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Old 01-03-2008, 02:11 PM   #1
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Striking Writer's Top 10 Demands, Letterman style

Letterman's Top 10 demands of striking writers - CNN.com

NEW YORK (AP) -- Striking television writers delivered David Letterman's Top 10 list, "Demands of the Striking Writers," on his show Wednesday:

10. "Complimentary tote bag with next insulting contract offer" -- Tim Carvell, from "The Daily Show."

9. "No rollbacks in health benefits, so I can treat the hypothermia I caught on the picket lines" -- Laura Krafft, from "The Colbert Report."

8. "Full salary and benefits for my imaginary writing partner, Lester" -- Melissa Salmons, writer for daytime TV.

7. "Members of the AMPTP must explain what the hell AMPTP stands for" -- Warren Leight, writer for "Law & Order: Criminal Intent."

6. "No disciplinary action taken against any writer caught having inappropriate relationship with a copier" -- Jay Katsir, from "The Colbert Report."

5. "I'd like a date with a woman" -- Steve Bodow, from "The Daily Show."

4. "Hazard pay for breaking up fights on 'The View' " -- from writer and director Nora Ephron.

3. "I'm no accountant, but instead of us getting 4 cents for a $20 DVD, how about we get $20 for a 4-cent DVD?" -- Gina Johnfrido of "Law & Order."

2. "I don't have a joke. I just want to remind everyone that we're on strike, so none of us are responsible for this lame list" -- Chris Albers from Conan O'Brien's "Late Night."

1. "Producers must immediately remove their heads from their -----" -- author Alan Zweibel.

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Old 01-03-2008, 02:45 PM   #2
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That's like the best top ten I've seen in years.

"...and everything under the sun is in tune, but the sun is eclipsed by the moon."

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Old 01-03-2008, 02:47 PM   #3
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Old 01-03-2008, 02:47 PM   #4
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Dave rules. It was awfully nice of him to have his writers under contract before he returned to.
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Old 01-03-2008, 02:49 PM   #5
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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

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Old 01-03-2008, 04:01 PM   #6
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Division: American Metal without the suck.
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Old 01-03-2008, 10:22 PM   #7
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i lold
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Old 01-03-2008, 11:25 PM   #8
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How awesome was his beard?

Jetzt liegst du hier, ganz regungslos, in meiner hand und meinem schoß, du bist so kalt...
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