Redneck Vasectomy (joke time!)

Popsyche · 05-21-2007, 11:35 PM

THE REDNECK VASECTOMY

After their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they
could not afford a larger bed.

So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin
didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could
fix the problem but that it was expensive. "A less costly
alternative," said the doctor, "is to go home, get a cherry bomb, (fireworks
are legal in Alabama) light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up
to your ear and count to 10."

The Alabamian said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest
tool in the
shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear
is going to help me."

"Trust me," said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held
the can up to his ear and began to count!

"1"

"2"

"3"

"4"

"5"

At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and continued
counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Tennessee , Kentucky , Louisiana , Arkansas , Texas, Mississippi , Missouri , North Carolina, Florida , West Virginia and Washington DC .

B Lopez · 05-21-2007, 11:59 PM

garcia3441 · 05-22-2007, 12:03 AM

The Dark Wolf · 05-22-2007, 12:35 AM

I didn't even have to read the joke to know what it was. One of my oldie-but-goodie faves.

Nice one, Billy Bob.

djpharoah · 05-22-2007, 12:50 AM

Haha - love redneck jokes.

Vince · 05-22-2007, 12:53 AM

ha...

I was thinking it was going to be the "kick his sister in the jaw" punchline

settite · 05-22-2007, 12:56 AM

rofl

metalfiend666 · 05-22-2007, 04:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Dark Wolf

I didn't even have to read the joke to know what it was. One of my oldie-but-goodie faves.

Nice one, Billy Bob.

Same here, but I still love the joke.

nitelightboy · 05-22-2007, 06:33 AM

It doesn't work in South Florida. Other than that, friggin awsome

telecaster90 · 05-22-2007, 10:22 AM

You forgot South Carolina

Rick · 05-22-2007, 11:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by desertdweller

ha...

I was thinking it was going to be the "kick his sister in the jaw" punchline

That's what I was thinking.

Not everyone in Texas is a redneck!

Zepp88 · 05-22-2007, 11:24 AM

You forgot "east" Virginia

bostjan · 05-22-2007, 11:33 AM

Classic!

Battle-axe · 05-22-2007, 12:13 PM

I was not expecting it to end like that!

distressed_romeo · 05-22-2007, 12:59 PM

Jason · 05-22-2007, 08:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by desertdweller

ha...

I was thinking it was going to be the "kick his sister in the jaw" punchline

+1

Unknown Doodl3.2 · 05-22-2007, 09:11 PM

oompa · 05-23-2007, 12:20 AM

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05-21-2007, 11:35 PM	#1
Popsyche Beer Sewer Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Bethlehem, PA Posts: 5,108 Thanked: 224 Feedback Score: 1 reviews	Redneck Vasectomy (joke time!) THE REDNECK VASECTOMY After their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. "A less costly alternative," said the doctor, "is to go home, get a cherry bomb, (fireworks are legal in Alabama) light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10." The Alabamian said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest tool in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me." "Trust me," said the doctor. So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count! "1" "2" "3" "4" "5" At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and continued counting on his other hand. This procedure also works in Tennessee , Kentucky , Louisiana , Arkansas , Texas, Mississippi , Missouri , North Carolina, Florida , West Virginia and Washington DC . If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? www.myspace.com/wfkoehleriii http://mysite.verizon.net/vzeo7bjr/index.html

05-22-2007, 12:03 AM	#3
garcia3441 Tone Whore Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Little Rock, AR Posts: 5,433 Thanked: 88 Feedback Score: 0 reviews	"Im sick and tired of hearing things From uptight, short-sighted, narrow-minded hypocritics All I want is the truth Just gimme some truth. " John Lennon

05-22-2007, 12:35 AM	#4
The Dark Wolf *Canis lupis obscurus* Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Toledo, Ohio. USA Posts: 15,477 Thanked: 94 Feedback Score: 0 reviews	I didn't even have to read the joke to know what it was. One of my oldie-but-goodie faves. Nice one, Billy Bob. http://www.wolf.org

05-22-2007, 12:56 AM	#7
settite Legion of Doom Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Arizona Posts: 144 Thanked: 5 Feedback Score: 0 reviews	rofl Pie

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05-21-2007, 11:59 PM	#2
B Lopez Vescere bracis meis. Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Killafornia Posts: 3,530 Thanked: 74 Feedback Score: 10 reviews

05-22-2007, 12:50 AM	#5
djpharoah Awwww Yeaaaah • Super Moderator • Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Cali' Posts: 13,175 Thanked: 320 Feedback Score: 117 reviews	Haha - love redneck jokes.

05-22-2007, 12:53 AM	#6
Vince Vince is X!!! Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Tempe, AZ Posts: 5,643 Thanked: 113 Feedback Score: 3 reviews	ha... I was thinking it was going to be the "kick his sister in the jaw" punchline

05-22-2007, 06:33 AM	#9
nitelightboy I poop in shoes. Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Ft Liquordale, FL Posts: 4,190 Thanked: 20 Feedback Score: 2 reviews	It doesn't work in South Florida. Other than that, friggin awsome I am the mask you wear.

05-22-2007, 10:22 AM	#10
telecaster90 Smokestack Lightning Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Nashville, TN Posts: 2,592 Thanked: 43 $telecaster90 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $telecaster90 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $telecaster90 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $telecaster90 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $telecaster90 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $telecaster90 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $telecaster90 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ Feedback Score: 0 reviews	You forgot South Carolina Fender Junkie Myspace Montezuma Fire Machine Clorange

05-22-2007, 11:24 AM	#12
Zepp88 Arktanian Diplomat Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: A Technological Deadzone Posts: 10,343 Thanked: 92 Feedback Score: 5 reviews	You forgot "east" Virginia http://www.sevenstring.org/forum/off...-org-chat.html Withersoul - Monolithic Epic Doom Metal M.W. Tremblay - Needs readers!

05-22-2007, 11:33 AM	#13
bostjan Spastic Kitchen! Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: St. Johnsbury, VT USA Posts: 7,564 Thanked: 15 Feedback Score: 1 reviews	Classic! [URL="http://sites.google.com/site/bostjanzupancickhereb/"[/URL]

05-22-2007, 12:13 PM	#14
Battle-axe ss.org Regular Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: -- Posts: 438 Thanked: 4 Feedback Score: 0 reviews	I was not expecting it to end like that!

05-22-2007, 12:59 PM	#15
distressed_romeo F'king ............ Join Date: May 2005 Location: Melnibone (duh!) Posts: 10,718 Thanked: 233 Feedback Score: 0 reviews	Define 'well-adjusted'... http://farsideguitars.blogspot.com/

05-23-2007, 12:20 AM	#18
oompa Ze.. Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Pine Cone Pandaemonium Posts: 1,394 Thanked: 26 Feedback Score: 0 reviews	Eat Shit. Billions of flies can't be wrong.

05-22-2007, 09:11 PM	#17
Unknown Doodl3.2 look at each other.. Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Montreal Posts: 3,203 Thanked: 28 $Unknown Doodl3.2 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $Unknown Doodl3.2 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $Unknown Doodl3.2 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $Unknown Doodl3.2 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $Unknown Doodl3.2 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $Unknown Doodl3.2 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ $Unknown Doodl3.2 is rather kvlt and tr00. \m/$ Feedback Score: 2 reviews

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