Not sure what to do... (Someone threatening suicide)

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Spaced Out Ace, Feb 25, 2018.

  1. Spaced Out Ace

    Spaced Out Ace 0 0 1 0 0 6 5 0 3\

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    So, someone on another forum had a relationship problem regarding their wife leaving them for another man, etc. The guy seemed to be staying positive, there for his kids, and moving on, but just posted a thread that basically they planned to end it after making a gesture to the ex regarding working it out or something along those lines. She said she'd think about it, didn't show, and so on, and he is now threatening to buy oxy's with their next paycheck on Thursday.

    I wasn't sure what to do, so I alerted the admin of the forum via Facebook, and suggested the person who posted the thread call the National Suicide Prevention hotline. They also pointed out that they are going to counseling and taking pills [antidepressants maybe?] and I've heard those could cause thoughts of suicide, and similar bad decisions.

    What should I do? Should I do more? Was that the right thing to do? I haven't the slightest clue.
     
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  2. Ebony

    Ebony Blastology

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    Just for clarification, was this towards you guys on the forum or to his wife?
     
  3. Spaced Out Ace

    Spaced Out Ace 0 0 1 0 0 6 5 0 3\

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    I think it was something he decided to share with the forum. He didn't mention whether or not he told her that he planned on doing this. To be honest, it's sort of a weird situation to be in. ie, knowing someone wants to harm themselves in the hopes they die, but not knowing what to do.
     
  4. Ebony

    Ebony Blastology

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    If this is a person you don't know in real life, I'd say you've already gone the extra mile to help out. These things can be difficult enough even if the person in question is someone you've known for 20+ years. And at the end of the day, if the person is actually being serious (as in actually considering suicide, as opposed to flirting with it like so many do), there's usually little anyone else can do to prevent that from happening.
     
    Last edited: Feb 25, 2018
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  5. BornToLooze

    BornToLooze SS.org Resident Redneck

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    As someone who's been there before, nothing is the right thing to do. When you're that depressed you brain doesn't work right. I had people that took me out to try and cheer me up, people that told me to suck it the fuck up and start being happy again, or my mom threw me in therapy so maybe if I took enough pills it would make me "normal". None of it did jack shit.

    But what I have noticed, everyone I've met that was like, "Oh my God, I'm so depressed I want to kill myself" just wanted attention.
     
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  6. NateFalcon

    NateFalcon SS.org Regular

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    Point and laugh...but seriously, you can’t tell someone how to be happy. If they’re gonna “end it all” over being cheated on then whatever...there’s kids with cancer and leukemia who make these people look like butt-f-ing quitters...
     
  7. NateFalcon

    NateFalcon SS.org Regular

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    Once you have kids, suicide is off the table...being cheated on and learning how to cope in an integral part of adolescence IMO. It’s different for late bloomers and people who didn’t (or couldn’t lol) date when they were younger, they seem to take it hard. I remember the first time I caught my GF blowing some other dude in a tent when we went camping ...it’s a funny story now, but I remember that shitty feeling...it made me a better person, really...what you do with it is up to you. Personally, it just makes good stories and humor later.
     
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  8. BornToLooze

    BornToLooze SS.org Resident Redneck

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    Every now and then mine are still the only reason I bother waking up in the morning.

    I got lucky on the GF blowing someone else. When the was the only reason I was still with her was she was the easiest way to get cigarettes when I 16 you tend to give less fucks if she cheats on you.
     
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  9. NateFalcon

    NateFalcon SS.org Regular

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    Now the guy can (hypothetically) go ask out that cute coffee girl, or the hot older broad across the street without feeling bad...once he’s tasting a different girl, he’ll be stoked all over again
     
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  10. Randy

    Randy ROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOU Super Moderator

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    ITT: Horrible advice
     
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  11. NateFalcon

    NateFalcon SS.org Regular

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    There is no good advice...you can move on, or let your life go to shit...some people clearly choose the latter
     
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  12. Randy

    Randy ROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOU Super Moderator

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    Yes, nobody's ever offered emotional support to someone who was considering suicide, prevented them from doing it, with that person ultimately turning their life around. Nope, has never happened, why try?
     
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  13. KnightBrolaire

    KnightBrolaire hardtail crusader

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    :shrug: not much more you can do to help them, you alerted the admin/posted the NSP hotline #. if they really want to kill themselves, they probably will.
     
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  14. NateFalcon

    NateFalcon SS.org Regular

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    Maybe you can help the guy out...humor works for me, and all of this is “third party” and kind of tongue-in-cheek from my end but I think my advice is golden: 1. You got your health (presumably), things could be worse. 2. Dating more will get you more aware of relationship pitfalls (being cheated on is a right of passage IMO)- you’re not alone. 3. Remembering that new opportunities are ALWAYS out there -one door closes, another opens. 4. What’s on the other side might not be “better” - learn to love this life...
     
  15. Randy

    Randy ROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOU Super Moderator

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    That's a very common misconception/pseudo-science myth that's out there. The pills don't make a person committee suicide. It's hard to overlook a person is suicidal or depressed at the point they turn to a counselor or medication, meaning they're at a low point, so of course they're more prone to committing suicide at that time. That's like saying people only die from cancer BECAUSE they're on chemo therapy.

    Also, as someone who's been on mood altering medications, it doesn't turn you into a suicidal/homicidal zombie like Alex Jones would make people thing. Ever notice how a large portion of people who attempt suicide or take anti-depressants are adolescents? It's not just because of bullying or girls or whatever, it's because of all the really intense hormonal and chemical shifts and the brain of the individual not being used to it (which is actually what CAUSES things like bullying). A person acting rationally might get dumped and slunk their shoulders, cry and then move on. When a person is inundated with a rush of intense chemicals that correlates with an intense life event, they are inclined to explode and/or react irrationally. The antidepressants essentially distract the brain in a way that limits it from overreacting from these intense chemicals emotional events, so you're not feeling bombarded with the feeling you need to explode. It basically levels you out.

    In my experience (and others I've known who take them), an intense anxiety or depressive event that'd typically wreck you, you're more inclined to stop and think about it and/or move on rather than feeling like you NEED to react (that itchy feeling most people get if theyre anxious or nervous or whatever).

    But it's not a miracle drug, nothing is. All any drug is doing is raising or lowering chemicals in your body and your body decides what happens next. And if someone has already rationalized something they want to do or drawn a line in the sand, no drug is going to make them take that back. A lot of people who choose to take an antidepressant (or any drug, or alcohol) assume it's going to just make everything go away or make them a new person and when they take it and the effects aren't what they expect, they frequently decide "oh well, this didn't fix it" and they just decide to go through with whatever their original plan dictated.
     
  16. Randy

    Randy ROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOU Super Moderator

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    Anyway, to the OP, you definitely went above and beyond and it's out of your hands at this point. You should feel good about what you did regardless of how it plays out.

    For what it's worth, I've known people who have committed suicide and all of them didn't tell anyone they were going to. I'm not saying it's an absolute hard and fast rule but the bulk of people who are legitimately suicidal just want to die and they're not going to tell anyone because they don't want anybody to stop them.

    That doesn't diminish it when somebody makes the threat but typically threatening to kill yourself is more of a cry for help than a road map. Clearly it's someone who's hurt and feels like nobody cares or at least whoever they want to know they don't feel like they care, so it's an attempt to get their attention. Nobody likes "the boy that cried wolf" but regardless of their sincerity in the threat, it's someone that's hurting and should be taken seriously. I say that because I'd rest easy that it's LIKELY everything will be fine and you're a good guy for trying to help.
     
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  17. NateFalcon

    NateFalcon SS.org Regular

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    ...And is any of THAT pill info considered “advice” for this guy?...first off, he’s already supposedly suicidal. Second, this guy has kids to support and he’s “threatening to spend next paycheck on oxy”...sounds like this guys putting on a production for attention, not a cry from an addiction standpoint. Once again, there is no recipe for “happiness”, no offense to anyone.
     
    Last edited: Feb 25, 2018
  18. Randy

    Randy ROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOU Super Moderator

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    The guy isn't here. Nobody's giving advice to the guy, we're giving advice to the OP (see previous post). Two entirely different things.

    Thanks for the contribution though, emotional counselor Jason Voorhees.
     
  19. NateFalcon

    NateFalcon SS.org Regular

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    You’re the pro, apparently...maybe your vast knowledge of pharmaceutical advice would help suicidal people feel better...? Everytime this subject comes up, certain people feel enlightened on the subject despite the fact they always admit “they know people who’ve committed suicide” to validate their closeness to the subject...while ALSO unknowingly admitting that their advice didn’t stop their friend/loved ones suicide. Suicide is “en Vogue” right now and the rest of us are just trying to be happy ourselves
     
  20. Randy

    Randy ROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOUROOMFORYOU Super Moderator

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    Classy.
     
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