So my band is ....ed

[Konfyouzd]

Who pays for the roof that keeps you dry when it rains?

[SoldiersOfFilth]

Originally Posted by datalore

To the OP:

Your father's approach sounds pretty inappropriate, but I would also recommend that you don't bother tagging along as a merch guy. Being a merch guy is shitty, and touring is expensive and time consuming. If I were you, I'd stay home and practice with my own band.

I would but they ARE my band lol. and their merch guys usually are able to help out with the stage experience, wether it be vocals or guitar playing on a song.

[SoldiersOfFilth]

Originally Posted by Konfyouzd

Who pays for the roof that keeps you dry when it rains?

da gubment

[FACTORY]

In my experience pot = believing "Back To The Future" is real which in turn guarantees many years of success and 40 grand in debt on a Delorean purchase in an alternate universe.

You have been warned.

[highlordmugfug]

Originally Posted by SoldiersOfFilth

da gubment

[SirMyghin]

Originally Posted by SoldiersOfFilth

da gubment

What you seem to be overlooking is that just because you live on the military base doesn't mean housing is 'free'. It doesn't cost your father anything MONETARILY, but it is his sacrifice to his country that pays for that housing.

If I was 18, and took off to do something my parents were dead set against, you had better believe I wouldn't be welcome back in the house on my return. He doesn't need to let you live with him thereafter. That is the thing about being an adult, actions have consequences, and if you want to do something you had best be able to accept all the possible damaging reprocussions. Sure you can 'do what you want', but you cannot do it without consequences and that is why you really need to sit down and talk with him as Ross suggested, and really think through what this will do for, and to, you overall.

[WickedSymphony]

Originally Posted by SirMyghin

If I was 18, and took off to do something my parents were dead set against, you had better believe I wouldn't be welcome back in the house on my return. He doesn't need to let you live with him thereafter. That is the thing about being an adult, actions have consequences, and if you want to do something you had best be able to accept all the possible damaging reprocussions.

[avenger]

Go but make sure you bang lots of hoes by telling them you can get them backstage. Return a man.

[BucketheadRules]

If you're so keen to leave, remember that he's well within his right to make you unwelcome when you do get back.

[vampiregenocide]

As much as I respect the whole 'he looks after you and pays your way, therefore respect what he says' argument, theres only so far that can go. I think once you get to 18 you need to be allowed to grow a bit more, and parents have a responsibility to loosen the shackles on their children somewhat. Maybe this tour is a bad idea, maybe he won't like it, but at least he will have learnt something by the end of it.

[Blind Theory]

I am going to be 18 in May so I understand the whole age part of this. Here's the thing, I am in a band as well, I would ....ing LOVE to play music for a living. The actuality of that happening? Not high but more obscure things have happened before.
It is all cool to play in a band, work at it and try to achieve things. DON'T go out and sell merch for the rest of your band members in their other band. They may be your friends but you are also cheap and easy labor to them. Don't rule out extra education. I know you said it is free so that isn't a huge deal but still, don't sell yourself short as a "merch boy."

Work your two jobs this summer, save up, get new gear, find new people to jam with and start a new band with. Maybe set some prerequisites about drug usage so your dad doesn't piss himself. That's what I did, no one in my band does drugs or drinks. It works out a lot better. You get more done and the parents are happy so both parties win.

No offense to your friends but .... 'em. They don't need a merch guy. It isn't like they will sell anything to their fans while they are playing. They will have plenty of time to sell merch while waiting to play and after they play, that's when the majority of sales will happen anyway. They are just lazy (go figure! a lazy pot-head?! That's unheard of!). They will survive without you.


Edit: and to add to what everyone is saying, touring with the band as the merch guy is hardly experience. Sure you ride with all the guys in the band and you go to their shows but you don't actually see stage time...at all. You are the bitch boy...I mean...you sell their merch for them, for little to no money and you don't get actual musical experience. Sounds like a LOT of fun to me...

[Konfyouzd]

Originally Posted by SirMyghin

What you seem to be overlooking is that just because you live on the military base doesn't mean housing is 'free'. It doesn't cost your father anything MONETARILY, but it is his sacrifice to his country that pays for that housing.

If I was 18, and took off to do something my parents were dead set against, you had better believe I wouldn't be welcome back in the house on my return. He doesn't need to let you live with him thereafter. That is the thing about being an adult, actions have consequences, and if you want to do something you had best be able to accept all the possible damaging reprocussions. Sure you can 'do what you want', but you cannot do it without consequences and that is why you really need to sit down and talk with him as Ross suggested, and really think through what this will do for, and to, you overall.

Apparently your rep cup overfloweth with Konfyouzd lovin'...

[Konfyouzd]

Originally Posted by vampiregenocide

As much as I respect the whole 'he looks after you and pays your way, therefore respect what he says' argument, theres only so far that can go. I think once you get to 18 you need to be allowed to grow a bit more, and parents have a responsibility to loosen the shackles on their children somewhat. Maybe this tour is a bad idea, maybe he won't like it, but at least he will have learnt something by the end of it.

Right... I wholeheartedly agree. However, if you still live under someone's roof it's best to at least discuss your feelings with that person rather than taking matters into your own hands.

[Necris]

I'm 100% with your dad on this one, I wouldn't want my son going on tour with a bunch of potheads, especially if it was just so he could sell their merch for them. Being dragged around the country in a cramped van that smells like pot and cigarettes to a bunch of shows you don't even get to play at is a torture I wouldn't wish on anyone, especially for no pay. I've never even heard of Thrill of a Gunfight so I imagine they aren't so big that they don't have time to sell merch after their set. Bands who are far more well known sell their own shit at shows.

You had mentioned there was a chance that maybe you would get to play a song on stage with them, but my advice to you is if you want to play live so badly, start looking for new band members that aren't already committed to another touring band. Right now it is very clear that Thrill of a Gunfight takes precedence over your project and if the members had to choose between playing for you or going on tour they would drop out of yours in a heartbeat.