow In The Dark

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    Courage, dude. I'm happy for you :yesway:
     
  18. E Lucevan Le Stelle

    E Lucevan Le Stelle in love with Judas

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    Aww, congratulations! Trust me, everything does improve a lot...

    Oh, if you're ever in London, I'll totally take you out for a drink sometime!

    *thinks Brazilian guys are totally hot...* ahem.
     
  19. Prydogga

    Prydogga Giddyup.

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    *Thread just filled with sexual tension*
     
  20. DrakkarTyrannis

    DrakkarTyrannis WWSD?

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    Well as head Sexual Deviant of SS.Org, I'd like to...


    Tell you to get the fuck out.. :squint: This is my hen house..there ain't enough ass on this forum for all of us.
     
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