[Vince]

This could be a great thread, post more of these if you find any real gems, these are so funny


Reliability: 4
oooh, see heres the thing i get worried about. i have only played like 4 gigs with this cabinet, and its already pretty much covered in war scars. the headstock of my strat went straight through the grill cloth, like it was paper. . .ive never scene anything so fragile thats meant to protect something else. I didnt think aobut it because ive hit the front of my old marshall AVT cabinet, and i never actually went thorugh the cloth. I found a place online that sells mesa grill cloth though, which is pretty cool because im replcing the fender silver cover on my head iwth the mesa stuff, and whenever i feel the need i can replace the front of my cabinet. . .and no buyer will ever know the difference, although i wouldnt lie, id tell them i replaced it just as any of you would of course!

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Sound Quality: 10
I REVIEWED THE RECTO 2-12 UNFAVORABLY A WHILE BACK. AFTER TWO SHOWS WITH IT SOUNDING LIKE HARSH, SPITTY CRAP, I HAD TO DO SOMETHING.
SINCE IT WAS 500 BUCKS I WASN'T GOING TO BUY ANOTHER CAB IN A FLASH - SO I MODIFIED IT MYSELF.
THIS MOD WAS EASY, COST NOTHING, AND CHANGED EVERYTING !
THIS CAB SOUNDED VERY BOOMY - ALOT OF LOW END, SPITTY RAZOR SHARP HIGHS, AND MUDDY CARDBOARD MIDS. IT SOUNDED LIKE A HOLLOW WOOD BOX.
I OPENED IT UP - AND THAT'S WHAT IT WAS - NO SOUND DAMPING MATERIAL INSIDE AT ALL !
I GRABBED SOME 2 INCH WEDGE- SHAPED AURALUX FOAM REFLEXION KILLING MATERIAL I HAD LEFT OVER FROM MY LIVINGROOM WALLS - DON'T LET YOUR LANDLORD SEE YOU PUT THAT CRAP EVERYWHERE - HE WILL FREAK !
THE STUFF IS CHEAP - GO TO , " YOUR AUDIO" - ON WEST 30TH ACROSS FROM ULTRASOUND - TALK TO BOBBY NEILL- HE'LL TRY TO SELL YOU A 500, 000 DOLLAR MIXING BOARD BUT TELL HIM YOU JUST NEED SOME GOD DAM FOAM !
USE STRONG GLUE - GOOD FOR SNIFFING - AND LINE THE ENTIRE INSIDE OF THE CABINET WITH THE STUFF.

[Vince]

Another great one:

Reliability/Durability: 5
What can I say, I have it since a year playing at home 1 hour a day three times a week, and I have broke almost 50 strings, all on the bridge side, I don't play more because sometimes i have to change one or two strings in a 1 hour session, even though i had became a really fast changin the strings, it so annoying had to stop from time to time to fix the problem. The dealers don''t know why it happens so i'll send it to a luthier for fix it. I know it only happens to me so don't be afraid if you wanna buy a new one,

[Digital Black]

Price Paid: US $349



Purchased from: N/A
Guitar Center

Features: 5
For information on all this stuff, check out the Fender website. It's a Stratocaster style body with a, uhm, I believe "Seymour Duncan Invader" pickup in it -- i'm not sure really what that is all about. Tom's guitars never had anything like THAT in them...hmm...on with the review!
When I saw this guitar in a local guitar shop, my jaw DROPPED. A Tom DeLonge (aka "Tom Rollin' Thunder" DeLonge) signature guitar -- at last!! I used to see Tom play every Wednesday night at the Fickle Pickle club in Chicago for the past 20 years (well until 1998 when he passed away). He's always been a huge influence on me, as well as COUNTLESS other guitarists (do the names Buddy Guy and Muddy Waters ring a bell? I think he even showed Rev. Gary Davis a thing or too). What surprised me the most, was that even though Tom never had a record deal (and refused to sign a record deal, because he thought it compromised his authenticity as a BLUES man), he now has a Fender signature Strat.
Is his family cashing in on his name, or what? Did some Fender rep see him during one of his last shows (he died shortly before his 87th birthday), and was inspired... much like myself? I don't know! All I know is that when I saw that *the* Tom DeLonge had a signature guitar, I had to buy one. Buy it I did, but then things soon went downhill...

Sound: 1
Well, like the late Tom "Rollin' Thunder" DeLonge, i'm a self proclaimed bluesman. Been playing the blues for over 30 years. I have a couple teenagers now, and a wife, and all that stuff... but the blues still runs through my soul. I've been searching for a nice affordable guitar to fit my needs, but didn't find one suitable until this Strat came into my life. The last real "nice" guitar I had was a 1965 Fender Jazzmaster. I played it in my first band "The Surfing Wombats" (don't ask, everyone went through a surf phase back then! Even YOUR parents probably...). So it's been awhile since i've had something of comparable quality.
Ok, anyway...
My first complaint is THIS: why is this guitar a Strat? Tom DeLonge NEVER played a Strat! He always used "Miss Bessie", his trusty Gibson ES-135. I think he named Miss Bessie after a woman he had an affair with in the 50's... I think she stabbed him in the eye with a pencil when she found out he was cheating on her (that's the legend behind Tom's eyepatch anyhow!).
I saw Mr. Rollin' Thunder about 200 times, and never saw him play anything but an ES-135. Well, in 1975 he played a Les Paul... but who didn't? Everyone wanted to be like Michael Bloomfield that year it seems.
So that's my major gripe. But I tried to overlook it.
The sound of this guitar blew me away... but not in the way I hoped for. Tom always had a smooth and thick tone. Never too over the top, and never too sharp. He didn't use overdrive or "those damn Japanese #$%#box pedal thingies", as he'd say. It was clear tone... and when he hit those high notes -- it'd make your soul squirm. Phew!
But this Strat... I can't figure it out. I'd like to dial in the tone, but I can't!! There's no tone control!! Just a volume knob.
What the hell is this "Invader" pickup?? I know i'm not exactly the hippest dude around, but are companies naming their pickups after World War 2 bombers (my father flew an A-26, by the way) now?? What's next? The Seymour Duncan "Mitchell"?? Hell...
This pickup really sounded like crap. What is Fender trying to do?? I couldn't nail Tom's sound no matter how hard I tried. My son walked into the room, and instantly had this look on his face. I knew it was bad (he obviously heard the racket from the other room), so I told him to leave me alone for a bit with my new guitar.
The more I tried, the less I liked. Tom's tone was not to be found. Instead of a smooth balanced sound, I sounded like the guitarist for The Van Halen's! With disgust, I threw the guitar back in the box it came in. Oh! That's another thing: cases aren't included anymore?? I'm writing a letter to Fender as soon as I finish this review.

Action, Fit, & Finish: 5
Well I bought the guitar from Guitar Center. I think it had 9 gauge strings on it... roundwounds, nonetheless. I quickly swapped them out for Thomas Inkenfield 11 flatwounds. The neck started bowing, so I had to switch back to 9's. I just couldn't get comfortable with this thing.
Another thing...
Miss Bessie was a weather, checkered, worn shade of black. This thing is SURF GREEN! Why? I mean, if you're not going to get the same BRAND AND MODEL guitar, you might as well match the color... right? Wrong! I bet Tom DeLonge is rolling in his grave right now.
As previously mentioned, I got frustrated with the guitar and put it back in it's case. Well, my buddies from work and I have a blues band (we're called "The Chicago Hot Smokin' White Bluesmen", come check us out!!)... we gig on the weekends. That night we had a show to do, in front of a crowd of 200 or so. Well, I thought i'd give this guitar another try...
After our second song, we decided to play an original number... one that we wrote to celebrate the life of Tom DeLonge. It's a tune that I wrote called "Lost My Eye In Georgia". To show tribute to Mr. Rollin' Thunder, I reached into the box and pulled out my new Tom DeLonge signature Strat.
The look on the crowd was priceless... the look on my band's face was unforgettable. And that was BEFORE I even hit a note. I looked around, the place went silent... I could feel the spotlight burning my skin. I put the guitar back in it's case and let out a nervous laugh... my "HA HA"'s echoed... I picked up my trusty Epiphone Dot, and we went into the song. No one even had any comments or questions after the gig about my new guitar... everyone just LEFT. I tried to stop Gary at the door, but he said "Hey, i'm tired, see you at work tomorrow".
I never got a chance to use the guitar in a live situation, which is what I regard as the ultimate test.

Reliability/Durability: 5
I'm not sure about the reliability of this instrument. The neck bowed when I put some real man's strings on it, but that's the only problem I had. The "Invader" pickup seemed to work fine, even though it sounded like crap (I imagine the sound from this guitar is similar to the sound of bombs being dropped on Berlin).
I took the guitar back the next day. I told the salesman what a travesty the instrument is, and how Tom DeLonge would sue Fender if he was still around (although he'd probably lose the case on purpose so he would have more blues material for a few new songs). The salesman had no idea what I was talking about and gave me some blank stare. By this point, I was fuming. I grabbed him by the shoulder and we went into the sound room and I DEMONSTRATED how awful this guitar sound. He told me that what I was hearing is exactly what fans of Tom DeLonge like... oh boy... that idiot of a salesman got a lesson on the late "Rollin' Thunder" as well as a list of DeLonge's contributions to Chicago blues.

Customer Support: 5
We'll see what they say when they get my letter of disapproval. I'm also going to E-mail them the URL of this review!! Overall Rating: N/A
This guys got the wrong Tom Delonge. Which explanes his confusion...

[Vince]

that's great and well worth the read! Oh the horror of sounding like "one of the guitarists for the Van Halen's"

[Metal Ken]

well, i dont want to sound like that either, so i dunno. But this is hilarious. as much as i dont like blues, i'd probably rather have listened to the old tom delonge than the blink one ;p

[Drew]

hahaha, that's pretty good. It's gotta be a spoof, though, no one's THAT stupid...

Gotta say, though, Blink's "Cheshire Cat" album rocks. Really good emo-punk. And even "Dude Ranch" is pretty decent... They've gone a LONG way downhill since...

-D

[Vegetta]

This was a review for a line6 spider2
Price Paid: N/A

Features: 1
Has a bunch of neat looking shiny chromed knobs and puts on a nifty light show with the LEDS when you first power it up. The cool thing about this amp is that instead of the knob positions going from 1 to 10, they go from "light odor of fart-gas" to "someone took a crap right in your ear". Cool! I really like the "Smart FX" section because you have to be really smart to operate 2 knobs and I am smart!

Sound Quality: 1
I love the sound of this amp because I play music that is purposely supposed to sound really bad and fake. This is the perfect match for my style! I love the way the digital feedback makes my teeth hurt and makes the audience wince like I just killed a cat on stage. I've never seen an amp do that before so it must be inovative! This is truly the future of music. There has already been enough good sounding music in the world and it's getting pretty old and boring. It's time to make horrible sounding music! The only way I can describe the high-gain settings on this bad-boy is "Painfully crisp, yet tonally muddy." I have never been able to ac
heive that sound with any other amp! I really like the settings that are named after my favorite songs.

Reliability: N/A
This amp could survive a nucular war!

Customer Support: N/A
Never had to contact them but I hear they're real swell fellas.

Overall Rating: 1
This amp f*****g rawks!

Submitted by Anonymous at 07/26/2004 16:06

[macalpine88]

This amp could survive a nucular war!

what a tard, whats a nucular war i think he eats paint chips

[Vince]

bump.

[Vacant]

Originally Posted by Vegetta

This was a review for a line6 spider2
Price Paid: N/A

Features: 1
Has a bunch of neat looking shiny chromed knobs and puts on a nifty light show with the LEDS when you first power it up. The cool thing about this amp is that instead of the knob positions going from 1 to 10, they go from "light odor of fart-gas" to "someone took a crap right in your ear". Cool! I really like the "Smart FX" section because you have to be really smart to operate 2 knobs and I am smart!

Sound Quality: 1
I love the sound of this amp because I play music that is purposely supposed to sound really bad and fake. This is the perfect match for my style! I love the way the digital feedback makes my teeth hurt and makes the audience wince like I just killed a cat on stage. I've never seen an amp do that before so it must be inovative! This is truly the future of music. There has already been enough good sounding music in the world and it's getting pretty old and boring. It's time to make horrible sounding music! The only way I can describe the high-gain settings on this bad-boy is "Painfully crisp, yet tonally muddy." I have never been able to ac
heive that sound with any other amp! I really like the settings that are named after my favorite songs.

Reliability: N/A
This amp could survive a nucular war!

Customer Support: N/A
Never had to contact them but I hear they're real swell fellas.

Overall Rating: 1
This amp f*****g rawks!

Submitted by Anonymous at 07/26/2004 16:06

One word comes to my mind:

Fucktard.